Leading Egyptian government daily Al-Akhbar seems to be trying to out-crazy John Conyers and Dick Durbin; but it probably won’t be long before some previously unassuming Democrat stands up on the Senate floor and announces that Abu Mus’ab Al-Zarqawi is working for America. (Hat tip: LGF readers.)

“All the evidence proves that Abu Mus’ab Al-Zarqawi is working for America, because his victims are Iraqis and not [members of] the coalition forces under the command of the American occupation forces in Iraq. Abu Mus’ab Al-Zarqawi’s official title is ‘leader of Al-Qa’ida’s faction in Iraq.’ Osama bin Laden is the commander of the Al-Qa’ida organization, and this proves that [Al-Zarqawi’s commander,] bin Laden, has [also] been an American agent ever since he operated against the USSR forces in Afghanistan in favor of the Americans!

“Let’s read the statement issued two days ago on behalf of Al-Zarqawi in Iraq after he killed and wounded dozens of people from among the Interior Ministry and Iraqi army forces, by means of booby-trapped cars in a number of cities in Iraq!

“Raising a few questions is unavoidable in order to clarify the situation and [to understand] who this Al-Zarqawi with Jordanian nationality is.

“One of the questions is: which of the two should Al-Zarqawi oppose – the American occupation army and the foreign coalition forces, or the Iraqi military and police forces?! The statement issued by Al-Zarqawi and his organization says that they struck and killed dozens of [members of] the Interior Ministry and Iraqi army forces, whereas there was no mention of Al-Zarqawi targeting the American occupation forces and the coalition forces of the various nationalities. [In fact,] the statement did not even mention the occupation army in Iraq!”

The Massacre of the Iraqi People is Aimed at Strengthening the U.S. Occupation in a Region Vital to American Interests

“Another question [to be raised] is whether the world is so naive as to believe the American statements, which claim that Washington has allocated $25 million for Al-Zarqawi’s arrest or for information leading to his arrest. [After all,] why arrest Al-Zarqawi and allocate all these millions while he is working for America?

“In addition, why is Al-Zarqawi massacring innocent Iraqi citizens and [members of] the Iraqi National Guard, the Iraqi army and the Iraqi Interior Ministry? Al-Zarqawi undeniably aims to harm the Iraqi people and members of the Iraqi forces, who undergo training to protect [their] homeland in the future. This massacre of the Iraqi forces and the Iraqi people is meant to strengthen the American occupation of the region [that is known to be] the main route to Central Asia, formerly under USSR control, [and that is] rich in oil wells, and surrounds Iran and the Caspian Sea…”

The US government gives Egypt more than $2 billion a year in foreign aid.