Be the Worst Victim on Your Block!

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You too can be a star of the Grievance Theater, with Dr. Sanity’s Practical Guide to Victimhood!

Victimhood has, as is usual these days, been in the news recently. From the pathetic heroic attempts of John (“it was only a joke”) Kerry to paint himself a “victim” of the “Republican attack machine” for his ignorant brilliant remarks about US military personnel; to the flying imams ongoing claims of oppression and victimhood as they extort money and publicity suitable compensation from their terrible ordeal even as they deliberately undermine airport security expose the evils of racial profiling and Islamophobia—the victimhood scams opportunities are neverending.

If you have any doubts about the power and sanctity that can be yours if victimhood status can be officially confered upon you; or of the endless moral benefits of being “oppressed”; just consider that even a mean SOB like Saddam Hussein can be deemed a victim of American oppression—just ask Ramsey Clark how that is done! Or that, for the sake of the Palestinians—the most publicized and creative perpetual victims in all of history— a group of “experts” are busy right at this very moment trying to prove that the entire world has been bamboozled by a clever Jewish conspiracy regarding the Holocaust! Those darn Jews!

The Holocaust Deniers are particularly noteworthy in the annals of victimhood, and demonstrate a degree of unsurpassable cleverness because they have managed to take the actual victims of a horrific episode in world history and twist that history to turn those real victims into oppressors! Surely one of the most magnificent applications of the new victimhood rules.

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Last updated: 2023-04-04 11:11 am PDT
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