AP’s Handy Dandy Pocket Casualty Calculator

Charles Johnsonfollow me on twitter
Thu Dec 28, 2006 at 8:53 am PST • Views: 885

Painfully on-target: The New Pocket Casualty Counter From The Associated Press!

Are you freakishly obsessed with the daily casualty count in Iraq? Do you find yourself disappointed when a day or two goes by and no American soldiers die?  Have you ever been at a cocktail party and said, “How can we be so damn jovial when George Bush is responsible for a death toll in Iraq that is approaching one-tenth the total of British dead in the Second Boer War?”

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need the new Associated Press Pocket Iraq Casualty Counter!  Now the information you need to make bizarre, extraneous points about the Iraqi War is at your fingertips, 24 hours a day! The Pocket Casualty Counter uses satellite technology to wirelessly provide instant updates on casualties, as they happen.  And the Pocket Casualty Counter links the death toll with a historical database to provide you with the factual ammunition you need to battle those crazy neo-cons, on the go!  So you’ll be able to say, “I hate to be the one to tell you this, but George Bush has now murdered 10 times the number of people who are eaten alive in an average decade by the Spotted Siberian Tiger.”  Imagine the look of shock on their Christian fundamentalist faces!

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 Frank says:

May your shit come to life and kiss you on the face. -- to Mrs. Gore about parental advisory labels on album covers