From the Iowahawk alternate universe TV archives, another instant timeless classic: ‘That Darn Sandy’.

After the cancellation of the western series ‘Johnny Nuance’ after the 1959 season, CBS turned to the newspaper comic pages to fill its 8 pm Friday night slot. Debuting October 4, 1960, ‘That Darn Sandy’ featured chubby 9-year old Jay Carruthers in the title role of little Sandy Baxter, the pint-size troublemaker made popular by the Hal Langston comic strip.

The series ran four seasons and added several catchphrases to the lexicon, like “gee golly whillikers, Mrs. Grady!” and “I hope Mom and Dad can get me out of this one!” But by 1964 Carruthers had outgrown the role. At 5’6 and 225 pounds, it was difficult for the 13-year old continue playing an impish scalawag.

Typecast, Carruthers found it difficult to land other roles, although he did appear for two season as Billy in the ‘70s ABC campus action series ‘Chutch.’ Since then the former child actor bounced between various careers, including roadie for 80’s glam metal supergroup Foxxy Sexxyn, and a 90’s stint as a State Department counterterrorism analyst. Today Carruthers lives in Lake of the Ozarks, MO, where he sells time share condominiums. He also performs in the community theater and dreams of a return to the screen limelight.

“I’m ready for a comeback,” says the 57-year old Carruthers. “Back when I was a kid in Hollywood I learned the true secret to acting success — remember your lines, and know when to keep your mouth shut.”

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EPISODE 2-03 “Hush Hush at the Library”

OPENING CREDITS

Animated title sequence of cartoon Sandy turning into a whirlwind, breaking through walls, knocking over cartoon Mrs. Grady, lovingly hugged by parents

THEME SONG (performed by The Sid Gonniff Singers)Who pounded nails in the school bus tire?Who ate the pie and set the cat on fire?He’ll steal your heart, and then your candy,Don’t call the cops, it’s just… That Darn Sandy!ANNCR: That Darn Sandy… brought to you by 20-Oxen Team Bleacho and Brown Ball Rockets.

SCENE I: MRS. McGRADY’S BACK YARD

MRS. MCGRADY: Sandy! Sandy Baxter! What in heaven’s name are you doing up in that tree?

SANDY: Golly hi Mrs. McGrady! I’m chopping it down, just like George Washington! Timmm-ber!

(McGrady winces as branch crashes on top of her car)

MRS. MCGRADY: Now you come down here this minute young man! I put up with enough of your shennanigans in the classroom, and now you torment me in my own back yard!

SANDY: Aww, gee golly whillikers Mrs. McGrady!

(Sandy jumps from tree, landing atop Mrs. McGrady)

MRS. MCGRADY (brushes self off): For goodness sake, why would you want to cut down my tree?

SANDY (saluting): I cannot tell a lie… my mom and dad said it ruined the view from our patio.

MRS. MCGRADY: Well, we’ll just see about that! Come with me!

(scene shifts to Baxter’s front foyer)

HAL BAXTER: We’re horribly embarrassed, Mrs. McGrady… I guess Sandy just misunderstood what Helen and I were talking about this morning.

MRS. MCGRADY: A lot of good that does me now! That tree is ruined, and I’ll have to have the rest of it removed professionally.

HELEN BAXTER: Please, Mrs. McGrady. Sandy is really a good boy at heart, and he was just trying to make us happy. We’re really sorry, aren’t we Sandy?

SANDY: Aw, gee whillikers, you know I am, Mom. Sorry Mrs. McGrady!

MRS. MCGRADY: Well, all right. But see that it doesn’t happen again… just in case, I’m keeping his saw! Good evening!

SANDY: See you in class tomorrow Mrs. McGrady!

HAL: Okay, young man, its off to bed with you. Your mom and I have some serious business to discuss.

SANDY: Golly! Like what?

HELEN: Well honey, it’s sort of complicated.

SANDY: You mean like the time when Dad took those babysitters home, and the police…

HELEN: Yes, sort of. See, when Dad was on the school board, there were a few documents and receipts, that were sort of embarrassing…

HAL: … and now that your mom is running for school board president, it’s just that somebody might find them and get, well, the wrong idea, and…

HELEN: That is, if they find them. In the school library.

HAL: The one next to your classroom.

HELEN: In a green cardboard box.

HAL: Marked “School Board Account Ledger 1959.”

SANDY: Ohhhh, I think I understand! You want me to borrow them, like I did with Mom’s office papers.

HAL: Now, we didn’t say that Sandy. Some people might think that would be hypothetically wrong.

HELEN: Yes honey, if the person doing it were hypothetically caught. Just let your conscience be your guide.

SANDY: Gee whillikers Mom — you can count on me!