At Iowahawk’s pad, more problem-solving tips from America’s premier relationship expert: Dear Barry.

Dear Barry:

I try to get along with the people in my neighborhood, but sometimes it can be difficult. Take for example my neighbor “Mahmoud.” Last weekend while I was seeding my lawn, he drove back and forth slowly in front of my house “flipping the bird” from his minivan, which is painted with pictures of bloody corpses and mushroom clouds and “welcome 12th Imam.”  Normally I wouldn’t have given it a second thought (I get “fingered” by a lot of the neighbors), but lately I’ve noticed he has been working on some kind of secret project in his garage with really stinky chemicals. Also, I’ve been getting these constant annoying 3 AM phone calls threatening to kill my kids.

Frankly, I’m sort of worried about the situation, but even the neighbors I get along with tell me I shouldn’t jump to conclusions, and not to make a big deal of it. I don’t want to make waves, but I also don’t want to end up like the Goldbergs who had their house burned down last week. Am I being too much of a “worry wart”? Please help!

Concerned in Northbrook

Dear Concerned:

Misunderstanding and mistrust is a two-way street, and it’s important to ask yourself: what did I do to create this situation? Without thinking, sometimes the things we do can understandably trigger homicidal rage in our friends and neighbors. Put the shoe on the other foot — how would you like it if you had a neighbor who was always showing you up with his big gas-guzzling SUV and manicured hedges?

Before things escalate further, you should take the initiative and invite Mahmoud over for coffee and chit chat.  No preconditions, and maybe you could bring a pie from Bakers Square. While he is enjoying a delicious slice of Boston Cream, let Mahmoud know that you understand his feelings, and you will do whatever it takes to repair your tattered reputation in the neighborhood. As a show of good faith, why not offer him a few bags of fertilizer and fuel for his lawn mower?