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The Dreaded Denver Brown Note

Sun, Jun 8, 2008 at 5:45:32 pm PDT

They have become impossible to parody. Don’t even try. You can’t top this.

Beware the dreaded Brown Note.

Beware of the Brown Note.

That’s the word among some political activists as the Democratic National Convention nears.

As legend has it, the Brown Note is an infrasonic frequency believed to resonate through human body parts and cause a loss of bowel control. Some protesters are convinced that Denver police will amplify such low frequencies to subdue them in August.

“They’ll bring out all the technologies they can get their hands on,” says activist Ben Yager. “I wouldn’t put anything past police in terms of crowd control.”

Sounds paranoid?

(Hat tip: Pianobuff.)

Also see:
Silly Moonbat Story of the Day

UPDATE at 6/8/08 6:03:27 pm:

I’m not sure why these “activists” are so upset about the Brown Note. After all, one of their slogans is “Just Poop.”

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401 comments

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1 Racer X  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:46:20pm

No shit?

2 Fat Jolly Penguin  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:47:16pm

Is this what we did to the Obamatons today?

3 goddessoftheclassroom  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:47:50pm

This is a conspiracy theory they can run with...

4 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:48:00pm

Well - as "Full of It" as some are - It might be a Welcome Relief!

-S-

5 jaunte  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:48:16pm

If you're full of it, it's something to fear.

6 jaunte  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:48:46pm

re: #4 Dr. Shalit

Ha! Quickdraw.

7 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:06pm

This is so funny. I only wish it was true. I'd gladly volunteer (after purging) to stand among the lefties and blast that brown note.

Of course, I'd have a nose plug.

8 yochanan  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:06pm

if this were really true no one would notice as MOONBATUS are not known to bathe and the smell would be no different than the normal oder coming from a wild MOONBATUS

this is almost as funny as the name of the head of the world health org dept. on A.I.D.S/H.I.V. Kevin De Cock

9 Killgore Trout  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:28pm

Somebody needs to watch mythbusters.

10 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:35pm

I wonder if they are justifying their own bowel behavior when frightened by the police?

11 MarkX  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:41pm

re: #1 Racer X

No shit?

No, shit!

12 Timbre  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:48pm

Goes with their brown shirts and jackboots, MAAAAN! Yeah, MAAAAN!
/obvious sarcasm

13 Irene NYC  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:49pm

Why are they upset? Aren't they always going around saying, "Just p**p!" This way, they'll have some help.

14 Slumbering Behemoth  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:49:59pm

No special equipment is needed to get moonbats to shit themselves.

15 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:01pm

haha. Southpark scares protestors!

16 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:12pm

re: #6 jaunte

Ha! Quickdraw.

Jaunte -

I'm still hugging myself after eating the Milk-Bone I stole from MELECH!

-S-

17 tommygum  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:19pm

How would they know? They shit themselves regularly anyway.

18 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:21pm

"Sounds paranoid?"

If you have to ask, it probably is.

19 MarkX  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:25pm

re: #9 Killgore Trout

Somebody needs to watch mythbusters.

Shhhhhhhh!

Keeping 'em believing. LOL.

20 Ojoe  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:36pm

A note of color,

obviously superior to white noise.

21 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:55pm

If the Brown Note is the question ... Depends is the answer.

22 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:50:59pm

re: #15 simonml

Denver should have a Cartman-wannabe patrolling the streets for hippies.

23 Shiplord Kirel  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:51:00pm

I didn't think moonbats were especially concerned with this kind of thing, given their contempt for toilet paper and other bourgeois affectations.

(I can tell already that this is going to a snark-string of historic dimensions)

24 MarkX  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:51:09pm

Why do I have a feeling this thread will be a Sunday night classic.

25 Racer X  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:51:11pm

re: #9 Killgore Trout

Somebody needs to watch mythbusters.

Heh, I saw that episode.

26 Bill Amos  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:51:14pm

Its a conspiracy I tell ya to cover up Moonbats having involuntary bowl movements when confronted with facts and the truth !

27 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:51:26pm

re: #15 simonml

haha. Southpark scares protestors!

"Kyle? What are you doing Kyle?"

28 Spiny Norman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:51:36pm

re: #9 Killgore Trout

Somebody needs to watch mythbusters.

Heh. Like a couple of dopes who commented on the article.

29 BigPapa  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:51:45pm

OMFG, I just about crapped when I read that.

So funny.

30 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:02pm

re: #26 Bill Amos

Its a conspiracy I tell ya to cover up Moonbats having involuntary bowl movements when confronted with facts and the truth !

BOWL Movements ... too funny. Does this happen when they come begging for food, bowl in hands?

31 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:24pm

Pardon me, I have to use the eponymous facility.

32 nyc redneck  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:32pm

isn't that pooetic. they are going to blame their weak bowels on the cops.

33 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:37pm

With the granola crowd, this could get really messy.

34 solomonpanting  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:43pm

the Brown Note is an infrasonic frequency believed to resonate through human body parts and cause a loss of bowel control.

This just blows me away. Another case of the sh*t hitting the fan.

35 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:47pm

re: #31 The Other Les

Number two?

36 yochanan  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:56pm

might be the normal reaction of MOONBATUS when they meet up with ROLLING THUNDER scaring the shit out of them.

37 Racer X  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:52:58pm

I can see the anarchists pamphlets now:

Reminder! Everyone do #2 prior to the meet-up outside the convention center at 2pm.

38 Killgore Trout  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:53:05pm

Why do the cops need to spend all this money? To protect the Dems from the radical leftists. They will have to spend just as much (if not more) for the republican convention. Why? To protect us from radical leftists.
Progressive leftists are a a drain on society.

39 Bloodnok  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:53:08pm

Is this what Eddie Van Halen means by "Brown Sound"?

40 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:53:22pm

The Brown Noise video

It didn't work for me. I even sat on the potty before listening just in case

41 Timbre  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:53:25pm

Brown delivers.

42 Spiny Norman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:53:38pm

re: #23 Shiplord Kirel

I didn't think moonbats were especially concerned with this kind of thing, given their contempt for toilet paper and other bourgeois affectations.

(I can tell already that this is going to a snark-string of historic dimensions)

Ya mean like this:

Beware the dreaded Brown Note.

Racist!

43 freetoken  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:54:06pm

Hmmm... I suppose they could use HAARP to amplify it and affect the whole state of Colorado if needed...

On another note, I found a better link to the wonderful Obama Girls.

44 surrounded  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:54:09pm

I am anticipating the Brown Notes releasing their greatest hits this August.

45 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:54:36pm

I'm downwind of there but I feel confident the natural Denver smog will cover up the smell well enough.

46 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:54:38pm

re: #35 hermeneutics

Number two?

Yes.

47 Spiny Norman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:54:52pm

re: #38 Killgore Trout

Why do the cops need to spend all this money? To protect the Dems from the radical leftists. They will have to spend just as much (if not more) for the republican convention. Why? To protect us from radical leftists.
Progressive leftists are a a drain on society.

Recreate '68!

48 AZfederalist  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:54:55pm

We can only hope, eh?

As others have said, nobody will be able to tell anyway as this will be the normal reaction of most modern-day moonbats when facing the police anyway.

49 MarkX  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:55:04pm

If you're going to Denver
Be sure to bring some toilet paper
If you're going to Denver
You're gonna meet some stinky people there

For those who come to Denver
Summertime will be a shit-in there
In the streets of Denver
Stinky people with stains in their pants

All across the nation such a strange vibration
People in motion
There's a whole generation with a new explanation
People in motion people in motion

-with apologizes to Scott McKenzie

50 yochanan  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:55:06pm

according to the new york slime it seems that NON TYPICAL WHITE PEOPLE in africa are being murdered by TYPICAL BLACK PEOPLE because witch docs are say albino's body parts can bring good luck
seems that the islamic world isn't the only place stuck back in the 7th century.

51 Spiny Norman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:55:28pm

re: #41 Timbre

Brown delivers.

What can Brown do for you?

52 solomonpanting  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:55:56pm
Activists also prognosticate that Denver will dispatch the mother of all less-lethal weapons — a microwave ray gun said to cause a burning sensation in the skin. The Pentagon hasn't used the system in Iraq, lest it be accused of torture. Lefty activists speculate that Raytheon is seeking to test a limited-range civilian version for domestic crowd control in Denver this summer.

A companion to the previously cited Colorado Crapper.

53 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:03pm

re: #50 yochanan

That's more of a Stone Age thing there.

54 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:09pm

The military hasn't been able to widely deploy the ADA (Area Denial System) [Link: en.wikipedia.org...] because some are afraid it might hurt people.

I don't think they understand that the alternative is a bunch of really tense guys with automatic weapons.

There are a several crowd dispersal systems in the labs but the Denver Police aren't likely to have them available.

Tear gas works.

55 Jack Reacher  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:18pm

What a load of crap. Which, incidentally, is what they're expecting to hear at their protests.

56 Timbre  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:29pm

re: #40 simonml

This has been a test of the emergency browncast system. If this had been an actual emergency, you would have been instructed to take your Lomotil.

57 itellu3times  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:30pm

Supposed to be around 6hz, and there *might* be something to it.

58 Mich-again  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:42pm

Just like diarrhea, conspiracy theories run in their jeans genes...

59 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:44pm

re: #56 Timbre

This has been a test of the emergency browncast system. If this had been an actual emergency, you would have been instructed to take your Lomotil.

lol

60 Racer X  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:45pm

Well, we found out the mystery of the urinal turd .

61 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:48pm

re: #49 MarkX

-with apologizes to Scott McKenzie

Okay, now let's have that apology to the rest of us. ;)

62 Killian Bundy  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:51pm

Well, acoustic weapons do exist.

/after all, an ultra-low (ULF) frequency weapon caused the Minneapolis bridge collapse

63 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:56:53pm

Denver PD doesn't need to go high-tech. They can just send in the fleet.

64 RTLM  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:57:04pm

Bring your gas mask.

65 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:57:31pm

re: #36 yochanan

might be the normal reaction of MOONBATUS when they meet up with ROLLING THUNDER scaring the shit out of them.

If you've been standing nearby a 100 or so Harleys rolling by... You feel as much as hear.

66 BigJohn  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:57:44pm

I'm saddened, shocked, and deeply disappointed.

67 stevieray  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:57:47pm

Use Fleet enemas! Purify yourself before the march! Beat "the man" to the punch!

68 rabidfox  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:57:53pm

It will also cover for all the substandard food that will be floating around.

69 venjanz  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:00pm

Don't these guys watch Mythbusters?

[Link: www.meyersound.com.au...]

70 David IV of Georgia  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:08pm

So the Denver Police are going to get sued for skidmarks?

I hope they have good clerks and judges in Denver that will just roll their eyes and drop the suit in the trash with an admonishment to not waste people's time.

71 BigPapa  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:22pm

The Recreate68ers are worried about shitting their pants like a bunch of children. How about not acting like children and subjecting themselves to said pants shitting ray gun.

72 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:30pm

JUST POOP!

73 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:34pm

I recall when some leftist left some toxic chemicals in a rest room in a McDonald's on the day of an anti-genetic engineering riot in Minneapolis.

74 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:38pm

re: #26 Bill Amos

Its a conspiracy I tell ya to cover up Moonbats having involuntary bowl movements when confronted with facts and the truth !

"Famous" -

Moonbats don't POOP when confronted with facts/truth, rather they:

a. Try To Change the Subject.

b. Yell, scream and go into TERMINAL "BDS" MODE

c. STFU, or

d. Leave the Premises

"FOUR NOTES" - Just Like Beethoven's 5th Symphony, it is a piece of work.

-S-

75 theparson  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:42pm

OK, gonna weigh in here real quick...

Ummm... what?!

Best I could do. Ice Road Truckers season opener in 3 minutes.
Courage.
Change.
Good night, Mrs Callabash... where ever you are.

76 Dianna  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:51pm

re: #57 itellu3times

The mythbusters tried it, and nothing happened.

77 solomonpanting  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:58:55pm
Sounds paranoid?
Maybe. But Mayor John Hickenlooper's administration is only fueling conspiracy theories by refusing to disclose what equipment it's buying with $18 million in federal money. Even after being sued last week, the city insists on keeping its list a secret.

Porta potties.

78 Macker  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:14pm

re: #51 Spiny Norman

Ari, that's not you is it?

79 Capitalistincharge  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:19pm

Liberalism is a mental disorder......anymore questions?

80 The Shadow Do  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:36pm

Thousands of loons doing the quick step duck walk...too much fun

81 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:39pm

re: #76 Dianna

Did they eat a few hours prior to their experiment?

82 Killgore Trout  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:40pm

Pain Ray
"Engage."

83 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:46pm

Will there be protesters with signs that say "Just Poop"? Wouldn't those be redundant?

84 darkpixel  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:51pm

I can see it on the Denver PD checklist:

Rubber Hose
Menacing Dog
Big Poop Inducing Sound Machine....

---
Most cops, contrary to what some believe, are pretty smart. Certainly smart enough to know that arresting a bunch of protesters with 'dirty drawers' would be messy... Maybe in Denver they could use the "cramp and feel urgent, but don't defecate" note?

85 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 5:59:52pm

re: #79 Capitalistincharge

Liberalism is a mental disorder......anymore questions?

No shit.

86 Racer X  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:00:02pm

I think I might set up a booth selling Grampers™ to the anarchists. With lots of literature on the brown note weapons.

Hey, a fellow can still make a buck in the USA right?

87 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:00:19pm

re: #72 Salem

JUST POOP!

Beat me by a mere 16 seconds.

88 kywrite  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:00:25pm

You can't make this shit up.

89 Spiny Norman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:00:26pm

re: #30 hermeneutics

BOWL Movements ... too funny. Does this happen when they come begging for food, bowl in hands?

Change?

90 Shiplord Kirel  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:00:36pm

re: #79 Capitalistincharge

Liberalism is a mental disorder......anymore questions?


Soon to be an intestinal disorder as well.

91 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:00:37pm

POONAMI! RUUUUUN!

92 Celtic Templar  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:09pm

Reminds me of the scene in apocalypse now - I love the smell of !&^t in the morning:

Youtube Video

(One of the best scenes in a lefty movie ever)

93 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:12pm

re: #88 kywrite

You can't make this shit up.

But can you make it come out?

94 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:14pm

Oh wait, that was gross...

95 itellu3times  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:16pm

re: #76 Dianna

The mythbusters tried it, and nothing happened.

Well it's not likely to be a single fixed frequency, and you'd have to put in a fair amount of amplitude ... but I've never been able to make that hand-in-warm-water bit work, either.

96 ypnxjkb  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:24pm

The Brown note? Obama is black not brown. I don't get it, does he have some mexican in him we don't know about, and why would the DNC nominate a person that would make people get a case of the loose butt? Don't they know moonbats can't use toilet paper due to tree guilt.

97 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:25pm

Who would clean up all that?

98 Jack Reacher  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:36pm

The audacity of poop.

99 DistantThunder  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:43pm

Don't breed with these people. It is inhumane to produce a child with this DNA.

100 kywrite  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:44pm

The husband wants to know if this would make them incontinent malcontents.

101 Spiny Norman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:01:47pm

re: #78 Macker

Ari, that's not you is it?

Ari? No. I've always been the hedgehog guy.

102 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:06pm

re: #93 simonml

But can you make it come out?

The DPD can.

103 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:23pm

re: #100 kywrite

I loved that!

104 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:31pm

re: #94 Salem

Oh wait, that was gross...

But, funny nonetheless.

105 AZfederalist  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:38pm

re: #84 darkpixel

I think you've got something there. Cops having to handle, so to speak, those people would face a bio-hazard of epic proportions were such a device to be employed. Even if they didn't arrest the messy hippies, the city and its citizens would similarly face that same bio-hazard.

/they're called "sanitary sewers" for a reason

106 eon  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:43pm

Or maybe they've finally realized that all that macrobiotic brown rice they've been scarfing down all these years will come back to haunt them- with something a bit more extreme than regularity?

/Metamucil is much easier on the GI tract

cheers

eon

107 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:46pm

Who better to test the theory on though, eh?

108 Macker  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:47pm

re: #101 Spiny Norman

Ari? No. I've always been the hedgehog guy.

OK. There's a guy on my blog who posts with that name.

109 jaunte  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:51pm

re: #82 Killgore Trout

What is that system called, officially?

110 Racer X  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:53pm

Go Lakers!

111 Mich-again  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:02:55pm

The most ridiculous line in that whole story, and thats saying a lot..

Unless, of course, it's true.
112 BigPapa  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:03:03pm

re: #40 simonml

The Brown Noise video

It didn't work for me. I even sat on the potty before listening just in case

Try sticking a speaker up your butt. I'll bet it works then.

113 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:03:34pm

Brownshirts, brownpants.

114 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:03:47pm

re: #112 BigPapa

Is this why they call you, "Big?"

115 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:03:48pm

re: #100 kywrite

The husband wants to know if this would make them incontinent malcontents.

DING! DING! DING!

We have a winnah!

116 MarkX  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:05pm

re: #92 Celtic Templar

(One of The best scenes in a lefty movie ever)

117 Capitalistincharge  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:05pm

re: #99 DistantThunder
LOLOLOLROTFLMAOLOL....laughed so hard the dog started barking.

118 Inquisitive  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:15pm

re: #40 simonml

The Brown Noise video

It didn't work for me. I even sat on the potty before listening just in case


Didn't work on me either, Must just work on Demo Moonbats, so I just passed the Brown test.

119 Charles  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:19pm

Just poop!

120 Bill Amos  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:20pm
BOWL Movements ... too funny. Does this happen when they come begging for food, bowl in hands?

Heh well at least I only had a brain fart and not a brown note. Should have read bowel not bowl

121 ec marm  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:25pm

I don't know, maybe in the rarefied atmosphere of Denver the sound waves will have less oxygen molecules to push against. When they strike the lower bowel the effect could be amplified.
&#9834 Takin' it to the sheets &#9834

/

122 kywrite  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:41pm

re: #103 hermeneutics

It is still hurting my head to put those words together. Like the wrong ends of magnets.

123 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:44pm

re: #100 kywrite

Get your husband to register on LGF. We need his sly humor!

124 Killgore Trout  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:54pm

re: #109 jaunte

Active Denial System

125 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:04:56pm

re: #107 Salem

Who better to test the theory on though, eh?

Hamas.

126 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:05:31pm

re: #112 BigPapa

Try sticking a speaker up your butt. I'll bet it works then.

I'm giggling wildly!

127 greenmiler  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:05:39pm

the Brown Note is a familiar tone also known as the Porcelain Echo..OR it is what you find on your door when you missed the UPS package

128 Mars Needs Neocons  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:05:45pm

Ok, I've decided, the only way to get through to these loons is to speak their language. I think I can get them to drop Obama.

Moonbats listen, Obama is not who you think. He is a mutant clone of Dick Cheney and Bill Cosby, with a bit of Dumbo thrown in (just because Cheney is such a sick, sadistic bastard). He was created with hypnotic powers to convince you he is the right person. He will take office then reveal that he is appointing George W. Bush, President for life.

(He also went back in time and was on the Grassy KNoll.


/tinfoil hat off.

129 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:05:55pm

re: #119 Charles

Oh, what a riot -- I remember that image. Too funny.

130 Killian Bundy  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:05:58pm

re: #40 simonml

The Brown Noise video

It didn't work for me. I even sat on the potty before listening just in case

/the cat didn't like that one bit

131 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:05:59pm

re: #119 Charles

Just poop!

Wow, a whopping 204 comments! Those were quaint times.

132 stevieray  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:06:09pm

I hope the recreate '68 radicals don't think of using Depends... it would suck if all that glorious crowd control technology was rendered moot due to nappies.

I really, really, really wanna see video of radical anarchists attacking the barricades in adult diapers... in living color... on all the newschannels. Please give me this small gift. Its not too much to ask!

133 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:06:31pm

re: #113 Van Helsing

Brownshirts, brownpants.

ROFLMAO!

134 mama winger  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:06:44pm

These people are too stupid to breathe in and out on their own.

135 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:06:45pm

re: #130 Killian Bundy

/the cat didn't like that one bit

My dog barks when I play that frequency only teens can hear. Scares him quite a bit.

136 jaunte  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:06:53pm

re: #124 Killgore Trout

Interesting. Here's some more info:
[Link: www.globalsecurity.org...]

137 solomonpanting  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:06:53pm

re: #121 ec marm

I like your musical embellishments. Are they found on the Brown Note Label?

138 AZfederalist  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:07:01pm

re: #126 MandyManners

Hmmm, that's not the kind of reaction one would expect to that.

/tmi

139 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:07:09pm

re: #125 MandyManners

Hamas.

Oh, pffft, of course! And they would suffer far more embarrassment of their "manhood".

140 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:07:29pm

Could you imagine slipping and falling?

141 HelloDare  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:07:35pm

The government has been testing the device out by aiming it at Keith Olbermann's head.

142 Charles  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:07:45pm

Change ... my underpants!

143 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:07:52pm

Will they be changing Recreate 68 to Defecate 68?

144 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:07:53pm

re: #138 AZfederalist

Hmmm, that's not the kind of reaction one would expect to that.

/tmi

ROFLMAO!

145 Timbre  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:01pm

re: #84 darkpixel

"I can see it on the Denver PD ch
Rubber Hose
Menacing Dog
Big Poop Inducing Sound Machine...."

Don't forget the milk and molasses.

146 nyc redneck  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:05pm

these fools aren't even potty trained and they want to take over our country.

147 kywrite  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:17pm

re: #123 hermeneutics

When I get him, the computer, and an open sluice all at the same time, he's getting nagged to do so.

He says he is flattered (while dancing with our daughter his tiny clone to Karma Chameleon, of all things. He likes ABBA too.)

148 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:17pm

re: #141 HelloDare

The government has been testing the device out by aiming it at Keith Olbermann's head.

But KO is already empty headed.

149 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:28pm

re: #142 Charles

Change ... my underpants!

Depends.

150 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:28pm

re: #139 Salem

Oh, pffft, of course! And they would suffer far more embarrassment of their "manhood".

Manhood? They ain't got any of those.

151 Inquisitive  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:29pm

re: #84 darkpixel

I can see it on the Denver PD checklist:

Rubber Hose
Menacing Dog
Big Poop Inducing Sound Machine....

---
Most cops, contrary to what some believe, are pretty smart. Certainly smart enough to know that arresting a bunch of protesters with 'dirty drawers' would be messy... Maybe in Denver they could use the "cramp and feel urgent, but don't defecate" note?


ROFL--laughing so hard I can hardly see to type

152 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:40pm

re: #142 Charles

You'll have to do that yourself. :)

153 Da_Beerfreak  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:41pm

My advice to the moonbats is don't take any chances that the nonexistence of the 'Brown Note' is Right-wing disinformation that is intended to leave one unprepared for an attack by this Evil Weapon.

Bring your own supply of Depends™ and be willing to share with others.

A little thinking and planing will help one keep their shit together.

154 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:44pm

Handing out free spring water mixed with ExLax would really work.

155 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:49pm

re: #134 mama winger

These people are too stupid to breathe in and out on their own.

That's why they have headphones/earbuds - breath in, breath out...

156 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:08:57pm

re: #141 HelloDare

The government has been testing the device out by aiming it at Keith Olbermann's head.

That explains the shit he spews from his mouth.

157 Macker  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:09:18pm

re: #128 Mars Needs Neocons

Maybe he's from the House of Cosbys....

158 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:09:21pm

You know what? Just zap 'em with a clue-ray. Everyone is better off.

159 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:09:29pm

Racism!

160 solomonpanting  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:09:45pm

Obamatrons reporting for doodies.

161 jaunte  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:09:54pm

Here's a link for everyone's next online argument:
[Link: www.flickr.com...]

162 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:08pm

I don't think I've laughed this much on LGF--or, IRL--in ages.

Thank you for this thread, Charles!

163 BigPapa  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:16pm

re: #114 hermeneutics

Is this why they call you, "Big?"

I move quite deftly for a big man. Though, with a speaker up my butt blasting a brown note.... could be a crappy situation.

I've had tears for the last 20 minutes on this thread. I'm laughing almost as bad as the first time I watched Dumb and Dumber, especially the toilet scene with Jeff Daniels.

164 greenmiler  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:28pm

I'm sorry, ...."Diarrhea was an inside job!"

165 David IV of Georgia  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:28pm

So the "badge of honor" at this Democratic convention won't be a baton bruise on the head or wrists cut by a sadistic cop's handcuffs, but soiled pants? But maybe that fourth hotdog was a little ripe...

166 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:34pm

re: #158 Salem

You know what? Just zap 'em with a clue-ray. Everyone is better off.

And have raging clues all over the place?

167 nyc redneck  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:36pm

what are under pants?

168 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:36pm

We could be really, really evil and LOCK the port-a-potties near the convention.

169 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:37pm

Wonder what a "Whitey Note" frequency does?

170 Killgore Trout  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:39pm

re: #136 jaunte


According to reports, a 2-second burst from the system can heat the skin to a temperature of 130° F. At 50 °C, the pain reflex makes people pull away automatically in less than a second. Someone would have to stay in the beam for 250 seconds before it burnt the skin,

Despite the sensation, the technology does not cause injury because of the low energy levels used.


Nifty!

171 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:10:58pm

re: #150 MandyManners

Manhood? They ain't got any of those.

But they think they do, and that's their most treasured delusion. Essentially, that is Allah.

172 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:11:14pm

Maybe we'll get lucky and the power of suggestion alone will cause people to crap their pants

173 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:11:17pm

Is it OK to post a link to a place that has a Zappa online radio show? I don't have any commercial connection (or potential).

174 Mike P  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:11:36pm

If the technology actually existed, the city of Denver could recoup the entire cost by selling DVDs of its deployment and use to Republicans for $100 each.

175 FrogMarch  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:11:41pm

.... considering George Bush is to blame for their constipation -- maybe this will be a blessing in disguise.

176 loflyer  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:11:57pm

Seriously there are commercial sound transducers on the market that are mounted on civilian ships to defend against the upsurge of piracy world wide. These sound transducer make who ever the thing is pointed at feel "very uncomfortable" and has been used successfully several times to break up a pirate attack. I'll look for some links to the device.....

177 opnion  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:11:57pm

Well I always thought that the Denver police would use some serious shit against them.

178 Roentgen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:12:04pm

They need to learn about Brown 25.

179 Timbre  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:12:16pm

Denver PD can tell the defecators to "SCAT!"

180 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:12:20pm

re: #163 BigPapa

I move quite deftly for a big man. Though, with a speaker up my butt blasting a brown note.... could be a crappy situation.

I've had tears for the last 20 minutes on this thread. I'm laughing almost as bad as the first time I watched Dumb and Dumber, especially the toilet scene with Jeff Daniels.

What about the franks and beans scene in that movie with Ben Stiller?

181 jaunte  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:12:41pm

re: #170 Killgore Trout

Worst you get is an 'owie.'
It would be handy for cruiseships off Somalia.

182 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:12:46pm

re: #167 nyc redneck

what are under pants?

Bits and pieces.

183 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:12:50pm

re: #180 MandyManners

What about the franks and beans scene in that movie with Ben Stiller?

Is it the beans or the frank? lol

184 Spiny Norman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:12:54pm

re: #108 Macker

OK. There's a guy on my blog who posts with that name.

::gasp::

An imposter!

In 2003-2004 there was someone using that nic at DemocraticUnderground. I got some pretty odd questions.

185 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:13:04pm

re: #169 So?

Wonder what a "Whitey Note" frequency does?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

186 Midwestprof  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:13:10pm

I want the Pampers franchise.

187 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:13:41pm

re: #171 Salem

But they think they do, and that's their most treasured delusion. Essentially, that is Allah.

I wonder what their names for their penises are.

188 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:08pm

re: #174 Mike P

If the technology actually existed, the city of Denver could recoup the entire cost by selling DVDs of its deployment and use to Republicans for $100 each.

I'd buy a dozen.

189 solomonpanting  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:10pm

The Dem Convention will be in the dead of summer. I fear a Brownout.

190 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:10pm

re: #180 MandyManners

You mean "There's something about Mary"?

/eww

191 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:11pm

re: #166 MandyManners

And have raging clues all over the place?

Hey, that's a South Park reference.

192 Render  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:14pm

Ben Yager.

Unconventional Action Denver.

[Link: www.unconventionalaction.org...]

Obamatons?

JUST
STINK,
R

193 Geepers  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:18pm

This is a serious story about the stifling of political dissent by a fascist government and all you people can do is make jokes?

194 BigJohn  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:23pm

Did you notice who didn't fire in yesterday's Belmont Stakes?

Big Brown

195 Bloodnok  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:24pm

re: #173 Van Helsing

Is it OK to post a link to a place that has a Zappa online radio show? I don't have any commercial connection (or potential).

Well, as the thread suggests, Brown Shoes Don't Make It.

196 Jack Reacher  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:29pm

re: #187 MandyManners

I wonder what their names for their penises are.


Penises? How many do they have?

197 goddessoftheclassroom  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:14:41pm

re: #135 simonml

My dog barks when I play that frequency only teens can hear. Scares him quite a bit.

My students tested me with that sound and were vastly amused when I couldn't hear it.

198 Roentgen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:00pm

If an aluminum foil hat will protect a moonbat's head from Martian Brain Control Waves, then does it not follow that an aluminum pants suit would do the same to protect them from Big Brown Note?

199 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:14pm

re: #183 simonml

Is it the beans or the frank? lol

I reckon jeans with buttons are good things.

200 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:21pm

re: #176 loflyer

Seriously there are commercial sound transducers on the market that
are mounted on civilian ships to defend against the upsurge of piracy
world wide. These sound transducer make who ever the thing is pointed
at feel "very uncomfortable" and has been used successfully several
times to break up a pirate attack. I'll look for some links to the
device.....

That system uses higher modulated frequencies to make one wish they were elsewhere.

[Link: en.wikipedia.org...]

201 goddessoftheclassroom  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:30pm

re: #186 Midwestprof

I want the Pampers franchise.

It all Depends...

202 nyc redneck  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:34pm

enforce the pooper scooper laws. if they don't pick up after themselves.

203 swamprat  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:35pm

obligatory link

204 Silhouette  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:45pm

re: #194 BigJohn

Did you notice who didn't fire in yesterday's Belmont Stakes?

Big Brown

It's a conspiracy, I tells ya.

And I've heard that UPS is one of the official shippers of the DNC.

It gets deeper and deeper. The conspiracy, I mean.

205 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:48pm

re: #190 mitthrawnurdo

You mean "There's something about Mary"?

/eww

That's it! Thanks!

206 Midwestprof  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:49pm

re: #197 goddessoftheclassroom

My students tested me with that sound and were vastly amused when I couldn't hear it.

Hell, I can't hear my students half the time.

207 eon  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:54pm

re: #176 loflyer

Seriously there are commercial sound transducers on the market that are mounted on civilian ships to defend against the upsurge of piracy world wide. These sound transducer make who ever the thing is pointed at feel "very uncomfortable" and has been used successfully several times to break up a pirate attack. I'll look for some links to the device.....

Try this;

How LRAD Works

cheers

eon

208 Ringo the Gringo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:15:59pm

U.S. Military Is Seeking Ultimate "Stink Bomb"


The task: to develop an odor so universally repulsive it would be considered unbearable by people from all cultures. That's the challenge the U.S. Department of Defense has presented to scientists at the Monell Chemical Senses Center in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

The military wants to use the odor to control crowds and deter people from restricted areas, according to psychologist Pamela Dalton, who studies the development of odor preferences at Monell...

209 sadhu  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:16:01pm

not that there was any doubt, but the threads today sure show ya who in the world has the best wit and humor

LIZARDS!

210 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:16:02pm

re: #187 MandyManners

Isn't the proper term "penii"?

Anyways, no clue, but I'm guessing "Princess Leia", "Stubby", and "Be-header".

211 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:16:09pm

re: #191 Salem

Hey, that's a South Park reference.

Hardy Boys!

212 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:16:18pm

re: #199 MandyManners

I reckon jeans with buttons are good things.

I recently tore through a pair of boxers with a zipper fly. Makes you think. I'm extra careful now, especially after a few drinks

213 Silhouette  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:16:36pm

re: #208 Ringo the Gringo

Patcholli?

214 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:16:46pm

re: #193 Geepers

This is a serious story about the stifling of political dissent by a fascist government and all you people can do is make jokes?

We're just mean little shits.

215 hermeneutics  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:16:57pm

re: #176 loflyer

We could pool our money and buy a tranducer as recommended by LoFlyer. Then, near the convention center, we could LOCK the potties as we play the frequency. Double whammy.

216 opnion  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:17:02pm

re: #187 MandyManners

I wonder what their names for their penises are.


Little Elvis

217 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:17:13pm

re: #196 Jack Reacher

Penises? How many do they have?

One per, I hope.

218 David Simon  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:17:20pm

Don't use this device around Obama or there will be more drownings than Katrina.

219 The Other Les  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:17:23pm

re: #213 Silhouette

Patcholli?



GAS! GAS! GAS!

(Puts on gas mask.)

220 Mars Needs Neocons  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:17:33pm

re: #157 Macker

Maybe he's from the House of Cosbys....

That's just wrong. lol

221 ted  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:17:39pm

Does this mean I can throw out all my Fleet Enemas ?

222 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:17:47pm

re: #109 jaunte

What is that system called, officially?

Jaunte -

Don't Know - AND - it should be called the "POOPTICATOR!"

-S-

223 Inquisitive  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:02pm

re: #162 MandyManners

I don't think I've laughed this much on LGF--or, IRL--in ages.

Thank you for this thread, Charles!

Mandy I was thinking the same thing just having a hard time typing it. Have had to retype these two lines several times.

224 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:03pm

re: #205 MandyManners

You're welcome, but the only reason I remember it was because Cameron Diaz is in it, and I have an undying hatred of her for several reasons. First, she seems to love Che and Uncle Fidel, also, she implores us little folk to conserve resources while she jets around, owns several mansions, and imports water from France to wash her face (she doesn't trust the LA water).

/I wouldn't either, but regardless.

225 stevieray  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:11pm

re: #198 Roentgen

If an aluminum foil hat will protect a moonbat's head from Martian Brain Control Waves, then does it not follow that an aluminum pants suit would do the same to protect them from Big Brown Note?

All purpose protection, for uncertain times!

226 sadhu  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:13pm

potty humor, always a favorite in my family for generations

227 Roentgen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:19pm

"Brown note" sounds like a phrase fifth grade males can't say without cracking-up. Goddessoftheclassroom, am I right?

228 snowcrash  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:25pm

Kaopectate-coladas, the official drink of the DNC 08 Denver.

229 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:30pm

re: #210 mitthrawnurdo

Isn't the proper term "penii"?

Anyways, no clue, but I'm guessing "Princess Leia", "Stubby", and "Be-header".

It's penises or penes. I looked it up ages ago.

230 guzziguy  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:34pm

re: #14 Slumbering Behemoth

No special equipment is needed to get moonbats to shit themselves.

Just have a squad of marines jog by. That'll do it.

231 Render  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:36pm

re: #176 loflyer

Stratpage, my friend, Stratpage.

GOTTA
BOLT,
R

232 eon  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:18:49pm

re: #187 MandyManners

I wonder what their names for their penises are.

The Light at the Center of the Universe?

cheers

eon

233 Killgore Trout  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:05pm

re: #173 Van Helsing

Go for it.

234 Midwestprof  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:08pm

re: #213 Silhouette

Patcholli?

Patchoulli! Tha's another franchise I would like to have for the Denver "event."

235 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:13pm

re: #212 simonml

I recently tore through a pair of boxers with a zipper fly. Makes you think. I'm extra careful now, especially after a few drinks

I had a boyfriend do that once. He didn't seem to appreciate my hysterical laughter.

236 jaunte  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:15pm

Denver protestors exhibited a form of random 'brownian motion.'

237 greenmiler  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:37pm

If I invented this I would shape the trigger into a big finger to pull!

238 AZfederalist  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:37pm

re: #167 nyc redneck

Wanna re-consider that question?

239 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:39pm

re: #229 MandyManners

Perhaps GotC would know..

/sorry, I couldn't resist!

240 Idle Drifter  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:44pm

re: #193 Geepers

This is a serious story about the stifling of political dissent by a fascist government and all you people can do is make jokes?

Hey, Geepers, I guess the shit has hit the fan when Obama was selected as the Democrat nominee for POTUS and this wild fear amongst the Moonbats that Government Forces might disrupt their fun of burning Denver to the ground with new fangled less-than-lethal weapons has them shitting their pants. I guess we have no choice but to make poop jokes.

241 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:19:51pm

I can't take anymore of this shit! Gimme my tin foil hat.

242 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:06pm

re: #209 sadhu

LIZARDS!

Not so fast!

243 Silhouette  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:12pm

Has anyone read Lileks' book, Mommy Knows Best?

He has a whole chapter dedicated to the 1930s or 40s or sometime, when apparently, the number one concern of all parents all the time was constipation.

They needed this ray.

244 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:23pm

re: #233 Killgore Trout

Go for it.

[Link: radiofreephoenix.com...]

Click through to now playing. It's a weekly show with Zappa stuff.

245 JWM  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:26pm

So they're going to experiment with the Brown Note Automatic Poop Yer Pants machine, the Microwave Skin-Fry-O-Matic, and all sorts of other space age stuff that the CIA bought from ACME Enterprises.
And use the Moonbats as guinea pigs to test it all.

Doesn't get cooler than that.

JWM

246 Jack Reacher  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:31pm

Obama delegate prepares for Denver.

247 HelloDare  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:37pm

re: #221 ted

Does this mean I can throw out all my Fleet Enemas ?

And what's with the Boston Celtics playing in the Fleet Center?

248 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:39pm

re: #243 Silhouette

Not polio? Interesting...

249 kywrite  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:44pm

re: #236 jaunte

Okay, that was great. Geeks rule!

250 jamgarr  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:45pm

You just can't make this sh*t up.

251 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:46pm

re: #216 opnion

Little Elvis

Is there a Heart-Break Hotel in Gaza?

252 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:20:59pm

re: #246 Jack Reacher

Linky not working.

253 solomonpanting  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:05pm
#225 stevieray

re: #198 Roentgen

If an aluminum foil hat will protect a moonbat's head from Martian Brain Control Waves, then does it not follow that an aluminum pants suit would do the same to protect them from Big Brown Note?

All purpose protection, for uncertain times!

A new fashion line--The Reynolds Wrap

254 mudhen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:08pm

Now, wait a minute. Tesla had a device that caused people to poop. It had to do with vibrations coming from the floor. But he also had a cache of secret papers, that went missing after his death. He had hinted at a Death Ray, and other esoteric inventions.

Maybe the gov't is finally getting around to looking at his secret papers and has figured out a use for the Bowel Content Liquidator.

If we can get this rumor going strongly enough, any loud persistent tone will cause part of the crowd to poop, just from mass hysteria and suggestion.

Denver police, hope you are listening. Just a nice low tone. And make sure the cops wear masks and gloves. It will add to the effect.

255 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:22pm

re: #234 Midwestprof

Patchoulli! Tha's another franchise I would like to have for the Denver "event."

"MWP"

BONG, BONG, BONG, BONG, BONG - We Have a WINNAH!

-S-

256 Kenneth  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:32pm

Let me see if I've got this straight... the moonbats are worried the police (Thugs of Chimpy-Bushitler) will use the Brown Note on them to make them poop their pants?

Can you say Anal Retentive?

Yet more proof poor potty training causes liberals.

While we're on the topic, do you suppose the Denver Fire Department can give Al Gore an enema?

Jest asking...

257 simonml  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:34pm

re: #235 MandyManners

I had a boyfriend do that once. He didn't seem to appreciate my hysterical laughter.

I'd never forgive myself if something were to happen

258 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:41pm

re: #246 Jack Reacher

Obama delegate prepares for Denver.

"Problem loading page" AKA "Occupied".

259 Van Helsing  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:41pm

re: #237 greenmiler

If I invented this I would shape the trigger into a big finger to pull!

Too good! Damn, for serious stuff this sure has been fun.

260 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:21:44pm

re: #224 mitthrawnurdo

You're welcome, but the only reason I remember it was because Cameron Diaz is in it, and I have an undying hatred of her for several reasons. First, she seems to love Che and Uncle Fidel, also, she implores us little folk to conserve resources while she jets around, owns several mansions, and imports water from France to wash her face (she doesn't trust the LA water).

/I wouldn't either, but regardless.

There's nothing like a rich moonbat.

261 itellu3times  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:08pm

re: #254 mudhen

Now, wait a minute. Tesla had a device that caused people to poop.

By hitting them with 10,000,000 volts?

262 godfrey  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:12pm

Well, Hillary supporters are bummed..

263 Tigger2005  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:17pm

I wonder why they want to "Re-create 68" anyway? After all, their orgasmic Messiah already has the nom in the can. What's to protest?

264 BigPapa  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:22pm

re: #179 Timbre

Denver PD can tell the defecators to "SCAT!"

Funny shit!

265 ted  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:24pm

First video of Dreaded Brown Note Victim !

Youtube Video

266 BigJohn  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:26pm

Karl Rove, you sh!t starter.

267 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:29pm

re: #232 eon

The Light at the Center of the Universe?

cheers

eon

That was Mo's name for his for sure.

268 AZfederalist  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:30pm

re: #196 Jack Reacher

Well, let's see, if Obama picks Napolitono - that's one, if Janet Reno shows up, that's two, is Hillary showing up?

269 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:40pm

re: #254 mudhen

Isn't his Tesla-coil death ray used to blast UFOs?

270 Killgore Trout  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:41pm

re: #244 Van Helsing

Heh. I think they're playing Illinois Enema Bandit.

271 Shiplord Kirel  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:49pm

re: #254 mudhen

Now, wait a minute. Tesla had a device that caused people to poop. It had to do with vibrations coming from the floor. But he also had a cache of secret papers, that went missing after his death. He had hinted at a Death Ray, and other esoteric inventions.

Maybe the gov't is finally getting around to looking at his secret papers and has figured out a use for the Bowel Content Liquidator.

If we can get this rumor going strongly enough, any loud persistent tone will cause part of the crowd to poop, just from mass hysteria and suggestion.

Denver police, hope you are listening. Just a nice low tone. And make sure the cops wear masks and gloves. It will add to the effect.

Didn't Tesla do a lot of his experiments in Colorado Springs? Maybe they've unearthed some of the antique gear and refurbished it.

272 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:22:54pm

re: #263 Tigger2005

I wonder why they want to "Re-create 68" anyway? After all, their orgasmic Messiah already has the nom in the can. What's to protest?

It wobbles the mind.

273 snowcrash  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:14pm

Commemorative bumper sticker, Shit Happens DNC 08 Denver

274 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:15pm

re: #263 Tigger2005

What's to protest?

Because the status-quo is anathema to the left. Change follows when you kick up a crapstorm about something, ANYTHING.

275 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:25pm

re: #208 Ringo the Gringo

Just have Hillary fart, it'll be just as effective.

276 opnion  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:37pm

re: #224 mitthrawnurdo

You're welcome, but the only reason I remember it was because Cameron Diaz is in it, and I have an undying hatred of her for several reasons. First, she seems to love Che and Uncle Fidel, also, she implores us little folk to conserve resources while she jets around, owns several mansions, and imports water from France to wash her face (she doesn't trust the LA water).

/I wouldn't either, but regardless.


Ok, she is an idiot. Most unfortunate. She even told Oprah that George Bush would legalise rape. But damn, she was great in that movie.

277 Ojoe  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:37pm

Denver the pile high city

278 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:49pm

goddess ... are you in here?

279 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:50pm

re: #275 So?

Just have Hillary fart, it'll be just as effective.

"Barack, pull my finger".

280 Mich-again  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:57pm

If low frequency sound could make people lose control of their bowels than what explains the kids sitting at red lights with their cars rattling from the sub-woofers cranked up to 11 and yet their windows are rolled up?

281 Silhouette  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:57pm

re: #248 mitthrawnurdo

Not polio? Interesting...

He is just judging from the ads at the time.

If you judged us from our ads, future civilizations will conclude we were obsessed with odor.

282 Shiplord Kirel  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:23:58pm

If they use this inside the convention, the Rodents will have to go home for lack of talking points.

283 talon_262  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:13pm

re: #211 MandyManners

Hardy Boys!

No, that's the Hardly Boys!

;P

284 Jack Reacher  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:23pm

Correct link for Obama delegate preparing for Denver. DOH!

285 MandyManners  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:28pm

re: #254 mudhen

Now, wait a minute. Tesla had a device that caused people to poop. It had to do with vibrations coming from the floor. But he also had a cache of secret papers, that went missing after his death. He had hinted at a Death Ray, and other esoteric inventions.

Maybe the gov't is finally getting around to looking at his secret papers and has figured out a use for the Bowel Content Liquidator.

If we can get this rumor going strongly enough, any loud persistent tone will cause part of the crowd to poop, just from mass hysteria and suggestion.

Denver police, hope you are listening. Just a nice low tone. And make sure the cops wear masks and gloves. It will add to the effect.

Wicked!

286 goddessoftheclassroom  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:39pm

re: #239 mitthrawnurdo

Perhaps GotC would know..

/sorry, I couldn't resist!


pe·nis (pē'nĭs) n. pl. pe·nis·es or pe·nes (-nēz)

1676, perhaps from Fr. pénis or directly from L. penis "penis," earlier "tail" (cf. Eng. tail in both senses, the sexual one slang), from PIE *pes-/*pesos- "penis" (cf. Skt. pasas-, Gk. peos, posthe "penis," probably also O.E. fæsl "progeny, offspring," O.N. fösull, Ger. Fasel "young of animals, brood"). The proper plural is penes. The adj. is penial. In psychological writing, penis envy is attested from 1924.

287 Killian Bundy  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:41pm

No problem.

/Obama makes manure taste good

288 Geepers  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:42pm

Idle Drifter (#240),

In 30,000+ posts I've never used a /sarc tag. ;-)

289 Pianobuff  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:47pm

re: #277 Ojoe

Denver the pile high city


And home of the Nuggets..........

290 Kenneth  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:49pm

re: #271 Shiplord Kirel

Tesla's death ray was a microwave transmitter. Cooks you up real good.

291 David Simon  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:24:59pm

re: #277 Ojoe

Denver the pile high city

Major upding.

292 Bloodnok  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:25:00pm

It won't affect the anarchists since they don't give a sh-t about anything.

293 Midwestprof  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:25:31pm

re: #255 Dr. Shalit

"MWP"

BONG, BONG, BONG, BONG, BONG - We Have a WINNAH!

-S-

Bong? Dod you say Bong? And hookah. And zig-zags. And....

294 Timbre  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:25:35pm

Note to Denver C of C: Change slogan to the "Brown Mile City."

295 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:25:58pm

re: #276 opnion

Oh, I remember that. Her, that idiot Dru Barrymore, and (I guess) Lucy Lu spouted that crap. I think it was that a) they truly believed that and b) wanted publicity for that bomb of a movie known as Charlie's Angels - Full Throttle.

296 Ojoe  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:26:16pm

re: #291 David Simon

OK

BBL

Dinner, but shouldn't say that here.

297 mudhen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:26:22pm

re: #261 itellu3times

By hitting them with 10,000,000 volts?

No, apparently a plate that they stood on, vibrated. You know, like how an earthquake can turn loose soil into quicksand.

It's actually pretty funny, he'd get people up there on some pretext and turn it on. He was one twisted dude.

298 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:26:30pm

re: #289 Pianobuff

And home of the Nuggets..........

And where do you go to join the Mile High Club? The crapper.

299 ploome hineni[deleted]  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:26:37pm
300 nyc redneck  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:26:43pm

it would be sh*tty to be a dem.

301 greenmiler  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:27:02pm

someone could go there with a shopping cart full of Immodium, toilet paper, and corks and really 'clean up'....I can't believe I said that

302 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:27:23pm

re: #299 ploome hineni

what have I missed today?

It's been a crappy day.

303 nyc redneck  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:27:24pm

re: #296 Ojoe

OK

BBL

Dinner, but shouldn't say that here.

oh no, by all means, SHOUT IT.

304 mitthrawnurdo  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:27:25pm

re: #286 goddessoftheclassroom

Okay...thanks, lol.

305 ploome hineni[deleted]  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:27:49pm
306 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:27:54pm

re: #293 Midwestprof

Bong? Dod you say Bong? And hookah. And zig-zags. And....

"MWP" -

YUPP - ER's.

-S-

307 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:28:00pm

Man the pharmaceutical companies are scrambling to set up underground research facilities.

Especially, the ones that make anti-diarrhea medications.

308 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:28:12pm

re: #286 goddessoftheclassroom

Goddess -- I'm back in with a quick FYI for you.

Dogs never any trouble at Chinese laundries. You know what they say: "No tickee, no shirtee".

309 nyc redneck  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:28:14pm

re: #302 vbspurs

It's been a crappy day.

LOL.

310 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:28:38pm

re: #305 ploome hineni

what happened?

Fin hit the shan.

311 greenmiler  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:28:39pm

re: #286 goddessoftheclassroom

pe·nis (pē'nĭs) n. pl. pe·nis·es or pe·nes (-nēz)

1676, perhaps from Fr. pénis or directly from L. penis "penis," earlier "tail" (cf. Eng. tail in both senses, the sexual one slang), from PIE *pes-/*pesos- "penis" (cf. Skt. pasas-, Gk. peos, posthe "penis," probably also O.E. fæsl "progeny, offspring," O.N. fösull, Ger. Fasel "young of animals, brood"). The proper plural is penes. The adj. is penial. In psychological writing, penis envy is attested from 1924.


Are you aware of the penal codes on this site?

312 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:29:06pm

re: #279 vbspurs

I think he already did, during their "secret" meeting.

313 The Rebbitzen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:29:16pm

I'm pooped from reading all the links today!

Chag Sameach to my Lizard friends--off to shul for Shavout.

314 Iron Fist  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:29:46pm

Where's the Duck of Peace? Poop demands the Duck of Peace!

315 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:29:49pm

re: #302 vbspurs

It's been a crappy day.

"vbs" -

Whaddabout - "HAVE A CRAPPY DAY?"

-S-

316 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:30:04pm

This thread is going down the crapper.

317 Idle Drifter  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:30:08pm

re: #283 talon_262

The Hardly Boys.

318 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:30:30pm

re: #315 Dr. Shalit

"vbs" -

Whaddabout - "HAVE A CRAPPY DAY?"

-S-

I don't give a crap!

319 opnion  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:30:36pm

re: #295 mitthrawnurdo

Oh, I remember that. Her, that idiot Dru Barrymore, and (I guess) Lucy Lu spouted that crap. I think it was that a) they truly believed that and b) wanted publicity for that bomb of a movie known as Charlie's Angels - Full Throttle.


Now that was a truly dreadful movie. Back in the day when Farrah Faucet, Jacquline Smith and Kate whatsername jiggled all over the place, now that was entertainment. BOOB Thread!

320 goddessoftheclassroom  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:30:47pm

re: #278 pre-Boomer Marine brat

goddess ... are you in here?

(wrinkling nose} Yes. I thought I smelled something...did you just come in from the rain?

321 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:31:22pm

re: #315 Dr. Shalit

"vbs" -

Whaddabout - "HAVE A CRAPPY DAY?"

Is that the Trinity United Church motto?

322 snowcrash  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:31:38pm

The Democrat Party poopers

323 mudhen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:31:48pm

Speaking of strange theories, and for absolutely no reason connected to this thread, there is one theory of how crop circles formed that is just awesome.
See, our gov't needed to test the lasers on our secret Star Wars satellites, but they couldn't do any obvious testing. So they started using them to make the crop circle formations. They could then check the accuracy of the crop circles from space. As time went by, the crop circles have become increasingly more complex.
BTW, we'll use the Star Wars satellites now to blast UFOs out of the sky if they attempt to circumvent the treaty which our gov't has with the aliens. They are allowed to take a few miscellaneous people every year, for whatever reason, but their 'exportation' is carefully monitored. They know that we have systems in place that can nuke their UFOs like a new pan of Jiffy Pop.

True story, that's a real theory. I love people. They are so interesting.

324 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:31:52pm

re: #313 The Rebbitzen

I'm pooped from reading all the links today!

Chag Sameach to my Lizard friends--off to shul for Shavout.

Ms. Reb -

Chag Sameach to all 'y'all too. -S- For everyone else - SHAVUOT = PENTECOST more or less.

-S-

325 Tigger2005  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:32:07pm

re: #272 Salem

It wobbles the mind.

It sorta made sense in '68. The radicals were mad at the Democrats because of "Johnson's War." The scenes of them getting their heads bloodied (after provoking the police by, among other things, throwing shit, I've heard) persuaded the guilt-stricken Dems to nominate a guy who had absolutely no chance of winning the Presidency, with the result that the radicals got stuck with Nixon, who they would soon learn to hate even more than Johnson! Talk about counter-productive protest. We can only hope that the protesters make big enough idiots of themselves that it persuades more people to reject Obama.

326 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:32:26pm

The brown shirts are coming....

The brown shirts are coming....

327 MarkX  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:32:43pm

re: #226 sadhu

potty humor, always a favorite in my family for generations

No shit!

328 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:32:47pm

re: #320 goddessoftheclassroom

(wrinkling nose} Yes. I thought I smelled something...did you just come in from the rain?

See my #308!
(-:
*duck*
Bye!
Love ya!

329 freedombilly  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:32:58pm

This is the single funniest post by Charles ever. My favorite South Park reference of all time. I play the tuba professionally and I have been trying to perfect the brown note for a long time. Once I do, I will dispatch myself to every Code Pink rally within a ten hour drive of DC.

Then they will become Code Brown.

330 goddessoftheclassroom  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:33:18pm

re: #308 pre-Boomer Marine brat

Goddess -- I'm back in with a quick FYI for you.

Dogs never any trouble at Chinese laundries. You know what they say: "No tickee, no shirtee".

But they stay away from other Asian restaurants because they wok their dogs...

331 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:33:40pm

This thread is giving me the runs...really...gotta go!

332 MarkX  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:34:01pm

re: #280 Mich-again

If low frequency sound could make people lose control of their bowels than what explains the kids sitting at red lights with their cars rattling from the sub-woofers cranked up to 11 and yet their windows are rolled up?

Thats' why they're called dumbshits.

333 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:34:15pm

re: #321 vbspurs

Is that the Trinity United Church motto?

"vbs" -
After listening to one of their sermons, methinks all 'y'all have a point.

-S-

334 loflyer  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:34:22pm

Damn, took forever to find any link, and several of you have already posted similar links, and now we have a new thread....

"Another option is the long-range acoustic device or LRAD, originally developed by the U.S. military and manufactured by American Technology Corporation. This 33-inch dish emits a sound blast of up to 150 decibels, deafening and driving away would-be attackers. It proved remarkably effective in foiling a pirate attack on a British cruise ship off the Horn of Africa in 2005. But it’s hardly foolproof, says Butler: “Eventually [pirates] get used to it and wear ear-muffs.”

catch you on the next thread

335 David IV of Georgia  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:34:37pm

re: #193 Geepers

This is a serious story about the stifling of political dissent by a fascist government and all you people can do is make jokes?

Seems silly when you say it like that...

It almost makes me want to look up some crappy nazi memorabilia site to get a brown shirt to wear and then visit my uncle in Denver this summer.

336 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:34:47pm

Does the Brown Note really exist? Well it all DEPENDS...

337 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:35:22pm

re: #330 goddessoftheclassroom

Yes! There was a cookbook out on that subject at the height of the wok craze. "100 ways to wok your dog", or something like that.

338 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:35:40pm

re: #336 So?

Does the Brown Note really exist? Well it all DEPENDS...

So -

Is Is IS?

-S-

339 Slumbering Behemoth  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:35:43pm

re: #135 simonml

My dog barks when I play that frequency only teens can hear. Scares him quite a bit.

That first started as a repellent against loitering teens. Mount a speaker outside a liquor store and annoy the kids away.

When I first saw the story, the phrase "noise only teens can hear" jumped out at me. I knew right away that it would have unintended consequences, kids are much more clever than many adults think.

Thus we have "mosquito ring tones", only the kids can hear when their cell phones ring.

340 David Simon  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:36:19pm

and don't it make my brown eye black and blue

341 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:36:49pm

Well anyway, to all you future DNC contentioneers--good luck. Try not to litter too much. I know you won't, because you guys care about the environment! Stay safe and, hey, have fun.What the hell, huh?

342 Slumbering Behemoth  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:36:52pm

re: #230 guzziguy

Just wear a Haliburton t-shirt, I think that would do it.

343 Dr. Shalit  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:37:48pm

re: #340 David Simon

and don't it make my brown eye black and blue

"D-S" -

Only IF it Works!

-S-

344 eon  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:39:42pm

re: #240 Idle Drifter

Hey, Geepers, I guess the shit has hit the fan when Obama was selected as the Democrat nominee for POTUS and this wild fear amongst the Moonbats that Government Forces might disrupt their fun of burning Denver to the ground with new fangled less-than-lethal weapons has them shitting their pants. I guess we have no choice but to make poop jokes.

Plus the fact that it's difficult for anyone to be serious when confronted by yet another theory about how evil yet ludicrous our government has become under the present administration. They are supposedly cunning, evil schemers while simultaneously being complete nincompoops (pun unintentional, there). As if Dick Cheney were Dr. Evil, and the President was Number Two, the guy with the eyepatch, or vice versa.

That may work in a Mike Myers movie, but in real life, it just isn't possible. But try to convince the "smart, sophisticated" types of that.

And when they continue to rail about it, my response is always the same;



A genuinely evil, and cunning, and even moderately competent government would not be being incommoded by "troofers", and suchlike. Simply because it would already have terminated them, locked them up, or otherwise shut them up. If you don't believe me, read The Gulag Archipelago by Alexander Solzenitzen (sp?)

In short, Mr. or Ms. Speaking Troof To Power, if our government is as you claim, why aren't you dead yet?

In my experience, they tend to go into brainlock at that point. As yet, I haven't seen steam coming out of their ears, but then I haven't put my ear up to their heads to see if I can hear the ocean roar, either.

/betting that I would, though

It says much for how unbelievably safe our society has become that people can live to reach their majority who, in a previous age, probably would not have survived childhood due to their manifest lack of common sense. (As Robert Heinlein once observed, "Stupidity is a capital offense, because sooner or later it will get you killed.")

Their attitude can only be defined as biting the hand which feeds them.

I cannot choose but wonder how they would survive in world run as they wish ours were. My guess is, "not one chance in Hell".

cheers

eon

345 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:39:58pm

re: #325 Tigger2005

It sorta made sense in '68. The radicals were mad at the Democrats because of "Johnson's War." The scenes of them getting their heads bloodied (after provoking the police by, among other things, throwing shit, I've heard) persuaded the guilt-stricken Dems to nominate a guy who had absolutely no chance of winning the Presidency, with the result that the radicals got stuck with Nixon, who they would soon learn to hate even more than Johnson! Talk about counter-productive protest. We can only hope that the protesters make big enough idiots of themselves that it persuades more people to reject Obama.

We deserve no less than a lurid spectacle of Babylonian proportions.

346 Watcher  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:40:49pm

Brown Note? Brown Note?

347 Kenneth  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:40:49pm

re: #323 mudhen

Do you know the real true story of crop circles? It all started in Engalnd when a group of art students got teogether and made a sculpture in a farmer's field by walking around in it draging a large plank of wood. They chose a standard simple celtic design. Took some pictures and submitted it for a term project. Next thing you know, UFO nutjobs start popping out of the woodwork and going on about strange theories of alien visitors. Self appointed "experts" visited the field and took measurements and declared it a legitiamate UFO site. So the group of artists made same more crop circles, then copycats made more, and so on.

It started as an art prject and became a joke.

BTW, I made a crop circle in my back yard today, & although you might just call it "mowing", I'd like to think I was visited by aliens.

348 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:43:01pm

re: #341 Salem

Well anyway, to all you future DNC contentioneers--good luck. Try not to litter too much. I know you won't, because you guys care about the environment! Stay safe and, hey, have fun.What the hell, huh?

Oh, and don't come by my place, cuz I got me a gun.

349 jainphx  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:44:01pm

Those on the perimeter would pass gas, the farther away just a heavy BURP.

350 mudhen  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:45:36pm

re: #347 Kenneth

Do you know the real true story of crop circles? It all started in Engalnd when a group of art students got teogether and made a sculpture in a farmer's field by walking around in it draging a large plank of wood. [...]
It started as an art prject and became a joke.

Yes, that's true. But what's interesting is that a whole culture appeared, to support and 'investigate' the circles. So many professionals put their names to various studies showing how the stems were bent with heat, etc. They can't just admit the farce.

When they come up with elegant Unified Field Theories that weave aliens, crop circles, Star Wars, abductions, mutilations, secret government conspiracies, and all that.. it's just darned entertaining.

351 Mich-again  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:46:20pm

Talk about conjuring up images of Chicago in '68...

After employing the brown note machine, the police will have to spray down the crowd with fire hoses.

352 pingjockey  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:46:45pm

Don't know if anyone mentioned this, Myth Busters did and episode on the "Brown Note, guess what? It doesn't work! Zip, zero, nada, zilch, nil. No such thing. What you cna use is extremely high power sound to incapacitate. Over 150db.

353 wong fei hung  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:47:21pm

"Just Poop" is not a slogan.

It's a declaration: they're telling us who they are.

-WFH

354 funky chicken  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:47:45pm

This has to be a moonbat moby, right? This isn't a real person who actually believes in "brown notes." And the rest of the moonbats are just agreeing because they don't want to hurt the original guy's self esteem.

c'mon, please tell me they aren't this crazy

355 FrogMarch  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:51:01pm

Considering the bullshit that's going to be flowing inside the convention...
buck up!

356 funky chicken  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:52:09pm

re: #198 Roentgen

If an aluminum foil hat will protect a moonbat's head from Martian Brain Control Waves, then does it not follow that an aluminum pants suit would do the same to protect them from Big Brown Note?

And Roentgen, if I may say so myself, you are just the guy to market said radiation resistance gear. I see an unserved market just waiting to be, er, exploited.

357 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:52:59pm

In order to get a PhD in Poopology your thesis must be written on Brown note paper.


/ then again, it all DEPENDS

358 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:54:37pm

Farking Poop Already!

...last famous words before the Gallactica blew up

359 So?  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:55:33pm

Bring out the whoopee cushion...I say!

360 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:56:18pm

re: #358 So?

...last famous words before the Gallactica blew up

Remember the Drain.

361 cincinnati_kid37  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:57:06pm

I recommend suing the Denver Police if they use it on the basis that this would in fact accelerate the Global Climate Change Crisis.
No Shit

362 wong fei hung  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:58:18pm

It looks like a gay misogynist parade with all those "Stand Up To Bush" signs.

-WFH

363 Gordan the Fisherman  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:58:31pm

Most of these moonbats are such dirty scumbags you wouldnt even be able to tell the difference if you played the brown note with a tuba.

364 mikalm  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 6:59:48pm

Will the Brown Note work if the protestors have The Constipation Blues?

365 justadot  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:00:09pm

re: #354 funky chicken

I think he really is a dedicated anarchist (Confluence Collective) -- not a moby.

366 mikalm  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:02:15pm

Poop for Peace Day - April 18

367 mikalm  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:03:45pm

re: #365 justadot

I think he really is a dedicated anarchist

Dedicated, or defecated?

(Sorry - the 12 YO boy that lives inside MikalM's mind just can't resist bathroom humor!)

368 MajorPribluda  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:04:11pm

Just doo it.

369 vbspurs  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:04:22pm

re: #366 mikalm

Poop for Peace Day - April 18

LOL!

Every time I have prunes, I am contributing to the peace process.

370 ploome hineni[deleted]  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:05:39pm
371 Just Above Average  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:12:13pm

Being a newbie on lgf, one still in diapers, I was concerned with the sheer 'nastiness' I've observed recently on certain topics. I even mentioned this to a veteran lgf'r, whom I've known for decades. I was told to hang in there, and be patient because sometimes threads get hilarious. I'm so glad that I finally 'skidded' into this one. Funnier than farts!

372 jackjones  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:16:02pm

there was a classic South Park episode about the "brown note"
this is a link to a clip...but you can click a link to watch the full episode:
south park brown note episode

373 David IV of Georgia  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:17:01pm

On July 28, 1996 in Atlanta I saw a police sergeant quietly laughing to himself. I asked him why.

He said that although the day before had been truly terrible, he had done something that been the most fun of his career:

After the bomb blew up, the press center next to the park locked its doors. All the pressmen from the park wanted to get to their telephones to call in their stories. The main entrance to the press center, now locked, was also en route to the closest hospital. Ambulances couldn't get past the crowds of press. So the police gassed the reporters when they wouldn't disperse.

374 Ojoe  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:19:56pm

re: #303 nyc redneck

PASTA AL FORNO

INSALATA

OLIVI

PANE

FUNGI SOTTO OLIO.

375 FredWM  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:21:15pm

That was one of the Mythbusters funniest episodes. They went around with their underwear on the outside of their pants for the last half of the show. But even then, they were more serious then these guys.

376 Mich-again  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:22:33pm

I took a side trip over to Kos to see if they were covering the Obama blog story at all. (Nope.) But funny coincidence, the top diary there now is from brownsocks. hmmm.

377 Salem  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:29:35pm

Obama will ban the brown note.

378 ContraJihadi  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:41:05pm

Well, not only do chickens come home to roost, but they are notorious cacophages.

379 mossley  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:49:51pm

Of course they're terrified of this. They have shit for brains.

380 mayor of imaginationland  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:53:31pm

This makes it even funnier:
Mythbusters tested the brown note and found it to be a complete myth. Not only are they going ape, they are going ape over a disproved threat

HA HA HA HA!

381 Emery Calame  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 7:59:30pm

So now it's "Poop truth to power" eh?

382 edward cropper  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 8:01:20pm

check out my blog for photo proof that the brown note really works.

383 6pat6  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 8:08:19pm

re: #373 David IV of Georgia

That's funny!

384 PeggyU  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 8:27:54pm

Ah, but wouldn't a caterer with ExLax brownies and a visit from the municipal band mess with their little minds ...

385 Just Another Four-letter Word  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 8:48:13pm

re: #371 Just Above Average

Being a newbie on lgf, one still in diapers, I was concerned with the sheer 'nastiness' I've observed recently on certain topics. I even mentioned this to a veteran lgf'r, whom I've known for decades. I was told to hang in there, and be patient because sometimes threads get hilarious. I'm so glad that I finally 'skidded' into this one. Funnier than farts!

I think you'll fit in here nicely!

JAFLW

386 Challenger  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 9:23:13pm

LMAO! Hey guys, seriously, just wear diapers. That'll stop 'em.
/s

What's next? Tinfoil pants? Wasn't that a Southpark episode?

387 Dave Brown  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 9:23:36pm

OK fellow lizardoids, you may not like this, but...

"You're not paranoid if they're really out to get you"

Now I'm not saying that "brown noise" will be used in Denver, but it does exist.

I have in my hands, a 1971 book by Zbigniew Brzezinski called "Between Two Ages". [Link: www.amazon.com...]

In my opinion, Brzezinski is not only anti-Israel, but also a slimy bastard, who (more than Reagan) can be "credited" with inventing the Taliban. He also has been an advocate of social engineering and manipulation. And an Obama supporter, I believe. The irony...

The information below comes from a "conspiracy" web-site, and I can only verify the section about Brzezinski. But I'm pretty sure that low frequency "brown noise" does elicit a "vagus nerve" response that sets up a anticholinergic-type "defecation/flight" response. And Brzezinski seemed to advocate its use in crowd control in his book, "Between Two Ages":

Related research by Begich and Manning uncovered bizarre schemes. For example, U.S. Air Force documents revealed that a system had been developed for manipulating and disrupting human mental processes through pulsed radio-frequency radiation (the stuff of HAARP, "High-frequency Active Auroral Research Program") over large geographical areas.

The most telling material about this technology came from writings of Zbigniew Brzezinski (former National Security Advisor to President Carter) and J.F. MacDonald (Science Advisor to President Johnson and a Professor of Geophysics at UCLA), as they wrote about use of power-beaming transmitters for geophysical and environmental warfare. The documents showed how these effects might be caused, and the negative effects on human health and thinking.

The mental-disruption possibilities for HAARP are the most disturbing. More than 40 pages of the book, with dozens of footnotes, chronicle the work of Harvard professors, military planners and scientists as they plan and test this use of the electromagnetic technology. For example, one of the papers describing this use was from the International Red Cross in Geneva. It even gave the frequency ranges where these effects could occur the same ranges which HAARP is capable of broadcasting.

The following statement was made more than 25 years ago in a book which Brzezinski wrote while a professor at Columbia University:

"Political strategists are tempted to exploit research on the brain and human behavior. Geophysicist Gordon J. F. MacDonald specialist in problems of warfare says accurately timed, artificially excited electronic strokes 'could lead to a pattern of oscillations that produce relatively high power levels over certain regions of the Earth. . . . In this way, one could develop a system that would seriously impair the brain performance of very large populations in selected regions over an extended period. . . .' No matter how deeply disturbing the thought of using the environment to manipulate behavior for national advantages, to some the technology permitting such use will very probably develop within the next few decades."

[Link: www.clubconspiracy.com...]

388 Charles  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 9:25:15pm

Uh, no. It does not exist. And a crazy post at a conspiracy web site isn't the best kind of source.

389 Dave Brown  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 9:33:49pm

I'm honored to receive a response from The Man himself!

Charles, "brown noise" may not exist, but Brzezinski sure wrote about it in 1971 as if it did.

Really, check the book out of the library. Its an interesting book for its time, and a scary one (particularly because Brzezinski may acheive a position of power from Obama): [Link: www.amazon.com...]

390 missykrissy  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 9:37:01pm

But for this to 'work' - wouldn't you first have to be full of.... you know.

391 NeoCon-`  Sun, Jun 8, 2008 10:14:58pm

Actually, I was surprised to learn that the Army has a weapon which will induce severe nausea. They've got a couple posted on some guard towers at some FOBs (Forward Operating Bases) here in Iraq. It apparently works as described in the story above, but instead of causing someone to lose their bowels, they tend to keep calling out the name "Ralph".

392 Egfrow  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 12:57:53am

re: #386 Challenger

The Brown Note: Episode 48

393 bhop  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 5:16:36am

Here's the subwoofer that will produce the Brown Note: Matterhorn

394 Hard Right  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 5:36:32am

OMG, as if we needed more proof of how reality challenged the left is.

I may soil myself just from laughing at this.

395 Clutch  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 6:22:53am

re: #285 MandyManners

re: #254 mudhen

Now, wait a minute. Tesla had a device that caused people to poop. It had to do with vibrations coming from the floor. But he also had a cache of secret papers, that went missing after his death. He had hinted at a Death Ray, and other esoteric inventions.

Maybe the gov't is finally getting around to looking at his secret papers and has figured out a use for the Bowel Content Liquidator.

If we can get this rumor going strongly enough, any loud persistent tone will cause part of the crowd to poop, just from mass hysteria and suggestion.

Denver police, hope you are listening. Just a nice low tone. And make sure the cops wear masks and gloves. It will add to the effect.


Wicked!

And don't forget to have them equipped with cans of Glade Air Freshener (CFC-free propellant, of course, to placate Gaia) conspicuously displayed in their utility belts or in bandoleers for those heavy concentrations where multiple cans will need to be deployed quickly.

396 Kenneth  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 6:44:18am

re: #387 Dave Brown

You are confusing infrasound energy (low frequency sound waves) with high frequency electromagnetic energy. Those are two very different physical phenomenon. I recall reading that infrasound was tested and did indeed cause subjects (army volunteers) to loose bowel control, however, they were unable to control the direction of the waves & the operators also lost control. Not a good feature.

High energy electromagnetic energy include microwave and high frequency beams. These beams can heat matter or cause electrical circuits to malfunction. Electromagnetic beams are easier to aim, making them more effective as a weapon. However, the energy is dissipated in the atmosphere, requiring extremely powerful energy sources to drive them. Also, as these beams would certainly kill or maim they would be totally unsuitable for crowd control.

397 cygnus  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 6:55:04am

re: #3 goddessoftheclassroom

Oops! Hit the down ding button by mistake.

398 Challenger  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 7:25:09am

re: #392 Egfrow

The Brown Note: Episode 48

LOL. I love South Park.

"A note that is ninety-two octaves below B-flat."

399 A.W.  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 7:33:26am

Why do i get the feeling that they are just going to use this as an excuse when they make in their pants on their own?

400 eaglewingz08  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 10:28:02am

Those mad geniuses at the Belmont Races, conspired to have Big Brown lose, in order to take citizen's minds off the fact that Big Brown has another more sinister meaning, the pooper dooper. So now that the Big Brown is off the front pages, having been wrongfully deprived of the Triple Crown by those evil joos and neocons, the City of Denver can plow full speed ahead into making the Dem Convention a real brown nosed affair. /koolaid.

401 Dave Brown  Mon, Jun 9, 2008 8:15:33pm

#396 Kenneth:

Thanks for the response. Your info matches that found on Wikipedia:
[Link: en.wikipedia.org...]

Clearly, the references to HAARP are related to the high frequency noise.

I thought that Brzezinski was writing about low frequency noise, but I may be mistaken. In any case, I'm sure that we can all agree on two points:

1] Brzezinski is a lying sack-of-sh*t, and
2] There certainly is a lot of weird sh*t in store us in this election!

True that...


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