Iowahawk: Clockwork O-Rage

Humor | Sun, Sep 21, 2008 at 9:11:42 pm PDT

Viddy well, oh my brothers: Clockwork O-Rage as Obama Urges Supporters to Stomp Home Message of Hope.

LAS VEGAS, NV — Barack Obama stepped up his attacks on Republican rival John McCain today during a campaign stop in Nevada, telling supporters to “get in the faces” of waivering voters with his message of hope, change, and “brass fisties.”

“Righty right, me malenky droogs,” said Obama, nonchalantly spinning a steel baton while pacing the stage before a packed audience at a Las Vegas baseball stadium. “Come with uncle and hear all proper! Hear angel trumpets and devil trombones. You are all invited. I want you to talk to them whether they are independent or whether they are Republican. I want you to argue with them and get in their faces, with bootsie-woots if thou it suits.”

Obama said his new gloves-off campaign strategy was prompted by what he described as a coordinated effort by McCain and talk radio to distract from his message of national unity.

“One thing I could never stand was to hear a filthy, dirty old partisan bushie, howling away his filthy songs and going blurpy blurp,” said Obama. “Naughty, naughty, naughty! You filthy old soomkas!”