I'm really despondent over today's huge market losses, so I will say I'm not in the mood for humour.

re: #1 noshariaincanada

I'm really despondent over today's huge market losses, so I will say I'm not in the mood for humour.

Hope you don't mind if the rest of us have a well needed chuckle.

...and I don't want to be pessimistic at this time, but it really bothers me that polls are still putting nobama ahead.

"Many of our community inhabit the Tapioca subluster of the 11th Dimension, and it's hard for them to find a convenient spacehole to make it to the local elementary school," explained ASDFG.

*enjoying a much-needed chuckle*

Iowahawk... such a friggin' genius. He and Charles are two of the Great Ones.
I'm laughing and crying at the same time.

That took me a second to realize this was satire...

re: #1 noshariaincanada

Don't worry.
What goes down will come up.

Update: Deceased Americans for Change have just joined as a second plaintiff.

Fwinklezorg the Hydragoat

That would be a fantastic name for a new Lizard...

Well, mabye we can bring charges against these imagenary Americans for trashing the mortgage business. 'Cause no one in DC is going to get blamed for this.

re: #7 clear vision

Don't worry.
What goes down will come up.

thanks.

"To be is to stand for." Abraham J. Heschel
"To not exist is to vote for the One." ACORN

Classic:
"Whether we are obituary notices, hallucinatory giant rabbits, or strings of random keyboard strokes, it's time for the chimera community to stand up and claim our rights as citizens."

Where's the SARC tag?

A Real Opportunity for McCain

Actually Leftwing groups have for many years been filing lawsuits to prevent states and counties from asking voters for ID, as well as requiring proof of citizenship when registering to vote.

Iowahawk's spoof is not far from the truth.

re: #15 Lumpy

A Real Opportunity for McCain

Blog pimping, are we?

I'm an anti-imaginite.

re: #18 bosforus

I'm an anti-imaginite.

Imaginary-ist.

/ ?

There goes ACORN again with their "imaginary" friends. ;~)

“We will not be silent when government denies people access to the polls on the basis of color, or sex, or existential status.”

or life status.

This would be funny if not for my sneaking suspicion that ACORN may have actually tried this somewhere in the US.

re: #19 Fat Jolly Penguin

Imaginary-ist.

/ ?

Imaginary suffrage!

"...ACORN and Project Vote filed an anti-discrimination voting rights suit in the U.S. Federal District court this morning, alleging the United States government is involved in “a widespread, systematic effort to disenfranchise Imaginary-Americans and deprive them of access to polls.”

It would be hilarious if it weren't so close to the truth.

Then again, maybe that IS what makes it hilarious.

Dear ACORN,

Don't forget to register the unicorns and lepricauns, too!

And I could tell by the way my pets were sniffing at the TV during the debates THEY want to vote! (Well, the cat was coughing up a hairball while Obama spoke but that can't be an opinion can it?)

BTW: Can you do something about all the voters down here in Florida on life-support? Grandma's TV was on all through the debate and I'm SURE she could use a registration card...

Acorn is nuts- folks are starting to get it- Obama rallies are shrinking- McCain/Palin are growing- resentment against the lying media is growing- ahhh Justice!

re: #19 Fat Jolly Penguin

Imaginary-ist.

/ ?

I am a Proud Anti-Specterist. Call me racist, if you must.

IowaHawk is why I don't even attempt satire.

/I'd be fighting above my weight class, and I know it already

Beautiful- because it's so friggin' close to being true.

/oh, PS, 'hawk- It's Bangalore.

;-)

cheers

eon

Calling the Old Media: Five Million Illegals Have Illegal Mortgages in U.S.A.!
By Warner Todd Huston (Bio | Archive)
October 9, 2008 - 11:42 ET
A single report by KFYI radio of Phoenix, Arizona highlights a shocking claim made by the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD). HUD says that five million illegal aliens hold illegal mortgages. This is just one more example of the lax lending laws put into place by Democrats like Barney Frank that have contributed to this economic crisis. One would think this would be big news. But, so far we have only this one report to cover it.
[Link: newsbusters.org...]

great satire; but of course, satire is based on truth.

And what about dead people? Why should they be denied their voting rights, just because of their... uh, severely handicapped status?!

re: #1 noshariaincanada

I'm really despondent over today's huge market losses, so I will say I'm not in the mood for humour.

If Charles Swab comes back on TV again, telling everyone to just relax (ala 2001), I'm mailing him a rotten fish!

re: #25 TimO

Dear ACORN,

Don't forget to register the unicorns and lepricauns, too!

And I could tell by the way my pets were sniffing at the TV during the debates THEY want to vote! (Well, the cat was coughing up a hairball while Obama spoke but that can't be an opinion can it?)

Civil Rights for Leprechauns!

Or we'll make you wear the Green Shoes.

Heh, I got laid off last Sept.- cashed in the 403b and got good money in January. Unfortunately the fracking taxes and penalties will be just like the economic hit you all are experiencing.

re: #31 Occasional Reader

And what about dead people? Why should they be denied their voting rights, just because of their... uh, severely handicapped status?!

Breathing challenged?

re: #31 Occasional Reader

And what about dead people? Why should they be denied their voting rights, just because of their... uh, severely handicapped status?!

I just don't understand what happens to them when they die. The recently deceased overwhelmingly vote Dem. Is it just dead people in general that see something in the Dem ticket, or is that dead Republicans just don't get out the vote?

re: #1 noshariaincanada

I'm really despondent over today's huge market losses, so I will say I'm not in the mood for humour.

Then why would you read a thread that is related to something written by IowaHawk?

re: #29 LEGION

Calling the Old Media: Five Million Illegals Have Illegal Mortgages in U.S.A.!
By Warner Todd Huston (Bio | Archive)
October 9, 2008 - 11:42 ET
A single report by KFYI radio of Phoenix, Arizona highlights a shocking claim made by the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD). HUD says that five million illegal aliens hold illegal mortgages. This is just one more example of the lax lending laws put into place by Democrats like Barney Frank that have contributed to this economic crisis. One would think this would be big news. But, so far we have only this one report to cover it.
[Link: newsbusters.org...]

Five million? Hell, that's just in California.

/sarc

//maybe not

re: #25 TimO

Dear ACORN,

Don't forget to register the unicorns and lepricauns, too!

And I could tell by the way my pets were sniffing at the TV during the debates THEY want to vote! (Well, the cat was coughing up a hairball while Obama spoke but that can't be an opinion can it?)

My dog supports McCain/Palin but I'm convinced the cats are in the tank for Obama.

re: #39 doppelganglander

My dog supports McCain/Palin but I'm convinced the cats are in the tank for Obama.

There is NO WAY any cat would vote for Obama!

HALLUCINISTS!

LOL! I glanced at the headline and believed it at first. Nothing's too bizarre these days, it seems.

re: #32 SummerSong

If Charles Swab comes back on TV again, telling everyone to just relax (ala 2001), I'm mailing him a rotten fish!

At least you'll be able to afford the postage.

re: #40 goddessoftheclassroom

There is NO WAY any cat would vote for Obama!

Even to torment with the human race? I know my cat would have at least considered it, God rest his soul.

Audacity of Hope, a new sitcom

Obama is going give us a good tap dance show!

For those of you who are down about the polls...Like Zogby said today, "Don't believe the hype." Don't trust the polls...they're slanted, and the liberals are very adept at making it look like they're winning.

re: #39 doppelganglander

My dog supports McCain/Palin but I'm convinced the cats are in the tank for Obama.

Well, with cradle to gave nanny care, they would be wouldn't they? A cat, like a Democrat just feel that is their entitlement.

re: #26 LEGION

Acorn is nuts- folks are starting to get it- Obama rallies are shrinking- McCain/Palin are growing- resentment against the lying media is growing- ahhh Justice!

But is it enough make the difference?

We shall see...

I see dead people...and they're voting!

How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink? -- Steven Wright

There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an
idiot. -- Steven Wright

re: #40 goddessoftheclassroom

There is NO WAY any cat would vote for Obama!

I had a black cat once..I think 95% of all Black Cats are voting for Obama.
/

acorn is so beyond the pale it would take all the reasoning power they had to see why a law suit like this would not fly.
but they would consider it.
acorn and all the libs involved are such crazed pushy bastards they feel entitled to get away w/ anything to get what they want.
any means to an end.
let's put these crooks in jail.

re: #45 taxfreekiller

heh.

re: #47 readytofight

For those of you who are down about the polls...Like Zogby said today, "Don't believe the hype." Don't trust the polls...they're slanted, and the liberals are very adept at making it look like they're winning.

Adept? They seem to be rather ham-fisted about it this year...

re: #50 jorline

Did you change you avatar? Or am I tripping again?

re: #40 goddessoftheclassroom

There is NO WAY any cat would vote for Obama!

Just wait until Obama starts pushing for the teaching of "Critical Species Theory". In a few generations domesticated pets will see America as a place that is inherently specist and must be overthrown. In that America my friend, you are part of the problem, not the solution.

re: #51 HoosierHoops

I have a King High Spade Flush. I know they're all voting for obama.

Humor is something that thrives between man's aspirations and his limitations. There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth.

~Victor Borge

re: #51 HoosierHoops

I had a black cat once..I think 95% of all Black Cats are voting for Obama.
/

For some odd reason I'm in a Steven Wright mood today...drink.

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on
them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. -- Steven Wright

said ASDF ASDFG, a spokesperson for the National Association for the Advancement of Imaginary People

I know we're not supposed to post this, but this person's address and phone numbers are:

123 Fake Street
Anytown, New Vermont

Tel. (555) 555-1212

Participation in our electoral process is a fundamental right

Speaking of 'rights'

Bill Whittle hits a homer.

“Free” health-care costs us something precious, and no less precious for being invisible. Because there’s a word for someone who has their food, housing and care provided for them… for people who owe their existence to someone else.
And that word is “slaves.”

I took a train up to Rhode Island today so my daughter would not have to ride home from college alone. It wasn't totally altruistic. I don't trust her driving alone and she has a lousy sense of direction even with the GPS. And since I did not call ahead to see that they had an Internet connection on the train, I was outa touch. However they did sell beer, so it wasn't all bad. But since my daughter was listening to her music in the car, I didn't know the market had crashed till I got close to NYC and had the misfortune of listening to the news for traffic reports. They were even talking about the precipitous drop on sports talk FAN? Now the bad news, I noticed on the road very few Obama bumper stickers on cars but NO McCain/ Palin ones. Not one! Oh, and I have not had any food since last night and my damn liberal relatives are still faking it in Temple. Shit--anyone got any GOOD news for me?

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.

~Bill Cosby

re: #57 Cap'n DOC

I have a King High Spade Flush. I know they're all voting for obama.

Well that and because Obama is a card

re: #56 Scion9

Just wait until Obama starts pushing for the teaching of "Critical Species Theory". In a few generations domesticated pets will see America as a place that is inherently specist and must be overthrown. In that America my friend, you are part of the problem, not the solution.

Not impossible. I believe Spain had legistration designed to give human rights to gorillas.

re: #55 Walter L. Newton

Did you change you avatar? Or am I tripping again?

LOL...I changed it.

Lizard green, shamrocks for the restaurant and new flip flops since I live next to the beach.

Your meds are fine Walter.

re: #36 Scion9

Is it just dead people in general that see something in the Dem ticket

They know that they, personally, can't be taxed any more, so they figure, why the hell not vote (D)?

re: #40 goddessoftheclassroom

There is NO WAY any cat would vote for Obama!

I beg to differ. They're sneaky like that. I caught one of them sitting in front of channel 73 on our Dish Network, mesmerized. They also recently demanded I switch from Meow Mix to Iams by staging a protest consisting of barfing up hairballs on my carpet. And I'm pretty sure ACORN has registered them to vote, which is just ridiculous. They're only 5 and 6 years old.

Forgive me, but has everyone already read Victor Davis Hanson over at the corner?

If you haven't, go read it!

VDH asks "What is wisdom?" and eviscerates Brooks and Obama.

Only real people should vote. Is that 'realism'?

OMG

snip:
Obama TV: The One buys half an hour of airtime on CBS for Oct. 29

Rashid Khalidi getting discussed on Fox.

...the suit also seeks enforcement of the Americans with Dimensional Disabilities Act. The Act requires voting places to make accommodations for existentially-challenged voters who have trouble completing ballots written in standard 3-dimensional reality.

South Florida, I presume.

re: #67 Occasional Reader

They know that they, personally, can't be taxed any more, so they figure, why the hell not vote (D)?

Well electing a Dem might well bring on the "end of days" when the dead will arise, so I guess for them it's a smart move?

re: #59 jorline

For some odd reason I'm in a Steven Wright mood today...drink.

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on
them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. -- Steven Wright

Hi Jorline! How's it going?
Who is Steven Wright?

Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

re: 54

I agree. But I'm so tired of hearing republicans chanting their mantra that we're behind. I refuse to comply.

re: #62 nevergiveup

I took a train up to Rhode Island today so my daughter would not have to ride home from college alone. It wasn't totally altruistic. I don't trust her driving alone and she has a lousy sense of direction even with the GPS. And since I did not call ahead to see that they had an Internet connection on the train, I was outa touch. However they did sell beer, so it wasn't all bad. But since my daughter was listening to her music in the car, I didn't know the market had crashed till I got close to NYC and had the misfortune of listening to the news for traffic reports. They were even talking about the precipitous drop on sports talk FAN? Now the bad news, I noticed on the road very few Obama bumper stickers on cars but NO McCain/ Palin ones. Not one! Oh, and I have not had any food since last night and my damn liberal relatives are still faking it in Temple. Shit--anyone got any GOOD news for me?

I saved a lot on insurance by switching to Geico.

re: #39 doppelganglander

My dog supports McCain/Palin but I'm convinced the cats are in the tank for Obama.

Naw! My cats are still pissed about Ron Paul.

Good one Iowahawk! Good afternoon all.

I hear Soros was billions into Lehman. I've also heard Lehman was a prime speculator in the oil run-up, losing billions. Lehman big-wigs were big democrat contributors and we know Soros' goal.

Did Soros have enough leverage to sacrifice Lehman in order to create an Obama-friendly crisis?

Has it morphed into Soros' goal of bursting the American bubble?

re: #66 jorline

LOL...I changed it.

Lizard green, shamrocks for the restaurant and new flip flops since I live next to the beach.

Very stylish!

re: #78 DeafDog

I saved a lot on insurance by switching to Geico.

I already have USAA, come one, you gotta do better than that?

re: #68 doppelganglander

I beg to differ. They're sneaky like that. I caught one of them sitting in front of channel 73 on our Dish Network, mesmerized. They also recently demanded I switch from Meow Mix to Iams by staging a protest consisting of barfing up hairballs on my carpet. And I'm pretty sure ACORN has registered them to vote, which is just ridiculous. They're only 5 and 6 years old.

that's over 21 years of age in cat years.

re: #40 null

There is NO WAY any cat would vote for Obama!

He promised them unlimited tuna dinners, didn't you hear?

re: #62 null

Shit--anyone got any GOOD news for me?

Dems are getting pissed over Ayers.

A doll some are claiming utters pro-Islam and even satanic messages has outraged parents in Oklahoma and Pennsylvania.
How can they tell which is which?

I was talking about this the other day with my friend Harvey when our insubstantial friend The Holy Ghost assured us that every vote counts, has counted and always will be counted. Nice to join the conversation. Can you guess who I really am?

re: #82 nevergiveup

I already have USAA, come one, you gotta do better than that?

Once Obama is elected, all of your wildest dreams will come true.

Or was that Pedro?

re: #85 bosforus

Dems are getting pissed over Ayers.

Yep! *high five*

But don't you remember the old saying:

I vote - therefore I am

/Chicago Ergo Sum

re: #87 PrinceofGotham

I was talking about this the other day with my friend Harvey when our insubstantial friend The Holy Ghost assured us that every vote counts, has counted and always will be counted. Nice to join the conversation. Can you guess who I really am?

Bruce Wayne?

Since were on the subject of voter fraud, my other daughter goes to school in NY State. She needed and absentee ballot for NJ ( I have since gotten it for her ). But they wanted her to ALSO register in NY State and vote up there? Are there any laws and or anybody watching this shit? Yeah, I know . Stupid question.

Does iowahawk ever post comments here anymore?

I know he does occasionally at Tim Blair's (as does James Lileks), but I haven't seen him here in ages.

re: #61 solomonpanting

Participation in our electoral process is a fundamental right

Speaking of 'rights'

Bill Whittle hits a homer.

Yes indeed. Opting into a 'free' healthcare system that demands that healthcare professionals attend to you is a violation of the 13th Amendment's Involuntary Servitude clause.

Regardless of the level of compensation, or the conditions of the service, as long as one does not negotiate that contract themselves and the government does it for them, it is involuntary.

That is unless State run healthcare is going to be administered by convicted felons...

re: #48 Outrider

Well, with cradle to gave nanny care, they would be wouldn't they? A cat, like a Democrat just feel that is their entitlement.

No, in the cat's case, she really is entitled. They were worshipped as gods in ancient Egypt, and still should be.

Didn't you read the contract when you were adopted?

re: #93 Spiny Norman

Yes. He has no socks...

Re: 62

Yes, there is good news. The lack of signs just means the McCain/Palin people don't want to risk getting their cars keyed and houses graffitied by the thugs of "In your face." Obama.

Anyone know how to get a march on Washington started at the grassroots level? Let's go to Washington and demand they get our of our house!

I am calling the IACLU to let them know I support civil liberties for imaginary Americans.

re: #93 Spiny Norman

Does iowahawk ever post comments here anymore?

I know he does occasionally at Tim Blair's (as does James Lileks), but I haven't seen him here in ages.

He was posting here yesterday in a discussion about his "Children of the Corn" video thread.

re: #93 Spiny Norman

Does iowahawk ever post comments here anymore?

I know he does occasionally at Tim Blair's (as does James Lileks), but I haven't seen him here in ages.

He was here yesterday on the Village of the Damned thread.

re: #87 PrinceofGotham

I was talking about this the other day with my friend Harvey when our insubstantial friend The Holy Ghost assured us that every vote counts, has counted and always will be counted. Nice to join the conversation. Can you guess who I really am?

I'll bite.

Jimmy Stewart?

re: #62 null

Depends. Is your daughter single? Is she cute? Answer the second question first. Essay test to follow. Multi-culties start asking for dowery at this time.

re: #92 nevergiveup

Since were on the subject of voter fraud, my other daughter goes to school in NY State. She needed and absentee ballot for NJ ( I have since gotten it for her ). But they wanted her to ALSO register in NY State and vote up there? Are there any laws and or anybody watching this shit? Yeah, I know . Stupid question.

Yes, it's completely against the law, but is not uncommon practice among NY Dems who have vacation homes in Florida...

re: #66 jorline

LOL...I changed it. Lizard green, shamrocks for the restaurant and new flip flops since I live next to the beach. Your meds are fine Walter.

Ok, I thought I was getting too much air up the kilts!

re: #87 PrinceofGotham

I was talking about this the other day with my friend Harvey when our insubstantial friend The Holy Ghost assured us that every vote counts, has counted and always will be counted. Nice to join the conversation. Can you guess who I really am?

I dunno..for your 2nd post..you're kindof freaking me out...

re: #99 Semper Gumbi

He was posting here yesterday in a discussion about his "Children of the Corn" video thread.

Crap. I missed him, damnit.

re: #93 Spiny Norman

Does iowahawk ever post comments here anymore?

I know he does occasionally at Tim Blair's (as does James Lileks), but I haven't seen him here in ages.

He was here yesterday...

re: #61 null

Participation in our electoral process is a fundamental right

Speaking of 'rights'

Bill Whittle hits a homer.

That was one of his better ones.

The obvious response when someone tells you that you have a "right" to free health care is,

OK, but who's going to pay for it? Or are you telling me that everyone who'll be supplying it- all the doctors, RNs, PNs, technicians, pharmacists, drug companies, and even the people who'll make me a pacemaker if I need it- are going to contribute their time, work, talents and resources gratis? Who pays them?

And when they go into an elaborate "explanation" of how this pyramid scheme works, hit them with Fineberg's Third Law;

If elaborate calculations are needed to justify an action, the action itself is unwise.

cheers

eon

re: #75 HoosierHoops

Hi Jorline! How's it going?
Who is Steven Wright?

Hoopster, you're kidding me...I'm emailing a list of jokes. He tells these jokes with a straight face and a dry sense of humor.

Check your mail.

re: #101 DeafDog

I'll bite.

Jimmy Stewart?

Nope this is my laptop persona. Jimmy Stewart got into acting to avoid his father's Hardware business. Paul Newman was running away from Sporting Goods. Wonder if they ever talked.

re: #102 PrinceofGotham

Depends. Is your daughter single? Is she cute? Answer the second question first. Essay test to follow. Multi-culties start asking for dowery at this time.

Dowry. One dowers a daughter, but the thing itself is a dowry.

Cats are way to superior a creature to be hanging around the likes of Obama.

After the stock market dip today and ACORN trying to steel the election I loved Iowahawk giving us something to make us laugh.

re: #81 scottishbuzzsaw

Very stylish!

Thanks, scottish...fits my personality better. It's hard to be Space Ghost when you're 54...LOL

Great. Imaginary people get voting rights. Imagine the insanity of an all liberal administration, supreme court and legislative branch. It will be more than imaginary people voting: Picture voting rights for "citizens of the world".

Meanwhile, my USAA Precious Metals mutual fund has completely tanked. I though this one would thrive in this mess. Not hardly.

Retirement, here I come! Not.

re: #104 Walter L. Newton

Ok, I thought I was getting too much air up the kilts!

LMAO

re: #76 majic1

Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

If you call a dog, it comes to you.

If you call a cat, its service takes a message, and it promises to call you back. Maybe.

/To get the cat to come, open a can of tuna. Be braced for the sonic boom as he goes Machbusting about the time he hits the kitty door.

cheers

eon

re: #92 null

Since were on the subject of voter fraud, my other daughter goes to school in NY State. She needed and absentee ballot for NJ ( I have since gotten it for her ). But they wanted her to ALSO register in NY State and vote up there? Are there any laws and or anybody watching this shit? Yeah, I know . Stupid question.

Illegal if she votes in the federal election.

re: #111 Dianna

Dowry. One dowers a daughter, but the thing itself is a dowry.

Voice of experience. How many camels did your father give with you? I am modern man. I want a tractor.

Lizards, I must report to you that I have been the victim of a crime most henious.
Pulling into my driveway Tuesday night returning from the airport I noticed that my McCain yard sign was gone. Deductive reasoning led me to conclude that it was stolen.
But I planned ahead, because I thought thet my across the street neighbor who is a big supporter of Obama might do that. He has lots of cred , an ex con with copious amounts of money. I prodced a new sign from my trunk and put in the lawn.
But wait , my Repub precinct captain delivered a McCain/ Palin sign which is now proudly displayed.
If I catch that little shit nabbing this one , I will go all Taliban on him.

Is anybody else having a problem with the LGF RSS feed?

Glad this works, now it is back to reality.

Time to call it a day Lizards...have a good night!

I was born by Caesarian section...but not so you'd notice. It's just that when
I leave a house, I go out through the window. -- Steven Wright

I bought a self learning record to learn Spanish. I turned it on and went to
sleep; the record got stuck. The next day I could only stutter in Spanish.
-- Steven Wright

I didn't get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead. You
couldn't see anything, but every now and then you'd hear this rumbling noise go
by. -- Steven Wright

re: #122 jorline

Time to call it a day Lizards...have a good night!

I was born by Caesarian section...but not so you'd notice. It's just that when
I leave a house, I go out through the window. -- Steven Wright

I bought a self learning record to learn Spanish. I turned it on and went to
sleep; the record got stuck. The next day I could only stutter in Spanish.
-- Steven Wright

I didn't get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead. You
couldn't see anything, but every now and then you'd hear this rumbling noise go
by. -- Steven Wright

LOL! Thanks for the laughter, hon...

re: #121 PrinceofGotham

Glad this works, now it is back to reality.

Must be lockdown time

re: #116 eon

If you call a dog, it comes to you.

If you call a cat, its service takes a message, and it promises to call you back. Maybe.

/To get the cat to come, open a can of tuna. Be braced for the sonic boom as he goes Machbusting about the time he hits the kitty door.

cheers

eon

If cats had opposable thumbs, they would strangle their masters in their sleep. They want the credit cards, the remote And the liquor.

Brilliance, thy name is "Iowahawk."

re: #125 opnion

If cats had opposable thumbs, they would strangle their masters in their sleep. They want the credit cards, the remote And the liquor.

There actually are cats with apposable thumbs. Google Hemingway cats.

House Republican leader John A. Boehner of Ohio escalated the war on ACORN today, calling for it to be cut off from all federal money and going so far as to call for a ban on ACORN contracting with candidates for federal office.

The organization "cannot be trusted with another dollar of the taxpayers’ money," says Boehner.

ACORN receives federal money through the affordable housing trust fund after that money has been sent to states and local governments. So Congress, to keep the group from getting money, would need to specifically forbid ACORN from being eligible to get federal funds.

"Contracting for services between candidates for federal office and ACORN, as Sen. Obama has done, must end," says Boehner. "Now that the taxpayers own Fannie Mae, any funding from Fannie Mae’s nonprofit foundation to ACORN must stop."

Can You say "Hatch Act" ?

Wasn't there a sheriff in Georgia(?) being investigated over a McCain campaign appearance .. meanwhile ACORN takes federal funds .. like the sheriff .. and then gets paid to do work for the Obama campaign .. unlike the sheriff, who does it for free.

re: #25 null

You're being funny, but a left wing youth organization here in Norway actually had pets as registered members and got government grants based on the inflated membership numbers. It ended up in court.

re: #118 null

Voice of experience. How many camels did your father give with you? I am modern man. I want a tractor.

Not quite, oh Prince.

I buy the man. You bring the tractor.

existential status

Heh.

Double heh.

re: #128 Neo_

Can You say "Hatch Act" ?

Wasn't there a sheriff in Georgia(?) being investigated over a McCain campaign appearance .. meanwhile ACORN takes federal funds .. like the sheriff .. and then gets paid to do work for the Obama campaign .. unlike the sheriff, who does it for free.

And to top it off...ACORN has endorsed obama for Pres.
[Link: www.acorn.org...]

How in the hell is THAT legal when they take federal funds?

re: #51 null

I had a black cat once..I think 95% of all Black Cats are voting for Obama.
/

We have a cat that is part black and part white. We are not quite sure which way she is going this election season. She tried to bite my husband, who is white, so that might be true about the black cat theory. LOL! And she hates the other cat that is orange and white.

LOL! You guys are so funny! Thanks to Iowahawk and all of you for providing much needed laughter today.

re: #63 null

~Bill Cosby

Humor is what gets you through cancer.

re: #114 null

Meanwhile, my USAA Precious Metals mutual fund has completely tanked. I though this one would thrive in this mess. Not hardly.

That makes two of us I'm down about 40-50%.
Still love USAA though.

re: #133 freeus

Had a cat that was a tuxedo, cat was better dressed than I ever am and she was meaner than spit.

Actual lawsuit in 5...4...3...

re: #25 null
Well, the cat was coughing up a hairball while Obama spoke but that can't be an opinion can it?)

You'd better have a chat with that racist feline of yours, Tim

///

Ok, with all this voter fraud stuff I have to ask: why doesn't the US have a single, non-partisan organisation responsible for all this stuff?

Here we have the independent Australian Electoral Commission: it registers voters, checks the electoral roll, draws electoral boundaries, conducts the election, counts the votes and reports the results. There's no political interference- things like redistricting are open to public comment and suggestions, so there's little possibility of gerrymander. Recently we've had a couple of situations where a party has won more votes but lost the election, because of how seats are drawn, but everyone accepts the results because they have faith in the AEC. No "Bush stole Florida' moments here.

It just seems very odd to outsiders that in the US voter registration, redistricting, etc are often in the hands of partisans, who will obviously favour their own side. And I'm sure the Republicans have been just as bad at times, so let's not get too pious here. Has there been any serious move to implement an independent electoral body in the US? Is it likely in the future?

Iowahawk: Pure, twisted genius!

It'd be even funnier if it didn't have a HUGE kernel of truth in it...

I am going to be a poll watcher for McCain/Palin on Nov. 4. Just got phone call telling me to pick up my credentials. Please advise - should I bring a hammer for the Acorns?

Imaginary voters
Never turn you down
When all the others turn you away
They're around
Democrats' great pleasure
Midnight strategem
Someone to share their socialist dreams
With them
Imaginary voter
Party line, anytime
Imaginary voter

When ordinary voters
Don't feel what you feel
And real-life conversations lose their thrill
...

OK, I had to stop there, because I don't really need to change any of the lyrics except replacing "lover" with "voter".
/scary

re: #139 AussieMarcus

Good question deserves an answer. I'll give it a shot. America's great gift to the world is Federalism. Other countries have federal structures with a central government and states but with rare exceptions they are top down structures in which local units exist as created and tolerated agents of a higher authority. America is closer to the Swiss model. There are limits on local authority, the original Articles of Confederation needed tightening. The Civil War confirmed the autonomy and authority of the central government. Still it is accepted that seperate communities voluntarily formed a Union and that the local units should run their own affairs. While the pressures of improved communications and the desire of lawyers to push for a uniform system of justice have reduced variance there is still far more autonomy and individuality in local government than outsiders sometimes realize.

re: #86 null

A doll some are claiming utters pro-Islam and even satanic messages has outraged parents in Oklahoma and Pennsylvania.
How can they tell which is which?

Both are the same, near as I can tell. I would say "in mt humble opinion", but I think I can back this one up.

Fantastic parody !

Too close to the truth though!

ROFLMAO

I sent the first paragraph along with a link to everyone on my email list...
Can't wait to see how many respond without reading the whole story.
Yeah I know it's wrong...

re: #144 null

Both are the same, near as I can tell. I would say "in mt humble opinion", but I think I can back this one up.

Many years ago, I heard of a similar "bad baby doll." This one reportedly said "Kill our mommy!" A lot of people complained about it.

Turns out it was actually made in Mexico, and some of the phrases it said were in Spanish, including the apparent "Kill our mommy" line, which so I gather, was actually Spanish for "I love you, Mommy!" It just happened it sounded enough like "Kill our mommy" that people who didn't speak Spanish heard it as that. :-|

I suspect this "Islamic baby doll" thing will turn out to be something like that.

Blazing Scandal --- the Picture

TimO #25
It is obvious that both of your pets are racist.

This ought to be good for some laughs. Are they mental or what?

We can only hope that the majority of these votes will be as ephemeral as the registered voters [sic]... and that the lead that The One supposedly has is as imaginary as his disciples' bona fides.

re: #143 lifeofthemind

So true. The second greatest gift was the Gipper, followed by The Big Mac.

re: #33 Spiny Norman

Civil Rights for Leprechauns!

Or we'll make you wear the Green Shoes.

And what about vegetables? Broccoli have rights too!

re: #149 aboo-Hoo-Hoo

Blazing Scandal --- the Picture

All hat, no cattle.

How come nobody's played the racist angle? Surely if the Dallas Cowboys can all be registered in Nevada, the Washington Redskins should be allowed to as well.

Considering that Conservatives are considerably smarter, more visionary, and so forth than foaming at the mouth libs...

We can imagine far more than they can.

Does this mean that we can register and vote as many times as we can imagine another reason to?

I can imagine thousands of reasons to vote against the Obamaantichrist.

Avatar Test

Authorities Catch Obama Registering Homeless Obamas

re: #158 Ojoe

Avatar Test

My favorite "holy man." Are you familiar with his prayer "My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me and I cannot know for certain where it will end. ..." It's from his Thoughts in Solitude.

Iowahawk hits the ball out of the park!

The danger with satirising the Left is you may just be giving them ideas.

ha ha funny. now time for a bloody mary.