These days, The Onion is looking more and more like a legitimate news source.

/Well, you compare it to the Obamedia...

Wow that horse looks focused. Holyfield is fucked.

/

PETA explodes in 5,4,3,2,1...

The Onion has sports news parody down as well as they do regular news.

Hilarious.

Now, if the glue factory awaited the loser... /

"That's how you beat a horse." LOL

That horse is dead!

LOL!

PETA writing a letter right now to Coke and the Onion for "promoting" this barbaric sprort!

Is this like Chess-Boxing?

Will they fight first, or race first? If the latter, I give the advantage to the horse.

re: #7 Ben Hur

That horse is dead!

LOL!

Freakin' hilarious!

How many people does that lion have to eat before he gets a shot at the title?

re: #11 experiencedtraveller

How many people does that lion have to eat before he gets a shot at the title?

Double points for Christians? //

Arnold, showing how it's done.

Holyfield is a nice guy, by the way. I still can't believe the whole Tyson ear biting thing. Bizarre.

Good thing it is not a battle of wits...

re: #15 saylorfam

Good thing it is not a battle of wits...

In that case the horse is a sure bet.

I'd say it's a side show, but neigh. It's the mane event.

re: #17 Sharmuta

I'd say it's a side show, but neigh. It's the mane event.

Please, please, it is too early in this thread to trot out the horse puns.

re: #17 Sharmuta

I'd say it's a side show, but neigh. It's the mane event.

The fans are chomping at the bit!

re: #14 Ward Cleaver

Holyfield is a nice guy, by the way. I still can't believe the whole Tyson ear biting thing. Bizarre.

He better be !!

Holyfield now has nine children -- the newborn Elijah Jedidiah to his wife, Janice; three with his first wife, Paulette, from whom he has been divorced since 1991; and five others born out of wedlock to four women.

That was great! I probably laughed a little too loud in my cube...

re: #15 saylorfam

Good thing it is not a battle of wits...

no contest. I'll bet on horse sense

This is no contest.

Evening Dream comes in at 16 hands.
Holyfield only has two.

"Tom Coughlin retires from family to spend more time with team"
hahaha!

re: #20 sattv4u2

He better be !!

Holyfield now has nine children -- the newborn Elijah Jedidiah to his wife, Janice; three with his first wife, Paulette, from whom he has been divorced since 1991; and five others born out of wedlock to four women.

He likes spreading the love. Obviously the ladies like him.

Guess what? The flying imams are back!

Judge clears way for lawsuit by 6 imams arrested at Mpls. airport

In a strongly worded ruling, a federal judge on Friday cleared the way for a lawsuit by six Muslim men who claim they were falsely arrested on a US Airways jet in Minneapolis three years ago to move forward

Just lovely!

i hope the horse doesn't bite his ear off like tyson did

re: #14 Ward Cleaver

Holyfield is a nice guy, by the way. I still can't believe the whole Tyson ear biting thing. Bizarre.

Tyson said he did it because he couldn't stand to think of his children seeing him lose. Holyfield pointed out that his kids now had a father whose ear looked 'like a damn Doberman's'.

Holyfield was the first boxer to legitamize bodybuilding training for boxers.

Lee Haney (multiple Mr Olympia winner) was his trainer.

Love Holyfield.

re: #19 Ward Cleaver

The fans are chomping at the bit!

Oh that's going to stirr-up some rivalries for sure.

Holyfield was a great fighter...he scared the shit out of Mike Tyson...knocked Iron Mike on his ass...I loved it...anybody remember that fight?

The Horse by KO in three rounds.

re: #29 Ben Hur

Holyfield was the first boxer to legitamize bodybuilding training for boxers.

Lee Haney (multiple Mr Olympia winner) was his trainer.

Love Holyfield.

Don't forget about Rocky!

"We steam clean the stain of deception from the carpet of sports."

Heh.

re: #25 Ward Cleaver

He likes spreading the love. Obviously the ladies like him.

He is a very good-looking man, one has to admit...

re: #30 BlueCanuck

Oh that's going to stirr-up some rivalries for sure.

He has been saddled with rivalries his whole career. Does he need more?

re: #27 _RememberTonyC

i hope the horse doesn't bite his ear off like tyson did

If the horse did it, I would chalk it up to normal horse behavior. Horses don't like being punched.

What Tyson's excuse is, I hesitate to say.

re: #14 Ward Cleaver

Holyfield is a nice guy, by the way. I still can't believe the whole Tyson ear biting thing. Bizarre.

I know the guy who has the piece of Holyfield's ear that was bitten off. If any of you live near Boca Raton, FL you can go to the sports museum that houses it. It's in a place called "Sports Immortals" on Federal Hwy (US Rte 1) in Boca.

re: #35 SanFranciscoZionist

He is a very good-looking man, one has to admit...

George Costanza had a secret man love for him..

re: #37 SanFranciscoZionist

If the horse did it, I would chalk it up to normal horse behavior. Horses don't like being punched.

What Tyson's excuse is, I hesitate to say.

mental illness for starters ...

re: #32 acwgusa

The Horse by KO in three rounds.

Now,if Holyfield gets his gloves, does the horse get to keep its shoes?

re: #26 Kenneth

The most important, and most bizarrely sad, part of this story is the presumption of perfection that the Gov't. applies to private industry. Even if they got it wrong with these guys, must that be a crime? Is the Government ever held to that standard of perfection? When a politician promises that test results will rise if taxes are increased, and then they don't, is he arrested for fraud?

I've been to a Horse Rock Concert.

LollApaloosa.

"Break out those envelopes you'd like to re-seal, and let's head to the steam room!"

Holyfield acuses horse of getting his face during weigh-in.

re: #7 Ben Hur

That horse is dead!

LOL!

Keep punching until it dies.

/wtf

Holyfield doesn't have a chance. He's a good fighter, but he's no Mongo.

re: #45 debutaunt

Holyfield accuses horse of getting his face during weigh-in.

PIMF

re: #4 Sharmuta

The Onion has sports news parody down as well as they do regular news.

Hilarious.

I hardly ever watch ESPN, but when I watched that I assumed it was very close to their programming.

ONN rocks!

re: #43 SasquatchOnSteroids

I've been to a Horse Rock Concert.

LollApaloosa.

re: #45 debutaunt

Holyfield acuses horse of getting his face during weigh-in.

evander walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?"

The Onion should do more sports news parody, because I found that really funny. I want more Steam Room.

re: #31 albusteve

I don't remember that one. When I was taking boxing classes (when I was in Krav Maga training) my instructor always said that Tyson only had one good punch - an uppercut. He thinks that as a person "Tyson's a punk" but he respected his knockout uppercut.

re: #52 Sharmuta

OT ,, and btw ,,,

going back to yeasterdays discussion about defining conservatism, may I suggest a couple of books by Harry Jaffa, esp How to Think About the American Revolution and, Original Intent and the Framers of the Constitution: A Disputed Question

I think Evander will beat that Beast of Burden- you can Bette on it

Does the horse bite--Evander's already been there.

re: #43 SasquatchOnSteroids

I've been to a Horse Rock Concert.

LollApaloosa.

Did anyone there play "Stone Pony Blues" by Charley Patton?

re: #37 SanFranciscoZionist

This is what I get for working and not paying attention to this.

The back end of that horse is a dead ringer for Minnesota's junior senator...

re: #57 Mad Al-Jaffee

Did anyone there play "Stone Pony Blues" by Charley Patton?

A horse is a horse of course, of course.

The horse is a one-trick pony.

Of course. Holyfield fighting a horse-- he could go down like Catherine the Great.

Tyson came up from the ghetto...a guy with absolutely nothing going for him but beating people up, and he was very good at it...when he worked his way to the to he seemed unstoppable...at the bell he rushed his opponent and pounded away...a merciless fighter and puncher...he was ferocious and imtimidating...a beast, an animal and he scared the shit out of people...boxers, handlers, fans...good lord what IS this guy...

along comes Holyfield who was a bit older...a tough guy who knew how to box...critics pinned him for not having any competition altho he had some darn good fights...nobody gave him much credit before the Tyson fight...but Tyson was a knockout artist...Holyfield outboxed Tyson in that first fight, Tyson got too aggressive and fell right into Holyfields trap...BOOM and Tyson was rocked..BOOM BOOM and he was hurt, his hands dropped and he backed away to get his senses...Holy field moved in with a series of very hard punches and Tyson went down...unbelievable!...one of the truly great moments in boxing lore...Iron Mike on his ass...he was done right then and there

OT: Honor Killing: Gazan killed daughter for owning phone'

Condemned by Palestinian Human Rights organizations. You might ask where Human Rights Watch was during all this. From the article . . .

The New York-based Human Rights Watch reported Wednesday that the Syrian government abolished a law that waived punishment for some honor killings and now allows judges to sentence perpetrators to at least two years jail.

Given that their admitted goal is to counter pro-Israeli sentiment around the world, it is not surprising that they would not condemn this.

re: #17 Sharmuta

I'd say it's a side show, but neigh. It's the mane event.

night mare pun

re: #64 taxfreekiller

Maxine Waters ::: Rear End Of a Cow.

debate

Cynthia McKinney - what comes out of a bull.

re: #65 Eowyn2

night mare pun

We are in a gelded age of humor.

re: #67 calcajun

We are in a gelded age of humor.

Back in a BIT.

re: #66 Mad Al-Jaffee

Cynthia McKinney - what comes out of a bull.

Barbara Boxer - front end of a bitch.

Do you ever wonder if artists like Gino Vanelli ever look back on their late 70's concert footage and cringe?

The best things about Vanelli were his compositions and the really great musicians he had backing him.

re: #69 eschew_obfuscation

Barbara Boxer - front end of a bitch.

Nancy Pelosi
Face Of Doom

re: #68 Mad Al-Jaffee

Back in a BIT.

Just to stirrup some trouble.

You would think the Onion would be able to squeeze a few more plugs and commercials for Coca-Cola Zero in there. /s

re: #55 Sharmuta

I think Evander will beat that Beast of Burden- you can Bette on it

[Video]

Nope. He might be able to take a Quarterhorse, but an entire, complete horse ?

Ass-whoopin'

//

re: #66 Mad Al-Jaffee

Cynthia McKinney - what comes out of a bull.

Arlen Specter - the elephant's droppings

Good afternoon, lizards!

Have you heard the latest?
Charles is a commie... whoda thunkit?

///

re: #75 LGoPs

Arlen Specter - the elephant's droppings

I always thought he was spooky.

re: #76 Irish Rose

Good afternoon, lizards!

Have you heard the latest?
Charles is a commie... whoda thunkit?

///

I don't think he is... I never see him at any of the meetings...

re: #76 Irish Rose

Good afternoon, lizards!

Have you heard the latest?
Charles is a commie... whoda thunkit?

///

So this proves that not only are all 57 states in the Birther conspiracy but so is Charles... thats why he tells us to ignore it... See.. PROOF!!!

//

re: #76 Irish Rose

Good afternoon, lizards!

Have you heard the latest?
Charles is a commie... whoda thunkit?

///

Hiya Irish! Hope today finds you well

re: #73 Lawrence Schmerel

You would think the Onion would be able to squeeze a few more plugs and commercials for Coca-Cola Zero in there. /s

I think the ads add credibility. Makes them appear real. Fools folks all day long.

I remember many of Alis great fights...I followed all that in the 70s and 80s...Liston and the phantom punch and his defending his title then losing it because of politics...his famous comeback and rope a dope...his fights with Frazier and Foreman and Holmes...Ken Norton broke his jaw in Yankee Stadium and he soldiered on for several more rounds...he had Shavers on the ropes and went for the kill, like a speed bag, he hit Shavers a hundred times and Ernie would not go down...those fights were truly historic, but I have to put the first Tyson/Holyfield fight right up there in the mix...certainly not the Thrilla in Manilla but watching Tyson fold was a hell of a thing

re: #81 unrealizedviewpoint

I think the ads add credibility. Makes them appear real. Fools folks all day long.

I can see why people are fooled by The Onion. Too much TV and not enough book reading and personal research. Sad state of affairs when people are fooled by something that is obviously a complete farce.

re: #79 MikeAlv77

So this proves that not only are all 57 states in the Birther conspiracy but so is Charles... thats why he tells us to ignore it... See.. PROOF!!!

//

Actually no, apparently the haters at Deuce have decided that he's a commie, because

1. he has certain books loaded on his Kindle
2. they say so

re: #76 Irish Rose

Good afternoon, lizards!

Have you heard the latest?
Charles is a commie... whoda thunkit?

///

From here on, every thread will not commence until this is played

re: #80 HoosierHoops

Hiya Hoops, back atcha!

re: #84 Irish Rose

Actually no, apparently the haters at Deuce have decided that he's a commie, because

1. he has certain books loaded on his Kindle
2. they say so

That reminds me. Have to return the copy of "Das Kapital" to the library. Who gets it next?

/

re: #87 BlueCanuck

That reminds me. Have to return the copy of "Das Kapital" to the library. Who gets it next?

/

Rahm Emmanual. His copy is worn out

re: #63 Creeping Eruption

OT: Honor Killing: Gazan killed daughter for owning phone'

Condemned by Palestinian Human Rights organizations. You might ask where Human Rights Watch was during all this. From the article . . .

Given that their admitted goal is to counter pro-Israeli sentiment around the world, it is not surprising that they would not condemn this.

"The groups' reports said that the assault was triggered by Jawdat Najjar's discovery that his daughter Fadia - a 27-year-old divorced mother of five - owned a cell phone. He suspected she used it to speak to a man outside the family, according to the groups' reports."

There is something physically wrong with a society which allows (and encourages) a man to control his adult daughter like this.

re: #62 albusteve

You described that very well. There may be a job for you in The Steam Room.

Hmm, I wonder how this fight was arranged. I didn't think Don King knew Michael Vick.

re: #68 Mad Al-Jaffee

Back in a BIT.

reign them in guys

re: #90 wrenchwench

You described that very well. There may be a job for you in The Steam Room.

A different "birch" society, eh.

re: #92 Eowyn2

reign them in guys

Hard to do when they are roweled up.

re: #89 Eowyn2

"The groups' reports said that the assault was triggered by Jawdat Najjar's discovery that his daughter Fadia - a 27-year-old divorced mother of five - owned a cell phone. He suspected she used it to speak to a man outside the family, according to the groups' reports."

There is something physically wrong with a society which allows (and encourages) a man to control his adult daughter like this.

I do not think there are even words in our language to describe such a "society."

re: #84 Irish Rose

Actually no, apparently the haters at Deuce have decided that he's a commie, because

1. he has certain books loaded on his Kindle
2. they say so

To borrow a phrase from my distinguished colleague Mandy; the haters at Deuce can go "piss up a rope".

re: #91 JustABill

Hmm, I wonder how this fight was arranged. I didn't think Don King knew Michael Vick.

That's why I have no dog in this fight.

re: #84 Irish Rose

Actually no, apparently the haters at Deuce have decided that he's a commie, because

1. he has certain books loaded on his Kindle
2. they say so

Just poked my toe into that cesspool. The level of obsession there is staggering.

a 27-year-old divorced mother of five

Hate it here, love it there.

One day a man passed by a farm and saw a beautiful horse. Hoping to buy the animal, he said to the farmer, "I think your horse looks pretty good, so I'll give you $500 for him. "He doesn't look so good, and he's not for sale," the farmer said. The man insisted, "I think he looks just fine, and I'll up the price to $1,000." "He doesn't look so good," the farmer said, "but if you want him that much, he's yours." The next day the man came back raging mad. He went up to the farmer and screamed, "You sold me a blind horse. You cheated me!" The farmer calmly replied, "I told you he didn't look so good, didn't I?"

re: #84 Irish Rose

Actually no, apparently the haters at Deuce have decided that he's a commie, because

1. he has certain books loaded on his Kindle
2. they say so

The Douche is known for deep critical thinking...

/In Soviet Russia ROFLcopter laughs at you

re: #90 wrenchwench

You described that very well. There may be a job for you in The Steam Room.

few pay attention...every thread is a joke fest...I post therefor I am

Brent Favre plays winner!

re: #103 jones

Brent Favre plays winner!

Does he have a brothre named Brett?

re: #103 jones

Brent Favre plays winner!

Nothing about bret favre is "winner" He is a fucking tool.

re: #105 Creeping Eruption

Nothing about bret favre is "winner" He is a fucking tool.

for who?

re: #95 Creeping Eruption

I do not think there are even words in our language to describe such a "society."

"Barbaric" gets pretty close.

re: #103 jones

Brent Favre plays winner!

He'll call at the last minute and decline.

re: #107 VegasRick

"Barbaric" gets pretty close.

Pretty close, but . . .

re: #105 Creeping Eruption

Nothing about bret favre is "winner" He is a fucking tool.

Maybe this Brent Favre guy will be a winner now that Brett Farve is a Failmeister.

Granholm has failed...and BOs economic surge seems to have left his constituents in the dust

[Link: money.cnn.com...]

re: #104 sattv4u2

Google "We'll never forget you, brent."

re: #110 ArchangelMichael

Maybe this Brent Favre guy will be a winner now that Brett Farve is a Failmeister.

pretty harsh...did you play in the NFL?

re: #112 jones

Google "We'll never forget you, brent."

ahhh ,, that lil tidbit would have been VERY useful BEFORE you posted your #103

re: #105 Creeping Eruption

Watch it. He is still a local hero to my wife's family. Granted, he does not know when it is time to leave the party, but that's too strong.

re: #89 Eowyn2

"The groups' reports said that the assault was triggered by Jawdat Najjar's discovery that his daughter Fadia - a 27-year-old divorced mother of five - owned a cell phone. He suspected she used it to speak to a man outside the family, according to the groups' reports."

There is something physically wrong with a society which allows (and encourages) a man to control his adult daughter like this.

All the "human rights groups" will find a way to blame this on "Jewish settlement growth."

re: #95 Creeping Eruption

I do not think there are even words in our language to describe such a "society."

evil

re: #113 albusteve

pretty harsh...did you play in the NFL?

no ,, but he did saty at a Holiday Inn Express last night

re: #113 albusteve

pretty harsh...did you play in the NFL?

Irrelevant. I can spot I guy that should have retired in glory a few years ago but couldn't let go because he thought he'd age like wine.

re: #115 calcajun

Watch it. He is still a local hero to my wife's family. Granted, he does not know when it is time to leave the party, but that's too strong.

I'm from Wisconsin. He is a traitorous bastard!

re: #113 albusteve

pretty harsh...did you play in the NFL?

I hate (not really) Brett Farve. I had season tix for the Bucs for 8 years. I think we went 1-7 in that time vs. The Pack.

re: #116 Alouette

Goes without saying.

re: #119 ArchangelMichael

Irrelevant. I can spot I guy that should have retired in glory a few years ago but couldn't let go because he thought he'd age like wine.

so that induces your distain?...pretty shallow...you don't strike me as much of a football fan...that's cool

re: #114 sattv4u2

ahhh ,, that lil tidbit would have been VERY useful BEFORE you posted your #103

Sorry, I was being Wisconsincentric.

re: #115 calcajun

Watch it. He is still a local hero to my wife's family. Granted, he does not know when it is time to leave the party, but that's too strong.

His unknowing just saddens me. I really wish that he'd do commercials instead. I've always liked and respected him. I can understand his going to another team since Rogers was taking over the starting but I still think he got hosed. The Packer Mgmt (of which I wish I were a stockholder) could have found a way to keep him in town.

re: #125 buzzsawmonkey

There's some new version of "The Princess and the Pea" waiting to be written, in which the princess wants a princess phone and her father bludgeons her to death with it as soon as it's installed.

The "Princess and the Chick-Pea?"

re: #125 buzzsawmonkey

There's some new version of "The Princess and the Pea" waiting to be written, in which the princess wants a princess phone and her father bludgeons her to death with it as soon as it's installed.

Would be a better parralel to the original if he used a bag of frozen peas!

re: #119 ArchangelMichael

Irrelevant. I can spot I guy that should have retired in glory a few years ago but couldn't let go because he thought he'd age like wine.

I've known guys that should have retired from the bar scene 20 years ago but that doesn't induce hatred.

re: #108 Cannadian Club Akbar

He'll call at the last minute and decline.

Frankly- the Vikings lucked out. He has a terrible record in the dome there, and I don't know what they were thinking.

re: #131 Sharmuta

Frankly- the Vikings lucked out. He has a terrible record in the dome there, and I don't know what they were thinking.

Revenge.

re: #108 Cannadian Club Akbar

He'll call at the last minute and decline.

Already did ;-)

re: #125 buzzsawmonkey

Princess Bride of Chucky perhaps.

My name is Achmed Montoya. You called my father. Prepare to die.

re: #120 Creeping Eruption

I'm from Wisconsin. He is a traitorous bastard!

yeah...so was Montana and Emmitt Smith, and OJ etc etc

re: #128 sattv4u2

Would be a better parralel to the original if he used a bag of frozen peas!

Brought to you by the Religion of Peas

re: #120 Creeping Eruption

I'm from Wisconsin. He is a traitorous bastard!

My two favorite teams

The Packers
Anyone playing the Vikings

re: #131 Sharmuta

re: #133 eschew_obfuscation

I already knew that. Thank you peeps. Now see my #121.

re: #131 Sharmuta

Frankly- the Vikings lucked out. He has a terrible record in the dome there, and I don't know what they were thinking.

They were thinking that if his shoulder was reasonably sound, he is
A) a cut above what they have
B) a major ticket draw
C) a thumb in the eye to a divisional rival
WIN WIN WIN

re: #123 albusteve

so that induces your distain?...pretty shallow...you don't strike me as much of a football fan...that's cool

Whether I'm "much of a football fan" or not does not preclude me from having an opinion about whether an NFL player in his 40s whos goign down hill should have quit during one of the handful of times hes feigned retiring in the past.

If he didn't do the:

I'm retiring... no i'm not
Now I'm retiring... PSYCHE
No I mean it this time... nope, Minnesota now...

dance, I'd have a little more respect for the guy. It's rough watching a great one go down like that. I was pissed at Junior Seau for doing the same shit too.

re: #136 albusteve

yeah...so was Montana and Emmitt Smith, and OJ etc etc

You don't screw the fans to get revenge on a 3rd party. If he was mad at Ted, take it up with Ted. Not the fans.

re: #138 Eowyn2

My two favorite teams

The Packers
Anyone playing the Vikings

Reminds me of a joke I heard:
Shortly after 9-11 the Dallas Cowboys were conducting practice and noticed a white powdery substance on the field. They notified the authorities who dispatched a hazmat team. After close inspection the investigators declared the area safe. The powdery substance was the end zone chalk line and it was determined that the Cowboys were in no danger of coming into contact with it.
nyuk, nyuk.

my son was a high school super star, All Conference safety two years...played offense as well...won his Scholar/Athlete Award from the US Army and was recruited by the, Air Force, Navy, and several MAC schools and a bunch of DivII schools...he chose to go to the University of Michigan to be a dentist and his playing days were over...after his last game he came home and sat on the edge of his bed and cried like a baby...it was very difficult to give it up...jus sayin

re: #141 ArchangelMichael

Whether I'm "much of a football fan" or not does not preclude me from having an opinion about whether an NFL player in his 40s whos goign down hill should have quit during one of the handful of times hes feigned retiring in the past.

If he didn't do the:

I'm retiring... no i'm not
Now I'm retiring... PSYCHE
No I mean it this time... nope, Minnesota now...

dance, I'd have a little more respect for the guy. It's rough watching a great one go down like that. I was pissed at Junior Seau for doing the same shit too.

your opinion means nothing to me

re: #143 LGoPs

Reminds me of a joke I heard:
Shortly after 9-11 the Dallas Cowboys were conducting practice and noticed a white powdery substance on the field. They notified the authorities who dispatched a hazmat team. After close inspection the investigators declared the area safe. The powdery substance was the end zone chalk line and it was determined that the Cowboys were in no danger of coming into contact with it.
nyuk, nyuk.

Do you know why the Vikings stopped raiding other countries in Europe?

They started painting goal lines on the borders.

re: #120 Creeping Eruption

Look at the bright side-- he never competed again the the NFC North--and he never put up the numbers he did while at Green Bay.

Hey, I love the Pack (only when they're not playing my Saints/Chargers) but, both you and Brett have got to let it go. Besides-- Rodgers is not the future of the team, IMHO.

re: #146 Sharmuta

Do you know why the Vikings stopped raiding other countries in Europe?

They started painting goal lines on the borders.

LOL...

re: #125 buzzsawmonkey

There's some new version of "The Princess and the Pea" waiting to be written, in which the princess wants a princess phone and her father bludgeons her to death with it as soon as it's installed.

Hitchcock would have used a block of frozen peas, then cooked them to serve the detectives.

re: #126 Eowyn2

Me, too. But looks like he's sitting this year out now.

re: #141 ArchangelMichael

Whether I'm "much of a football fan" or not does not preclude me from having an opinion about whether an NFL player in his 40s whos goign down hill should have quit during one of the handful of times hes feigned retiring in the past.

If he didn't do the:

I'm retiring... no i'm not
Now I'm retiring... PSYCHE
No I mean it this time... nope, Minnesota now...

dance, I'd have a little more respect for the guy. It's rough watching a great one go down like that. I was pissed at Junior Seau for doing the same shit too.

If you were forced from a job you love and thereby 'retired' then another company came along and said, hey, you don't have to retire, come work for us for a little bit, heck, try it out. Then you'd probably unretire as well.

Why are the Vikings purple?

You'd be purple too if you were choking for 45 years.

re: #149 debutaunt

Tarantino would have made a homage to the whirred peas, right before they met a bloody end at the business end of a blender.

re: #128 sattv4u2

Would be a better parralel to the original if he used a bag of frozen peas!

As he screamed "Peas be Upon You"

re: #151 Eowyn2
Forced? My heinder.

re: #152 jones

Why are the Vikings purple?

You'd be purple too if you were choking for 45 years.

Everyone but Eagles fans may laugh at this.

re: #142 jones

It's the kids that suffer in a divorce, too. It's always the fans that get wet in pissing matched between players and the front office.

Maybe the Vikes could sign Vick.

re: #130 buzzsawmonkey

If the settlements hadn't expanded, there would be no cell phone network coverage, and a cell phone would have been useless. It is only because the cell phone was capable of functioning that this woman wanted one; therefore, since settlement expansion is responsible for the cell phone network, it is responsible for her death.

See? Easy.

and so thought provoking.
/

Brett Favre was one of the all time greats...and he was one of the best things going in the NFL in his career...a rare combination of smart, tough and really alot of fun...he did it all and he won it all...he desreves better than petty sniping from pissed off fans with retirement issues...it's small and defies the spirit of the game and competition in general

re: #158 Cannadian Club Akbar

Maybe the Vikes could sign Vick.

No one will sign him right now. Two years out and no workout regimen? He's rusty.

re: #157 calcajun

If he is so mad at Ted, he should open taverns in every Wisconsin population center, have dollar beer night; and show up and bitch about Ted. Fans would be happy and Brett could make do his hatin'

re: #62 albusteve

But now, up from the ghetto, it seems Tyson has become a reasonable fellow. A little too late to help him as a boxer. Ain't life funny.

re: #160 albusteve

He got ear holed by Reagan Upshaw of the Bucs one game. The next week on Sports Center he said he didn't remember the hit, the rest of the game and half the next week. And the Pack won.

re: #162 jones

I hear ya. But the best revenge in that circumstance is to prove that he still has what it takes -- and playing for someone else in the NFL is the only way to do it.

re: #161 calcajun

No one will sign him right now. Two years out and no workout regimen? He's rusty.

You obviously don't know much about prison life!

re: #163 itellu3times

But now, up from the ghetto, it seems Tyson has become a reasonable fellow. A little too late to help him as a boxer. Ain't life funny.

he's a convicted rapist and a sick mother fucker...he gets nothing from me

re: #156 Sharmuta

Everyone but Eagles fans may laugh at this.

I am pleased to announce that as of a few minutes ago the Chicago Bears remain undefeated this year.

re: #166 sattv4u2

Not to NFL standards, it ain't. Yes-- I do know a bit. He would not be allowed the hours and hours he needs to keep in that level of shape in terms of running, weights and diet. I know he was not in a max security unit, but he still would have had to do prison work and not his work out regimen.

re: #167 albusteve

he's a convicted rapist and a sick mother fucker...he gets nothing from me

He's asked for something from you??

//

What the Vikings need to do is quit letting assistant coaches go off to other teams where they win Super Bowls- like Tony Dungey, Brian Billick, and Mike Tomlin. They let coaching talent go. Stupid.

It's session night at the pub, and I'm off.
Catch ya'll later tonight.

re: #168 LGoPs

I am pleased to announce that as of a few minutes ago the Chicago Bears remain undefeated this year.

As a HUGE Dolphins fan (born and raised in Miami, got to meet most of the 72' team) I am keeping a close eye on you guys!

re: #164 Cannadian Club Akbar

He got ear holed by Reagan Upshaw of the Bucs one game. The next week on Sports Center he said he didn't remember the hit, the rest of the game and half the next week. And the Pack won.

there are a ton of Favre moments...one time he ran around and was finally run down from behind and slammed with a vicious tackle...he laid there a moment and staggered up and over to the defensive huddle...he was laughing and bragging and and having fun right inside their huddle!...the ref came over and literally pulled him back to his side, while Brett was jawing and threatening and smiling...one tough SOB and everybody loved him...a good guy

re: #167 albusteve

I can't say I've followed his story beyond what I couldn't avoid, but I'm a sucker for extending sympathy to guys who appear to at least be making progress.

re: #169 calcajun

Not to NFL standards, it ain't. Yes-- I do know a bit. He would not be allowed the hours and hours he needs to keep in that level of shape in terms of running, weights and diet. I know he was not in a max security unit, but he still would have had to do prison work and not his work out regimen.

running and lifting ,, running and lifting. Probably more than he would usually do during a normal "offseason"

Yes, he would be rusty, but anyone signing him would be looking at him as a 3rd QB and to run an occasional wildcat play, NOT as the 16 game starting fulltime QB

re: #155 jones

Forced? My heinder.

you're right. Lets see, I work here for 10 yrs and 25 year old Jane Doe gets to take over all of my accounts because, well, the bosses want her to get more experience. I become her secretary but will trouble shoot when she may get in too deep.

That is how you force people to retire without actually making it verbal or physical.

re: #173 VegasRick

As a HUGE Dolphins fan (born and raised in Miami, got to meet most of the 72' team) I am keeping a close eye on you guys!

I've never seen the porpoise in being a Dolphins fan...

re: #105 Creeping Eruption

As much as the sports media made him and then decide they had enough and did a 180.

re: #173 VegasRick

As a HUGE Dolphins fan (born and raised in Miami, got to meet most of the 72' team) I am keeping a close eye on you guys!

Was Larry Csonka on that team? I think so but can't remember.

re: #141 ArchangelMichael

Whether I'm "much of a football fan" or not does not preclude me from having an opinion about whether an NFL player in his 40s whos goign down hill should have quit during one of the handful of times hes feigned retiring in the past.

If he didn't do the:

I'm retiring... no i'm not
Now I'm retiring... PSYCHE
No I mean it this time... nope, Minnesota now...

dance, I'd have a little more respect for the guy. It's rough watching a great one go down like that. I was pissed at Junior Seau for doing the same shit too.

I'm a lifelong Packer fan. I grew up in Wisconsin and was a child when Vince Lombardi was still coach. It gets in your blood. (Just explaining my basis for commenting. That, and I used to work for an ISP with its own sports page, and my focus was the NFL and MLB.)

I love Brett Favre, always will. I can see why the Vikings wanted him, as I think the season before last made a strong statement about his ability to still play the game at a high level - but I am so relieved that he is (keep your fingers crossed) finally exiting the stage, because I think his inability to walk away has really damaged his legacy, which should have been amazing. (And I followed closely what went down with Ted Thompson, so I know there is some blame there too.)

He has taped an ad for Sears, playing a guy who can't make up his mind what kind of television he wants (as I understand it). When the other actor in the ad complains about people who just don't know what they want, he reportedly replies with something like, "I know. I HATE that!"

It's good that he can joke about it. He's a funny guy, and that will go a long way toward restoring a lot of goodwill that has been lost.

I think your sentiment is one shared by a lot of people, and even among those inclined to like him. That should be a sign to him that he's done the right thing by backing out now.

re: #177 Eowyn2

you're right. Lets see, I work here for 10 yrs and 25 year old Jane Doe gets to take over all of my accounts because, well, the bosses want her to get more experience. I become her secretary but will trouble shoot when she may get in too deep.

That is how you force people to retire without actually making it verbal or physical.

So another company offers you the same postion you were downgraded from, at the same (or better) salary, and you do what?
Turn them down and saty as Janes trouble shooter??

re: #175 itellu3times

I can't say I've followed his story beyond what I couldn't avoid, but I'm a sucker for extending sympathy to guys who appear to at least be making progress.

Mike Tyson is psychotic...he is a danger to himself and anyone around him

re: #172 Irish Rose

Have one for me.

re: #180 LGoPs

Was Larry Csonka on that team? I think so but can't remember.

yes, most definately

re: #180 LGoPs

Was Larry Csonka on that team? I think so but can't remember.

Csonka, Kiick and Mercury Morris.

re: #176 sattv4u2

running and lifting ,, running and lifting. Probably more than he would usually do during a normal "offseason"

Yes, he would be rusty, but anyone signing him would be looking at him as a 3rd QB and to run an occasional wildcat play, NOT as the 16 game starting fulltime QB

he's perfect for the wildcat...he will find a job, as much as I think he should be shunned

re: #186 VegasRick

Csonka, Kiick and Mercury Morris.

the three amigos...wowzer, could they get it done

re: #181 capitalist piglet

as a die hard Viking fan (and by extension a Packer hater) I don't think it would have been very satisfying to win a super bowl with Brett Favre who will essentially always be a Packer...or worse, have high expectations and lose with Brett.

re: #186 VegasRick

Csonka, Kiick and Mercury Morris.

I think he now makes ciagr cases. My wife got me a nice leather traveling one for my birthday. Got his name stamped on it.
Pretty nice.

re: #188 albusteve

the three amigos...wowzer, could they get it done

Yep! Love that team.

re: #187 albusteve

I don't see him doing a Jim McMahon. Super XXXI when the Pack had the game wrapped up, Holgrem asked McMahon if he would like to take the last snap, McMahon declined.

re: #177 Eowyn2

He retired. No one forced him to. Once he retires, tough.

If the lady I replaced wanted to come back, tough.

Should have shut up and played.

re: #190 LGoPs

I think he now makes ciagr cases. My wife got me a nice leather traveling one for my birthday. Got his name stamped on it.
Pretty nice.

And he also makes cigar cases...sheesh.
*rolling my eyes*

re: #189 Charpete67

as a die hard Viking fan (and by extension a Packer hater) I don't think it would have been very satisfying to win a super bowl with Brett Favre who will essentially always be a Packer...or worse, have high expectations and lose with Brett.

Yeah, well, seeing Favre help get you your first ever Lombardi Trophy would have pretty much sucked for us, too. ; )

re: #191 VegasRick

Yep! Love that team.

of course the year before the Cowboys utterly stomped the very same team in the SB

re: #195 capitalist piglet

good point...no good can come of any of this...

re: #190 LGoPs

I think he now makes ciagr cases. My wife got me a nice leather traveling one for my birthday. Got his name stamped on it.
Pretty nice.

he's a big time sport fisherman as well...TV and all that

re: #195 capitalist piglet

Yeah, well, seeing Favre help get you your first ever Lombardi Trophy would have pretty much sucked for us, too. ; )

On the plus side of all this, I'm looking forward to another seaosn of seeing what Tavaris Jackson can do. ;)

re: #176 sattv4u2

running and lifting ,, running and lifting. Probably more than he would usually do during a normal "offseason"

Yes, he would be rusty, but anyone signing him would be looking at him as a 3rd QB and to run an occasional wildcat play, NOT as the 16 game starting fulltime QB

I doubt that he would have had the time in prison to exercise to the level at which he needed to stay professionally fit. But, I agree, the best he can hope for is 3rd string somewhere. I'm sure he'll be flexible on the price.

re: #197 Charpete67

good point...no good can come of any of this...

Believe me, I was holding my breath. I appreciate you saying he'll always be a Packer, because I do want to believe that. I am proud of him, and seeing him in a Jets uni was hard enough.

re: #199 RunningBare

On the plus side of all this, I'm looking forward to another seaosn of seeing what Tavaris Jackson can do. ;)

Oh my. Well, I did pay a visit to a Vikings board last night...all kinds of mixed feelings over there, as you can imagine.

re: #201 capitalist piglet

Believe me, I was holding my breath. I appreciate you saying he'll always be a Packer, because I do want to believe that. I am proud of him, and seeing him in a Jets uni was hard enough.

Emmitt went and played for the Cards...I about had a stroke...it is what it is...passion beyond what average people can comprehend

re: #181 capitalist piglet

I'm a lifelong Packer fan. I grew up in Wisconsin and was a child when Vince Lombardi was still coach. It gets in your blood. (Just explaining my basis for commenting. That, and I used to work for an ISP with its own sports page, and my focus was the NFL and MLB.)

Even though I'm a Chicagoan originally I've had a lifelong love for the the Packers. I think I imprinted on them when I was a kid and watched them play in the Ice Bowl with Bart Starr. Favre reminds me of Starr.

re: #204 LGoPs

Even though I'm a Chicagoan originally I've had a lifelong love for the the Packers. I think I imprinted on them when I was a kid and watched them play in the Ice Bowl with Bart Starr. Favre reminds me of Starr.

I was there, on TV anyway...Favre is better than Starr (I met Bart a year later at my aunts house...I had mixed feelings for a bit)

re: #171 Sharmuta

What the Vikings need to do is quit letting assistant coaches go off to other teams where they win Super Bowls- like Tony Dungey, Brian Billick, and Mike Tomlin. They let coaching talent go. Stupid.

Very nice. A side of you I didn't know about!

re: #206 Ben Hur

Very nice. A side of you I didn't know about!

the complete package...right there

re: #204 LGoPs

Even though I'm a Chicagoan originally I've had a lifelong love for the the Packers. I think I imprinted on them when I was a kid and watched them play in the Ice Bowl with Bart Starr. Favre reminds me of Starr.

Oh me too! A lot of similarities there!

I have the Starr re-issue Ice Bowl jersey that came out last year, if that tells you anything about me. I'm also a shareholder.

Very gracious post, LGoPs. Thank you.

re: #178 LGoPs

I've never seen the porpoise in being a Dolphins fan...

re: #201 capitalist piglet

Believe me, I was holding my breath. I appreciate you saying he'll always be a Packer, because I do want to believe that. I am proud of him, and seeing him in a Jets uni was hard enough.

but it made you actually watch the Jets didn't it?

Speaking of football news. Turns out that Michael Vick wont' be a QB in teh NFL this year. Rumours abound that while in prison, his workout routine was such that he will most likely be picked up by a team as a wide receiver.

re: #209 Eowyn2

but it made you actually watch the Jets didn't it?

It did. And I rooted for him there. But I drew the line at the Vikings.

Some things are just too damned much. LOL

re: #210 RunningBare

Speaking of football news. Turns out that Michael Vick wont' be a QB in teh NFL this year. Rumours abound that while in prison, his workout routine was such that he will most likely be picked up by a team as a wide receiver.

Boo, hiss. : )

re: #212 capitalist piglet

Boo, hiss. : )

You're not the one what had to listen to speculation all damned morning about how he might be interested in your team... grrr...

re: #200 calcajun

I doubt that he would have had the time in prison to exercise to the level at which he needed to stay professionally fit. But, I agree, the best he can hope for is 3rd string somewhere. I'm sure he'll be flexible on the price.

All he HAD in there was TIME!

This has to be from the Onion, as well...
[Link: www.foxnews.com...]

re: #215 tradewind

This has to be from the Onion, as well...
[Link: www.foxnews.com...]

Hmm, how could this be played for a free trip? Say I live in Georgia or Florida (or those other states where NY is flying the homeless) and I want to visit NY. I see some Broadway plays, the Rockettes, visit the Statue of Liberty. Then I sit on the sidewalk with a hand-lettered piece of cardboard and I get swooped up and sent back home for free.

re: #214 sattv4u2

Your time inside is very regimented, and you do have to do a prison job. You usually are not left with a lot of free time, let alone a lot of exercise time.

Upright Citzens Brigade did the Boxer versus Horse bit about ten years ago. I can't find the video, though. Funny.

Poor Holyfield. I really like him, but he should have stayed retired when they first diagnosed his heart problem.

re: #217 calcajun

Your time inside is very regimented, and you do have to do a prison job. You usually are not left with a lot of free time, let alone a lot of exercise time.

He wasn;t in a max security. Yes, he did have a job in there (laundry I beleive) but he had HOURS each day of free time

re: #31 albusteve

I sure do Steve. I lived in Atlanta at the time and had a large group of friends who used to come to place and order PPV fights all the time. But nobody gave Holyfield a chance against Tyson so I had to watch that one all by myself. I am currently writing a book about Evander; I wish he would hurry up and retire so I can write the ending!