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42 comments
1 livefreeor die  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:35:03pm

Yay! Something lighthearted!

2 cronus  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:38:13pm

The ending from the anchor is great: “if you have any questions about Google opt-out type it in an email to a friend and Google will get back to you in 24 hours.”

3 livefreeor die  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:39:47pm

It’s going to get really spooky when Google becomes self aware.

4 mrbaracuda  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:41:30pm

Funny. :-D

5 Sharmuta  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:41:39pm

Google might be big, but opting out of GE would be more difficult.

6 Bobblehead  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:42:32pm

That was good. Funny.

7 Charles Johnson  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:43:12pm

You have to watch it more than once, and read the crawl at the bottom…

8 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:45:59pm

Bury corpses by hand?
Does this mean I won’t be able to use a shovel?

9 KenJen  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:47:30pm

Nutritional value of the dollar is now greater than monetary value. Ha ha. Funny stuff.

10 Lee Coller  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:47:44pm

“If you have any questions, type them in an email to a friend, and Google will get back to you.”

11 Ward Cleaver  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:48:04pm

re: #8 pre-Boomer Marine brat

Bury corpses by hand?
Does this mean I won’t be able to use a shovel?

Only if they’re shovel-ready.

/heh

12 DaddyG  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:49:25pm

re: #7 Charles

You have to watch it more than once, and read the crawl at the bottom…

In the Ipod User Agreement. Dang he’s sneaky.

13 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:50:57pm

re: #7 Charles

You have to watch it more than once, and read the crawl at the bottom…

Do we have a scientist Lizard who’ll tell us beer is healthy?
That would be thread-worthy.

14 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:53:00pm

re: #7 Charles

You have to watch it more than once, and read the crawl at the bottom…

The funniest line is at the very end, too:

“If you want to opt out, describe your wishes in a private email to a friend and Google will get back to you within 24 hours.”

15 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:53:35pm

re: #2 cronus

The ending from the anchor is great: “if you have any questions about Google opt-out type it in an email to a friend and Google will get back to you in 24 hours.”

Drat! Scooped again.

16 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:55:02pm

re: #3 livefreeor die

It’s going to get really spooky when Google becomes self aware.

It’s going to fall in love with the Russian computer and take over the world!

Extra credit: Name that movie (referenced above) for 10 bonus points!

17 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:55:56pm

re: #10 Lee Coller

“If you have any questions, type them in an email to a friend, and Google will get back to you.”

Man, am I out of the loop this afternoon!

18 Jack Burton  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:56:13pm

re: #16 zombie

Colossus: The Forbin Project?

19 FrogMarch  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:57:08pm

Obama to slip universal health care into itunes user agreement.

Not funny.//

20 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:57:12pm

re: #18 ArchangelMichael

Colossus: The Forbin Project?

Bingo! Correct!

Ten Internet Bonus Points for you!

Sure, they’re worthless, but you can use them to buy opt-out coupons.

21 HoosierHoops  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:57:34pm

We bought a couple of Google servers to run the document searches on our internal Intranet…
They are faster than hell…And really cool looking…Bright yellow in a DataCenter always draws attention…

22 Sharmuta  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:58:32pm

Healthcare is getting slipped into iTunes service agreements- LOL!

23 Wendya  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:58:55pm

FDA approves Meth for treatment of excess teeth.

LOL!

24 reloadingisnotahobby  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 2:59:34pm

re: #13 pre-Boomer Marine brat
Beer is healthy!
There!

25 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:02:05pm

re: #21 HoosierHoops

We bought a couple of Google servers to run the document searches on our internal Intranet…
They are faster than hell…And really cool looking…Bright yellow in a DataCenter always draws attention…

Last “data center” I was inside was the one (in the early Eighties) where my OEM employer’s VAX lived.

/:D … I think that was about the time Conan the Barbarian came out

26 Kosh's Shadow  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:02:06pm

re: #16 zombie

It’s going to fall in love with the Russian computer and take over the world!

Extra credit: Name that movie (referenced above) for 10 bonus points!

Colossus, the Forbin Project.

27 quickjustice  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:02:27pm

re: #24 reloadingisnotahobby

Got hops?

28 Wendya  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:02:31pm

re: #16 zombie

It’s going to fall in love with the Russian computer and take over the world!

Extra credit: Name that movie (referenced above) for 10 bonus points!

Electric Dreams?

29 reloadingisnotahobby  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:03:20pm

re: #27 quickjustice

Don’t forget the barley!!
Oh! And fresh mountian spring water!!!

30 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:03:34pm

True fact not included in the Onion news crawl:

The Allies wanted to punish Germany financially after WW1, so in the Versailles Agreement they stripped German drug-maker Bayer of two very profitable patents: Aspirin and Heroin. Hence, starting in 1919, generic heroin could be made by any US company that wanted to.

End result: Millions of Americans became addicted to the over-the-counter heroin, and when it was later banned as illegal for home use, the underground drug trade sprung up to service the once-legal addicts!

Talk about the law of unintended consequences!

31 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:04:38pm

re: #26 Kosh’s Shadow

Colossus, the Forbin Project.

Correct, but too late off the starting line. (See comment #18.)

Only three Internet Bonus Points for you.

32 pre-Boomer Marine brat  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:05:21pm

re: #30 zombie

True fact not included in the Onion news crawl:

The Allies wanted to punish Germany financially after WW1, so in the Versailles Agreement they stripped German drug-maker Bayer of two very profitable patents: Aspirin and Heroin. Hence, starting in 1919, generic heroin could be made by any US company that wanted to.

End result: Millions of Americans became addicted to the over-the-counter heroin, and when it was later banned as illegal for home use, the underground drug trade sprung up to service the once-legal addicts!

Talk about the law of unintended consequences!

And IIRC, every movie back then had a heroin.

33 Kosh's Shadow  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:06:53pm

re: #31 zombie

Correct, but too late off the starting line. (See comment #18.)

Only three Internet Bonus Points for you.

Well, I’m trying to get work done, too.
(Microsoft makes it really hard for you to find how to write certain code that will still work on XP, especially if you don’t want to use .NET. I have to find documentation that doesn’t show up in the searches any more.)

34 Kosh's Shadow  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:07:56pm

re: #32 pre-Boomer Marine brat

And IIRC, every movie back then had a heroin.

Both a Hero and Heroine

35 doppelganglander  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:08:08pm

FDA approves meth for treatment of excess teeth.

36 Dianna  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:08:15pm

re: #20 zombie

Bingo! Correct!

Ten Internet Bonus Points for you!

Sure, they’re worthless, but you can use them to buy opt-out coupons.

Colossus fell in love with another computer? I saw that in junior high (much, much longer ago than I really want to remember), but I don’t think so?

37 Kosh's Shadow  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:09:40pm

re: #36 Dianna

Colossus fell in love with another computer? I saw that in junior high (much, much longer ago than I really want to remember), but I don’t think so?

Sort of.
SPOILER WARNING
Although I probably don’t have it right because I last saw it years ago at a NESFA meeting.
Colossus and the Russian computer connect and decide to take over the world.

38 zombie  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:13:40pm

re: #36 Dianna

Colossus fell in love with another computer? I saw that in junior high (much, much longer ago than I really want to remember), but I don’t think so?


Colossus: The Forbin Project

Dr. Charles A. Forbin (Eric Braeden) is the chief designer of a secret government project. He and his team have built a gigantic and fantastically advanced supercomputer, called “Colossus”, to control all of the United States and Allied nuclear weapons systems. Colossus is built to be impervious to any attack, encased within a mountain and powered by its own nuclear reactor. When it is activated, the Kennedyesque President of the United States (Gordon Pinsent) announces its existence, proudly proclaiming it a perfect defense system that will ensure peace.
Almost immediately after the broadcast ends, Colossus displays a cryptic warning: “There is another system”.
It is revealed that Colossus is referring to a Soviet project very similar to Colossus; a supercomputer called “Guardian”, that controls Soviet nuclear weapons. Both computers order a link to allow them to communicate with one another. A link is set up, and the computers start exchanging messages of simple mathematics, as the scientists and officials of both sides monitor the communication on video screens. The communications become increasingly complex, eventually extending into mathematics formerly unknown to mankind. Then the two machines begin communicating in a binary language that the scientists can’t interpret. This alarms the President and the leader of the Soviet Union, who agree to disconnect the link. Colossus and Guardian demand that the link be restored, or “action will be taken.” When this threat is ignored, Colossus and Guardian each launch one of their nuclear missiles. The U.S. and U.S.S.R. quickly restore the link, and Colossus intercepts the Soviet missile before it strikes. The link is restored too late for the American missile to be destroyed, and a Soviet oil complex and neighboring town are destroyed. The scientists and officials then watch helplessly as the two computers exchange information without limitation. The computers soon announce they’ve joined, and become a single, even more powerful computer, taking the name Unity.

I think the implication was that Colossus and Guardian “fell in love” and had the equivalent of computer sex by merging.

39 Dianna  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:16:37pm

Thank you, fellows. I remember Colossus as taking over the world, not the rest of it.

40 DaveinMD  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:24:44pm

Wow, I bet there aren’t three other people in the world who watched that movie! All of us are here…

41 Kosh's Shadow  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 3:28:48pm

re: #40 DaveinMD

Wow, I bet there aren’t three other people in the world who watched that movie! All of us are here…

There were more than three in the NESFA meeting where I saw it. (New England Science Fiction Association)
And there was someone in the hotel for a computer service training course, a Gould tech, if I remember (No, not Go’auld; one of the computer companies back in the 1970’s) who helped us find a working power outlet to plug in the 16mm projector.

42 badger1970  Tue, Aug 11, 2009 4:18:06pm

re: #3 livefreeor die

Project “2501”.


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