Just when you think the Evil Christmas Tree Scandal might be subsiding (along with Bowgates One and Two, Queen-touching-gate, Children-Indoctrination-gate, Shopping-trip-gate, Plagiarized-painting-gate, and all the other goofy wingnut-gates), Christopher Knight uncovers another diabolical scheme from the Usurper in Chief and his diabolical wife: The Great Christmas Ornament Scandal, Part 2.

To recap, last week a right-wing blog published a grainy photo of a Christmas ornament on the Obamas’ enormous tree. The image of Warhol’s “Mao” purported to add further evidence to insistent claims that the president is actually the Manchurian candidate — a callous secret socialist bent on destroying American democracy from within.

Then, on Christmas Day, another blog made a startling discovery that may turn that sinister notion on its head.

A second ornament, right next to First Lady Michelle Obama’s well-toned right arm in an official White House photograph, appears to show the smiling face of former President Ronald Reagan, complete with the Stars and Stripes billowing behind him. Little Green Footballs, where an eagle-eyed blogger made the extraordinary find, firmly implanted tongue in cheek and ventured a guess: “Maybe it’s Stalin disguised as Reagan?”

The truth, however, might be even more ominous.

The year in which the Reagan image was made cannot be easily determined from the photo. But perhaps it depicts the president during the Iran-Contra era, when America surreptitiously sold weapons to Iran to illegally fund anti-communist rebels in Nicaragua. If so, the Mao ornament needs to be rethought. The photographic proximity of the Reagan ball to White House muscle might signal some as yet unrevealed shenanigans on the part of the newest Nobel Peace Prize winner. Talk about a diabolically clever strategy of plausible deniability.

But wait, it gets even worse.

No one has yet speculated on perhaps the most damning Christmas ornament of all, which Culture Monster is the first to identify. Also hanging on the tree — right next to a red one blatantly covered in stars — is a decoupage ball featuring the Hollywood sign with Liza Minnelli, Michael Jackson and James Dean. Just wait until the Family Research Council finds out: All three are well-known homosexual icons, a fact that raises serious concerns about the Obama-era fate of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell and the Defense of Marriage Act.

The … horror.