Monckton Alerts World to NASA Conspiracy, Cures Common Cold

Weird • Views: 2,364

Lord High Climate Denier Christopher Monckton, fresh from his latest appearance on the radio show of 9/11 Truther Alex Jones (during which he compared President Obama to Adolf Hitler), told an Australian audience yesterday that NASA deliberately planned the crash of a satellite during launch last year, because it would have revealed that global warming is a hoax. That’s how evil NASA is.

A NASA satellite that would have measured atmospheric carbon dioxide with unprecedented accuracy fell into the Indian Ocean in February last year.

NASA said the crash was ”extremely disappointing”. Viscount Christopher Monckton of Brenchley, dubbed the ”high priest of climate sceptics”, doubts the space agency meant it.

”Not greatly to my surprise - indeed I predicted it - the satellite crashed on take-off because the last thing they want is real world hard data,” he told a climate sceptics’ lunch in South Yarra yesterday.

NASA understood that getting the satellite into orbit would have demonstrated ”the whole darn thing” - climate-change science - ”is nonsense”.

When he isn’t saving the world from evil tricksy scientismists and their nefarious hoaxes, Monckton retires to his laboratory and produces cures for diseases such as AIDS, multiple sclerosis, and the common cold.

Yep, that’s what he says. Would Monckton lie?

His interests stretch beyond climate change. He makes the extraordinary claim, one that he admits sounds ”bonkers”, that he has also manufactured a cure to a long-term illness that attacked his endocrine system and patented the cure in conjunction with a British surgeon.

Though stressing it was in its early stages, he said the drug had had positive results treating HIV and multiple sclerosis. ”It also has been used to cure cases of colds, flu,” he said.

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