Onion: 'Iron Man 2' Buzz Heats Up Over Paltrow Rumor

Is it sexist of me to be more disturbed by jokes about violence towards women, even when they're as ludicrous as the Onion? I still find it funny, but it kind of makes me wince at the same time.

wrenchwench Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:00:06pm

Wait -- nothing about triathlons? I don't get the "Ironman" reference.

carefulnow Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:00:10pm

Sick. Not really funny. Just sick.

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:00:38pm

re: #7 carefulnow

What about the Gigli one?

carefulnow Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:01:18pm

Uh, do I hafta watch it?

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:01:55pm

Republicans hit bottom....

Democrats' Satisfaction Spikes, Republicans' Remains Scarce

The finding of little change in Republicans' satisfaction over the last month may reflect the fact that there is little room for further deterioration in Republicans' already very low satisfaction levels.

What next?

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:02:14pm

re: #9 carefulnow

It's an article. I'm interested in whether you have a less visceral reaction to a similar thing in textual form rather than in video form.

carefulnow Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:03:35pm

Okay, I scanned it. Somehow the Onion one is worse because of the multiple assaults on the senses. Onion > Gigli one, imho.

carefulnow Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:04:23pm

re: #11 Obdicut

See, I can stopped reading, but with a video you still hear it even if you're not watching.

carefulnow Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:04:41pm

stop

sigh

freetoken Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:04:44pm

INHOFE-BARRASSO-VITTER INTRODUCE THE NEPA CERTAINTY ACT

Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.), Ranking Member of the Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works, along with Sen. John Barrasso (R-Wyo.), Ranking Member on the Senate Subcommittee on Oversight and Investigations, and Sen. David Vitter (R-La.), Ranking Member of the Subcommittee on Clean Air and Nuclear Safety, introduced today S. 3230, the NEPA Certainty Act [...]

Senator Vitter: "As it stands, NEPA is subject to frequent abuse by radical environmentalists who want to use litigation to impose their agenda on federal agencies. Our bill seeks to prevent that abuse, which often hinders economic development by interfering with basic functions such as the permitting of new power plants."

Gee, who would ever have though that power plants have any impact on global warming in the first place? Why, we all know coal goes in one end of the power plants and only peace and prosperity comes out the other!

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:05:11pm

re: #12 carefulnow

The Gigli one is also the Onion. It's an article rather than TV, that's the difference.

I think that hearing the mismatch between tone and violence is kind of disturbing to people.

I still find it a very good satire on American fixation with celebrities-- and the celebrity behavior, as well.

freetoken Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:05:49pm

re: #10 Killgore Trout

See my spin-off about Utah Tea Partiers claiming they have successfully taken over their state's GOP.

Tea Partier == Unhappy camper?

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:06:39pm

Apologies for the early OT (does it count on an Onion thread?):

Third high-ranking al-Qaeda in Iraq leader killed

BAGHDAD (AP) — Iraqi and U.S. troops killed a regional leader of al-Qaeda in Iraq in an early morning raid Tuesday, as security forces continue to put pressure on the terrorist organization following the reported deaths of its two top-ranking figures over the weekend, officials said.

Abu Omar al-Baghdadi and Abu Ayyub al-Masri were killed in a joint operation Sunday in what Vice President Joe Biden called a "potentially devastating blow" to al-Qaeda in Iraq.

The intelligence that led to the elusive leaders' desert safehouse about six miles southwest of Tikrit came from the same source — a senior al-Qaeda operative captured last month — that produced the information leading to Tuesday's raid, according to a senior Iraqi military intelligence officer who supervised both operations.

Brother Holy Cruise Missile of Mild Acceptance Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:07:44pm

re: #18 Slumbering Behemoth

so that makes 3 in the past few days?

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:09:29pm

re: #19 Dreggas

Correct. Three since sunday.

reine.de.tout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:09:33pm

They pay so much attention to detail!

On that fake site, one of the comments misspelled "they're" as "their".
LOL.

reine.de.tout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:11:21pm

re: #4 Racer X

And as with every Onion video you must watch this twice. The first time with sound on. The second time with sound off just reading the bottom scroll.

Hilarious!

"Embarrassed NASA finds dead astronaut on the moon."

LOL.
What kind of sick mind thinks these things up?

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:12:44pm

re: #17 freetoken

"Our feeling is that the majority of the Republican Party delegates are now tea party people," Brian Halladay, one of the founders of the grass-roots Utah Rising organization, tells Newsmax.

Utah GOP leaders say they can't be sure, but concede the activists' assessment may be accurate.

"I'm sure they have a very strong bloc, and they may have control," Dave Hansen, chairman of the Utah GOP, tells Newsmax. "But we won't know that until we get to the convention."

Ugh. I suspect that's true in a lot of states. Candidates without Tea Party support are going to have a very hard time.

The Shadow Do Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:14:01pm

re: #15 freetoken

INHOFE-BARRASSO-VITTER INTRODUCE THE NEPA CERTAINTY ACT

Gee, who would ever have though that power plants have any impact on global warming in the first place? Why, we all know coal goes in one end of the power plants and only peace and prosperity comes out the other!

Two new coal burners approved recently, 80 & 90% CO2 sequestration respectively. It is a currently viable resource in spite of the fact that it is black in color. And it is plentiful.

I'm pretty sure that if a fossil fuel burning plant put up a windmill on site, for show, that people would buy in. There is a definite prejudice in the sourcing of energy, and this is not meant as a joke.

Stupid.

CuriousLurker Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:14:35pm

Okay, time to go for now.

You lizards be good; and if you can't be good, at least be careful!

Cato the Elder Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:14:37pm

LOL!

"Dust-covered Warren Christopher found in White House attic."

Nobody beats The Onion.

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:15:40pm

re: #24 The Shadow Do

I'm sorry, but do you have anything to back up those sequestration figures?

Brother Holy Cruise Missile of Mild Acceptance Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:15:40pm

I still like the Onion's stories on 9/11 and Atta going to hell and not getting the 72 virgins.

freetoken Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:16:05pm

Over on the nominally "Christian" Townhall, the Townhall Patriots are ♥'ing Paleo Pat's latest declaration:

pb
Location: WA
Reply # 73
Date: Apr 20, 2010 - 1:45 AM EST
What goes around comes around.
So now the left has to figure out how to control what they created. My money is on the 'whites': smarter, wealthier, guilt-free & better armed. Their only drawbacks are a strong regard for fairness, forgiveness, and love of the underdog. They lack ruthlessness.

Pistol
Location: FL
Reply # 71
Date: Apr 20, 2010 - 1:55 AM EST
Black America seems united
You make a chilling statement, Buchanan. I only hope the key word there is "seems". When the black community talks about being a traitor to the race, when they vote 96 per cent on color lines, they present the face of an "us" and "them" mentality. This has got to increase the same sort of feelings in white people. Is a white man who hires a black woman a traitor to his race? To his sex? What is happening here to recognition and reward of merit? Is this what black people want? Separate communities, loyal only internally? Right now they would seem to be getting away with a certain amount of One-way thinking. Black Miss America, Yes. White Miss America, HeII no. Black congressional Caucus Yes, White CC, no and so forth. And just where does the brotherhood of Man fit in here?
As Buchanan and Scott note, the election of Barry has had a watershed effect on white guilt. Racist charges have only increased, after the election of a black man, with 80 per cent of his votes coming from white people. A lot of folks are re-thinking the whole business of the race card. Its become a uniter for whites. Yes, I'm white they say. If that's a fair reason for your prejudice, my prejudice becomes ok. A nasty slippery path is widening. Thank you, Barry the uniter, initiator of the post-racial era.

PhillupSpace
Location: CA
Reply # 65
Date: Apr 20, 2010 - 5:04 AM EST
You can't say that, Pat
America is the land where truth is forbidden.
Didn't you hear Jack Nicholsen in "A Few Good Men" speak the truth? "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH'! Indeed, it is punishable!
Just start here: Does voting 24 to one for anyone suggest a high level of thinking? Go to any University where the smartest people in the world teach and are taught. Just get those academics to agree 24 to one on any sybject under the sun and report back to your readers!
PARDON ME IF I DON'T FAST UNTIL YOU HAVE SUCCEDDED! No, this truth is one of the many facts you are forbidden to recount!

Yes, Black America is light years away from the
world Obama grew up in but one who's ties by blood cannot be unfelt. His every action is to enrich those people at the expense of everyone else; benefits for which they will never pay more than a fraction of the burden, excuses for all their shortcommings, absolution for all their sins (metiphoricly speaking)I'm OK, You are OK, to the max, and praise for miniscule accomplishments. And they return the blind absolution, supporting him, come what may as if he were Adam Clayton Powell or Alsee Hastings taking bribes or another Black congressman with only $90 Thousand in his freezer (darn, I wondered where I left that!), all a mistake I am sure and serving his time for what will certainly turn out to be a trumped up charge (that's their story and they are sticking to it)>
[...]

Even a brave Irishman like you had better not be too truthful, Pat!

And so on and so forth. What a cesspool. Yet Buchanan is smart enough to know how to make money - he will go with his crowd, feeding them what they want and what he is so willing to give.

The Shadow Do Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:16:15pm

re: #18 Slumbering Behemoth

Apologies for the early OT (does it count on an Onion thread?):

Third high-ranking al-Qaeda in Iraq leader killed

Sure hope these Iraquis aren't using torture to secure all this intelligence...
/

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:16:45pm

re: #28 Dreggas

This one I thought was the best-- heartfelt but still darkly funny.

God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule

Cato the Elder Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:18:01pm

re: #29 freetoken

Over on the nominally "Christian" Townhall, the Townhall Patriots are ♥'ing Paleo Pat's latest declaration:

And so on and so forth. What a cesspool. Yet Buchanan is smart enough to know how to make money - he will go with his crowd, feeding them what they want and what he is so willing to give.

I still hate Carter more than Buchanan. At least Buchanan is honest.

freetoken Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:19:30pm

There's some real winners over in the comments at Townhall, on Buchanan's piece. Defense of the South, of the Confederacy, of the superiority of white people, etc.

Salem Communications - owner of Townhall, HotAir, and many other outlets... fighting for the advertising dollars (BUY GOLD!!) that Clear Channel and Murdoch normally consume.

avanti Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:19:41pm

re: #10 Killgore Trout

Republicans hit bottom...

Democrats' Satisfaction Spikes, Republicans' Remains Scarce

What next?

No wonder we are polarized with the left at 49% and maybe treading up, and the right a 10% and on the floor. Imagine the frustration of a large part of the country at 10% and thinking WTF is going on ?
Many in that 10% group wants to "take the country back" from the group that is not as unhappy with their choice. That's what elections are for, so they'll get their chance.

Renaissance_Man Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:21:19pm

The Onion does rock, but I personally have found SatireWire funnier. Especially:

Headhunting Firm Decapitates 20

and

God names Jews Chosen People Again

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:21:29pm

re: #5 Obdicut

Is it sexist of me to be more disturbed by jokes about violence towards women, even when they're as ludicrous as the Onion? I still find it funny, but it kind of makes me wince at the same time.

Just shows you were brought up right.

Renaissance_Man Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:22:49pm

re: #35 Renaissance_Man

But my absolute favourite Onion of all time is Intelligent Falling. It's so accurate it almost hurts.

The Shadow Do Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:22:50pm

re: #27 Obdicut

I'm sorry, but do you have anything to back up those sequestration figures?

Dallas Morning Snooze...

Cato the Elder Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:23:05pm

By the way, anyone who has ever gawked at Gwyneth "I Can't Get Over Myself" Paltrow's website will understand this satire better. Someone linked to it here not too long ago.

My mother named a Siamese cat after her. Monster kitteh!

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:23:44pm

re: #28 Dreggas

I still like the Onion's stories on 9/11 and Atta going to hell and not getting the 72 virgins.

"Hijackers Surprised to Find Selves In Hell"?

It wasn't their best writing, but you could tell they had to try. There was a lot of venge in those pieces.

SpaceJesus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:24:07pm

I would watch the hell out of that sex and the city sequel

kingkenrod Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:25:02pm

My favorite Onion:

Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn't Fucking Work

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:25:24pm

re: #35 Renaissance_Man

The Onion does rock, but I personally have found SatireWire funnier. Especially:

Headhunting Firm Decapitates 20

and

God names Jews Chosen People Again

Best SatireWire ever was the one where Judaism and Hinduism team up, thereby creating '900,000 people who can never make their mothers happy no matter how many times they reincarnate'.

A Man for all Seasons Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:26:01pm

re: #32 Cato the Elder

I still hate Carter more than Buchanan. At least Buchanan is honest.

Damn it! Hitler was fucking honest..It's not Honesty my friend..It's principles...
Fuck...Sometimes I feel Like I'm on a island in the middle of the Ocean..It's principles my friends...Neo Nazi's are honest and upfront with their beliefs..
We stand on a higher ground my dear lizards...This ground is all we have...

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:26:28pm

re: #42 kingkenrod

I showed that one to my mom recently. She had never heard of The Onion before. She couldn't stop laughing.

Walter L. Newton Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:28:52pm

re: #32 Cato the Elder

I still hate Carter more than Buchanan. At least Buchanan is honest.

No kidding.

Cato the Elder Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:29:08pm

re: #44 HoosierHoops

Damn it! Hitler was fucking honest..It's not Honesty my friend..It's principles...
Fuck...Sometimes I feel Like I'm on a island in the middle of the Ocean..It's principles my friends...Neo Nazi's are honest and upfront with their beliefs..
We stand on a higher ground my dear lizards...This ground is all we have...

And Carter stands in the swamp.

freetoken Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:30:19pm

From the Townhall comments on the Buchanan piece... these should make it pretty clear exactly that fear, and a particular fear, is driving the "populists" such as Tea Partiers:

Joseph
Location: IL
Reply # 40
Date: Apr 20, 2010 - 10:22 AM EST
South Africa
On average two white farmers are murdered each week ! Americans of european origin cannot allow themselves to become a minority ! The consequences to our children will be disastrous.
We must place a moratorium on immigration both illegal and legal. We bring our troops back home from europe and Japan and S. Korea. We must stop giving foreign aid to Israel and the arab countries. We must strenghten our nation by reducing the spending around the world and start spending just a p[ortion of that money here at home.

Dwayne
Location: GA
Reply # 14
Date: Apr 20, 2010 - 4:10 PM EST
ALISON:

Do you seriously believe your children or grandchildren will be better off when whites are a minority in the United States? Do you seriously believe that becoming a minority could possibly be good for us in any way?

bagua Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:30:53pm

Alert:

All new episode starts in 30 minutes.

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:31:53pm

Gun weirdo in shadow of US Capitol.

More oddballs here.

Walter L. Newton Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:33:38pm

re: #49 bagua

Alert:

All new episode starts in 30 minutes.

Hour and a half here. Waiting for the LOST TUESDAY PIZZA to finish cooking.

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:33:57pm

re: #48 freetoken

Americans of european origin cannot allow themselves to become a minority !

And that's why the recent trend with the Republicans towards an all white Christian party a historical dead end.

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:33:59pm

re: #38 The Shadow Do

Dallas Morning Snooze...

As I thought. It's a pledge to do so, not reality.

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:34:45pm

re: #50 Gus 802

I'll take "People who think they're far more intimidating than they actually are" for $1000, Alex!

Walter L. Newton Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:34:46pm

re: #50 Gus 802

Gun weirdo in shadow of US Capitol.

More oddballs here.

Holy cow... weren't they breaking the law or something?

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:35:00pm

From Second Amendment March 2010:

Banner sign reading "THE BLACK PANTHERS WERE RIGHT: GUN RIGHTS = SELF DEFENSE AGAINST GOV'T REPRESSION & FASCIST DEATH SQUADS." April 19th, 2010. Washington Monument grounds.

Decatur Deb Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:35:19pm

re: #50 Gus 802

Gun weirdo in shadow of US Capitol.

More oddballs here.

Those people need a whole lot of PT and route marches (among other things).

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:35:46pm

re: #55 Walter L. Newton

Holy cow... weren't they breaking the law or something?

Nope. And I don't give a crap if they weren't breaking the law. I'm practicing my 1st Amendment rights.

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:36:20pm

re: #48 freetoken

From the Townhall comments on the Buchanan piece... these should make it pretty clear exactly that fear, and a particular fear, is driving the "populists" such as Tea Partiers:

'Americans of European origin' are already a minority in my state, certainly in my zip code, and you know what? It may be the end of the world as these folks know it, but I feel fine.

windsagio Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:36:45pm

re: #18 Slumbering Behemoth

Think they had to waterboard him to get the info?

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:36:55pm

re: #48 freetoken

From the Townhall comments on the Buchanan piece... these should make it pretty clear exactly that fear, and a particular fear, is driving the "populists" such as Tea Partiers:

Also, what the hell are we planning to do about it? Import Swedes?

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:36:57pm

The John Birch society was there too.

More weirdos.

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:37:23pm

re: #50 Gus 802

Oathkeepers and the Birch Society were there. They all look pretty unfit for survivalists.

windsagio Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:37:45pm

re: #50 Gus 802

My first thought was "Nice Shirt"

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:38:10pm

re: #61 SanFranciscoZionist

Also, what the hell are we planning to do about it? Import Swedes?

Socialism! No!

Good god, with Europe taken over by socialism, hasn't the white race already fallen to ruin?

Walter L. Newton Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:38:12pm

re: #58 Gus 802

Nope. And I don't give a crap if they weren't breaking the law. I'm practicing my 1st Amendment rights.

What the fuck are you yelling at me for?

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:38:23pm

re: #63 Killgore Trout

Oathkeepers and the Birch Society were there. They all look pretty unfit for survivalists.

Yeah, they're all there on a work day. Bunch of tub o' lards. Probably on some government assistance program.

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:39:12pm

re: #66 Walter L. Newton

What the fuck are you yelling at me for?

Not yelling. But you knew they weren't breaking the law.

Cato the Elder Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:39:20pm

re: #50 Gus 802

Gun weirdo in shadow of US Capitol.

More oddballs here.

[waves hand]

These are not the gun weirdos you are looking for.

Seriously. These weirdos are harmless.

It's the ones in the woods we should be worried about.

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:39:32pm

re: #66 Walter L. Newton

I think they were on the Virginia side of the river.

Walter L. Newton Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:39:35pm

re: #68 Gus 802

Not yelling. But you knew they weren't breaking the law.

Really... you reading minds now...

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:39:40pm

re: #66 Walter L. Newton

What the fuck are you yelling at me for?

Just turn down the volume on your text-to-speech translator, Walter. Then the yelling will stop.

Renaissance_Man Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:39:55pm

re: #63 Killgore Trout

Oathkeepers and the Birch Society were there. They all look pretty unfit for survivalists.

Cans in your bomb shelter apparently aren't confiscation-proof enough. Only forty pounds of fat packed around your viscera is safe from the revenooers.

Walter L. Newton Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:41:28pm

re: #70 Killgore Trout

I think they were on the Virginia side of the river.

Thank you. And I wouldn't have the guns laws on either side, that's why I asked.

re: #72 Obdicut

Just turn down the volume on your text-to-speech translator, Walter. Then the yelling will stop.

Were you trying to be funny... cause that was LOL.

Obdicut Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:41:59pm

Who's this guy 'Tyrany' that we fought?

Image: 4537243043_2d90efe024.jpg

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:42:24pm

I have to admit I'm having more survivalist thoughts myself. It must be the economic crisis but I'm looking into solar panels, wind turbines, water cisterns. I buy a few extra tins of sardines every week. I hope I don;t get carried away.

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:43:02pm

re: #69 Cato the Elder

[waves hand]

These are not the gun weirdos you are looking for.

Seriously. These weirdos are harmless.

It's the ones in the woods we should be worried about.

I'm sure some of these folks venture into the woods from time to time. The protest was populated with III Percenters, Oath Keepers, Birchers and who knows what else.

A Man for all Seasons Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:44:22pm

re: #74 Walter L. Newton

Were you trying to be funny... cause that was LOL.

How is work going?

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:44:24pm

re: #51 Walter L. Newton

Hour and a half here. Waiting for the LOST TUESDAY PIZZA to finish cooking.

3 hours, 15 minutes here. No spoilers please. :)

freetoken Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:44:36pm

re: #61 SanFranciscoZionist

Also, what the hell are we planning to do about it? Import Swedes?

Hmmmm.... contemplating the thought of importing Swedes...

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:45:54pm

re: #80 freetoken

Hmmm... contemplating the thought of importing Swedes...

Now that's something worth fighting for!

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:45:56pm

re: #77 Gus 802

I'm sure some of these folks venture into the woods from time to time. The protest was populated with III Percenters, Oath Keepers, Birchers and who knows what else.

I'm considering designing a t-shirt that says:

97-Percenter
We Will Shoot Back
And There Are A Lot More Of Us

Except no one I know will even understand what the hell it means, so there's no real point in my wearing one.

freetoken Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:46:21pm

re: #76 Killgore Trout

I have to admit I'm having more survivalist thoughts myself....

BUY ... !!

SanFranciscoZionist Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:46:37pm

re: #80 freetoken

Hmmm... contemplating the thought of importing Swedes...

I'm sure most male Americans would be OK with the importation of that one, at least.

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:46:52pm

re: #82 SanFranciscoZionist

I'm considering designing a t-shirt that says:

97-Percenter
We Will Shoot Back
And There Are A Lot More Of Us

Except no one I know will even understand what the hell it means, so there's no real point in my wearing one.

Yeah. Most people would just see "We Will Shoot Back" and think you're another one of those Tea Party weirdos.

avanti Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:46:59pm

re: #76 Killgore Trout

I have to admit I'm having more survivalist thoughts myself. It must be the economic crisis but I'm looking into solar panels, wind turbines, water cisterns. I buy a few extra tins of sardines every week. I hope I don;t get carried away.

I try to keep a six pack of Sam Adams in the fridge 24/7, but need to drink it and restock to keep a fresh stash for the upcoming end of the world as we know it.

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:47:16pm

re: #60 windsagio

Think they had to waterboard him to get the info?

I don't know, and I don't really care to speculate on what the Iraqi military might do to extract information from an AQ leader in custody.

Reginald Perrin Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:47:51pm

re: #22 reine.de.tout

What kind of sick mind thinks these things up?

Probably ones like me who grew up reading National Lampoon. Their slogan was, "that's not funny, that's sick".

Walter L. Newton Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:48:24pm

re: #79 Slumbering Behemoth

3 hours, 15 minutes here. No spoilers please. :)

No... I have to substitute for the overnight cashier tonight, so I'm running out right after the episode... got to work 10 to 6:30 am.

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:48:40pm

re: #61 SanFranciscoZionist

Also, what the hell are we planning to do about it? Import Swedes?

Ban abortion, birth control, and make us white folk do more fuckin'.

Killgore Trout Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:49:33pm

re: #83 freetoken

Ha! All I can afford is sardines at the moment.

avanti Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:50:12pm

re: #82 SanFranciscoZionist

I'm considering designing a t-shirt that says:

97-Percenter
We Will Shoot Back
And There Are A Lot More Of Us

Except no one I know will even understand what the hell it means, so there's no real point in my wearing one.

How about "When the revolution comes, I'll be on the side with the Air Force, Navy, Marines and Coast Guard"

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:50:41pm

re: #89 Walter L. Newton

Sorry brother, that sucks. I could never adjust to a grave yard shift, despite trying. Well, at least it's only temporary, and you'll still get to see tonight's episode.

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:51:56pm

Ah yes. Another example of unequal application of the law in America:

Michael Douglas' son gets 5 years in drug case

New York (CNN) -- The son of actor Michael Douglas apologized to a federal judge before being sentenced to a five-year prison term Tuesday, promising to follow "the true right path" when released.

Cameron Douglas, 31, pleaded guilty to distributing large quantities of methamphetamine and cocaine in January.

Had he been a working class stuff he'd be doing hard time for the next 20 years.

Caste system.

Dark_Falcon Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:52:55pm

re: #92 avanti

How about "When the revolution comes, I'll be on the side with the Air Force, Navy, Marines and Coast Guard"

Hell, avanti, if you had your way you'd reactivate the Salem and turn her loose on any "March on Washington". That would squash anything flat.

/entirely kidding

Dark_Falcon Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:53:49pm

re: #94 Gus 802

Ah yes. Another example of unequal application of the law in America:

Michael Douglas' son gets 5 years in drug case

Had he been a working class stuff he'd be doing hard time for the next 20 years.

Caste system.

that's the way it works in LA. If you're in with the stars, you get better treatment. It's a company town in many ways.

Slumbering Behemoth Stinks Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:54:02pm

re: #75 Obdicut

Who's this guy 'Tyrany' that we fought?

Image: 4537243043_2d90efe024.jpg

She's subtly trying to indicate that her grandpappy beat up a tranny once.

Decatur Deb Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:55:00pm

re: #92 avanti

How about "When the revolution comes, I'll be on the side with the Air Force, Navy, Marines and Coast Guard"

It would have been arrogant but fun for the Prez to send a platoon of AH-64s low and slow over the militiafest.

WINDUPBIRD DISEASE [S.K.U.M.M.] Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:57:32pm

re: #96 Dark_Falcon

that's the way it works in LA. If you're in with the stars, you get better treatment. It's a company town in many ways.

Can't stand LA. I've been there a few times, it just gives me the willies.

100

WINDUPBIRD DISEASE [S.K.U.M.M.] Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:58:24pm

re: #94 Gus 802

Ah yes. Another example of unequal application of the law in America:

Michael Douglas' son gets 5 years in drug case

Had he been a working class stuff he'd be doing hard time for the next 20 years.

Caste system.

There are people in jail for 5 years for possession. Crazy.

101

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 5:59:52pm

re: #100 WindUpBird

There are people in jail for 5 years for possession. Crazy.

Or life sentences for marijuana distribution like we see in many of the backwater states. Was just reading that this little rich boy was facing an average of 10 years in the slammer.

102

Gus Tue, Apr 20, 2010 6:04:25pm

Yipee! Speaking of sentencing.

25 Years for Leader of Argentine Dictatorship

BUENOS AIRES (Reuters) — The last leader of Argentina’s dictatorship on Tuesday was sentenced to 25 years in prison for his involvement in the kidnapping, torture and murder of 56 people in a clandestine concentration camp.
The official, Reynaldo Bignone, 82, was convicted along with six other former military and police officers for ordering beatings and electrocutions of dissidents of the military regime, which governed from 1976 to 1983...

Many of the junta’s top leaders are under house arrest on charges of kidnapping babies born to mothers held in captivity during military rule.

The douche bag is appealing to serve time under house arrest though. Another one. I wonder if Henry Kissinger will pay him a visit.

103

Dark_Falcon Tue, Apr 20, 2010 6:09:31pm

re: #102 Gus 802

Yipee! Speaking of sentencing.

25 Years for Leader of Argentine Dictatorship

The douche bag is appealing to serve time under house arrest though. Another one. I wonder if Henry Kissinger will pay him a visit.

I'm not going to get into the matter of Kissinger, but I do hope that scumbag Bignone is made it spend the rest of his days in solitary confinement.

104

Cato the Elder Tue, Apr 20, 2010 6:16:22pm

re: #100 WindUpBird

There are people in jail for 5 years for possession. Crazy.

Word up.

105

Mad Prophet Ludwig Tue, Apr 20, 2010 6:22:44pm

re: #29 freetoken

From the blockheads that you quoted, this is just too precious a challenge.

Just start here: Does voting 24 to one for anyone suggest a high level of thinking? Go to any University where the smartest people in the world teach and are taught. Just get those academics to agree 24 to one on any sybject under the sun and report back to your readers! PARDON ME IF I DON'T FAST UNTIL YOU HAVE SUCCEDDED! No, this truth is one of the many facts you are forbidden to recount!

OK here is a list of the things all us smart folks at universities agree with to a greater than 99% level that these many of these rubes will disagree with.

1. AGW is real, happening now and caused by us. The consequences will be catastrophic if our course does not change.

2. Evolution happened. It is real and even happening now.

3. Southern Slavery was a terrible thing.

4. The Nazis were evil and the Holocaust was real.

5. Sarah "drill me" Palin is a moron.

6. The Establishment Clause is a good thing.

7. The Texas School Board is a disgrace.

8. (Only at 70%) Texas is a disgrace, but Austin is an island of civilization.

9. Obama, like him or not, is not a communist or a socialist. Of course, we can actually define those words.

10. Guns may not kill people the same way that people kill people, but people with guns are much better at it. Therefore, guns need to be kept out of the hands of idiots, criminals, and crazy folk.

11. "Lithium" Beck is insane.

12. Pat "goose step" Buchanan is a closet Nazi - who comes out of the closet a little more each day.

13. 10 generations of 1st cousins marrying is a bad idea. Do you hear that "Consanguinity" Monckton?

14. We like pie.

15. Fox news is one of the ost successful propaganda organizations in American history and they have perfected Goebbels' art of the big lie.

16. We like ice cream on pie also.

17. We really don't like nazis, and we find those who make apologetics for them to be nauseating and repugnant.

18. We like BSG. So say we all. OK that is only at 87%

19. We think that people who use cogent arguments full of facts and logic are to be taken more seriously than those who do not.

20. We also like cake. Ice cream on that is good too.

106

Dark_Falcon Tue, Apr 20, 2010 6:25:47pm

re: #105 LudwigVanQuixote

So, if you call people blockheads and you've got a temper, does that mean we can call you Lucy?

/Sorry, I couldn't resist.

107

webevintage Tue, Apr 20, 2010 6:29:37pm

re: #61 SanFranciscoZionist

Also, what the hell are we planning to do about it? Import Swedes?

Maybe we could get a large amount of Norwegian Bachelor Farmers to immigrate.

108

Feline Fearless Leader Tue, Apr 20, 2010 6:33:25pm

re: #59 SanFranciscoZionist

'Americans of European origin' are already a minority in my state, certainly in my zip code, and you know what? It may be the end of the world as these folks know it, but I feel fine.

And given that they fear becoming a minority doesn't that carry the implication that they know how minorities were treated in the past while they were in control?

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