Bryan Fischer, spokesman for the politically active hate group American Family Association, says “defeating Darwin” is so simple even a caveman could do it.

Then Fischer demonstrates how a caveman does it.

This hilariously stupid article has so many howlers in it, it’s hard to pick out a favorite, but this one is a stand-out: the “turtle on a fence post” argument.

When you see a turtle on a fence post, what’s the one thing you know? Somebody put him there. When you see a world hanging in space, what’s the one thing you know? Someone hung it there.

As all creationists must, Fischer proceeds to misrepresent the views of paleontologist Stephen Jay Gould:

But, sadly for Darwinians, after 150 years of digging in dirt all around the world, there are still no transitional fossils at all, not one! The most famous paleontologist in the world, Harvard’s Stephen Jay Gould, said, “The extreme rarity of transitional forms in the fossil record persists as the trade secret of paleontology.” (Note” “extreme rarity” is Harvard-speak for “nada, zilch, zippo.”)

The claim that there are “no transitional fossils” is a standard creationist lie. But no matter how many transitional forms are discovered, creationists relentlessly repeat this falsehood. (Isn’t there a Commandment about “bearing false witness?”)

Refuting a brain-dead article like this is an exercise in futility, but I’ll also point out that Fischer quotes “University of Bristol scientist Alan Linton:”

And this from University of Bristol scientist Alan Linton: “Throughout 150 years of the science of bacteriology, there is no evidence that one species of bacteria has changed into another. None exists in the literature claiming that one species has been shown to evolve into another.” (Note: “none” means “none, nada, zilch, zippo.”)

Oddly enough, Fischer doesn’t mention that although Alan Linton may be a scientist, he also happens to be affiliated with the UK’s Biblical Creation Society. Just an oversight, I’m sure.