God Tells Mike Huckabee to Warm Up in the Bullpen

Fox News host receiving conflicting messages from on high

WingnutsSeptember 2011 • Views: 24,255

God keeps changing His mind about far right theocrat Mike Huckabee’s presidential plans; apparently He’s now telling Huckabee to suit up again and get back in the game: Huckabee looks again at Republican presidential bid.

A sign of disarray on the evangelical right wing. Apparently there aren’t enough religious fanatics in this GOP field already.

By the way, this is what Huckabee looks and sounds like when he drops the “aw shucks” cornpone routine: Video: Mike Huckabee Speaks to Radical Anti-Abortion ‘Personhood’ Group.

UPDATE at 9/30/11 1:04:49 pm

But … HuckPAC shoots down report of Huckabee weighing a 2012 run.

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77 comments

Amory Blaine Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:49:04pm

Wish the flying spaghetti monster would throw his hat in the ring.

engineer cat Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:52:56pm

at the point that sarah palin, chris christie, and mike huckabee get in the race the gop's flop sweat will become really obvious

Kragar Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:53:57pm

Bachmann and Perry must be speed dialing Jesus like crazy right now.

Killgore Trout Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:54:22pm

HuckPAC shoots down report of Huckabee weighing a 2012 run

A report that former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee (R) was thinking about getting in the 2012 presidential race startled the political world Friday, but was immediately shot down by those close to Huckabee.

A top official with HuckPAC told The Hill that the rumors had no truth.

"The governor is still content with his decision to stay out of the race," the official said.

albusteve Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:54:35pm

Mike has had some aw shucks face time now...he's ready...
lightning in a moonshine jug

Lidane Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:55:19pm

re: #2 engineer dog

Lucky for Chris Christie, there's video of him calling the creeping Sharia meme total crap and venting at the crazies in the GOP. He should be able to skip 2012 altogether.

Caribou Barbie is waaay past her shelf life and Huckabee would be just another batshit religious nutjob.

CuriousLurker Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:56:36pm

Drive-by post: I have to wonder if this is an attempt to counteract the Christie rumors with someone more palatable to the evangelical base...

Kragar Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:56:48pm

I wonder how his copyright infringement deal is going?

Charles Johnson Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:57:05pm

re: #4 Killgore Trout

HuckPAC shoots down report of Huckabee weighing a 2012 run

Heh. Nothing these people say can be believed. They'll lie about his plans right up to the last minute.

Lidane Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:57:12pm

You know, for a deity that is supposedly omniscient and omnipotent, God is amazingly indecisive.

(I Stand By What I Said Whatever It Was) Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:57:41pm

The GOP spent so much time demonizing Obama, they did nothing to build up their own candidates. Now that they realize that all their demonizing may amount to nothing because all of their candidates suck, they are running around like headless chicken.

And then they have the nerve to identify their own incompetence and inconsistency with God's will. Fantastic!

jamesfirecat Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:58:25pm

re: #10 Lidane

You know, for a deity that is supposedly omniscient and omnipotent, God is amazingly indecisive.

Did you miss the part where he got different religions to consider the same place "their promise land"?

(I Stand By What I Said Whatever It Was) Fri, Sep 30, 2011 12:58:33pm

re: #10 Lidane

You know, for a deity that is supposedly omniscient and omnipotent, God is amazingly indecisive.

Erratic like a headless chicken, one might think…

reine.de.tout Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:01:59pm

re: #11 000G

The GOP spent so much time demonizing Obama, they did nothing to build up their own candidates. Now that they realize that all their demonizing may amount to nothing because all of their candidates suck, they are running around like headless chicken.
. . .

Damn, will wonders never cease. I agree with you 100% on that.

Lidane Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:05:04pm

re: #11 000G

The GOP spent so much time demonizing Obama, they did nothing to build up their own candidates. Now that they realize that all their demonizing may amount to nothing because all of their candidates suck, they are running around like headless chicken.

AKA, the Democratic strategy in 2004 and in the 1980's.

Wonder if the GOP will learn from the mistakes the Dems made. Probably not.

engineer cat Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:06:46pm

God Tells Mike Huckabee to Warm Up in the Bullpen

warm bull

my favorite

Ming Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:08:46pm

I know Huckabee's candidacy seems unlikely right this minute, but unfortunately, his potential appeal to "the right-wing base" is strong. Look how eagerly they embraced Rick Perry, before Perry's awful debate performances. In Perry, the base was ecstatic to find a theocrat who (they thought) could beat Obama. The base remains uncomfortable with Mitt Romney.

After the revelation that she had sex with an African American, Sarah Palin is probably significantly tarnished in the eyes of the Tea Party. Rick Perry and Michele Bachmann have both had a few gaffes recently, and the Tea Party may be pretty close to giving up on them as well. At the moment, if Huckabee decides to run, the Tea Party may view him as a savior.

Feline Fearless Leader Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:09:15pm

re: #12 jamesfirecat

Did you miss the part where he got different religions to consider the same place "their promise land"?

Amazingly similar to a child getting the red ants and the black ants into the same area so that they will fight for his amusement, isn't it?

SanFranciscoZionist Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:10:43pm

re: #17 Ming

I know Huckabee's candidacy seems unlikely right this minute, but unfortunately, his potential appeal to "the right-wing base" is strong. Look how eagerly they embraced Rick Perry, before Perry's awful debate performances. In Perry, the base was ecstatic to find a theocrat who (they thought) could beat Obama. The base remains uncomfortable with Mitt Romney.

After the revelation that she had sex with an African American, Sarah Palin is probably significantly tarnished in the eyes of the Tea Party. Rick Perry and Michele Bachmann have both had a few gaffes recently, and the Tea Party may be pretty close to giving up on them as well. At the moment, if Huckabee decides to run, the Tea Party may view him as a savior.

Any evidence that the Tea Party cares about the color of the guy Sarah slept with over twenty years ago? I think they will love her forever.

(I Stand By What I Said Whatever It Was) Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:11:23pm

re: #15 Lidane

AKA, the Democratic strategy in 2004 and in the 1980's.

Wonder if the GOP will learn from the mistakes the Dems made. Probably not.

You think that this is why they are already amping up the "Democrats are planning to steal the 2012 elections" meme?

(I Stand By What I Said Whatever It Was) Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:12:47pm

re: #14 reine.de.tout

Damn, will wonders never cease. I agree with you 100% on that.

Heh. Did you watch Stewart's bit on Saudi Arabia the other night?

OhCrapIHaveACrushOnSarahPalin Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:15:16pm

re: #17 Ming

After the revelation that she had sex with an African American, Sarah Palin is probably significantly tarnished in the eyes of the Tea Party.

lmao

Just like Ginny Thomas is, right?

I doubt even the leftiest lefty on the left believes anything in that McGinniss book.

Lidane Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:17:39pm

re: #17 Ming

The fact that it would take having sex with a black man to somehow taint Caribou Barbie in their eyes says volumes about the Tea Party.

Everyone else just had to listen to her talk to figure out she wasn't a serious political figure.

SanFranciscoZionist Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:19:10pm

re: #23 Lidane

The fact that it would take having sex with a black man to somehow taint Caribou Barbie in their eyes says volumes about the Tea Party.

Everyone else just had to listen to her talk to figure out she wasn't a serious political figure.

I don't think having sex with someone black rules out a person being a serious political figure.

I mean, look at Thomas Jefferson.

Lidane Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:20:37pm

re: #24 SanFranciscoZionist

I don't think having sex with someone black rules out a person being a serious political figure.

I mean, look at Thomas Jefferson.

Well, yes. But we're talking about the Tea Party here. They're not the brightest bulbs in the box. They would actually see having interracial sex as something bad.

(I Stand By What I Said Whatever It Was) Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:20:43pm

re: #24 SanFranciscoZionist

I don't think having sex with someone black rules out a person being a serious political figure.

I mean, look at Thomas Jefferson.

Apropos: [Link: chronicle.com...]

OhCrapIHaveACrushOnSarahPalin Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:23:48pm

re: #25 Lidane

Well, yes. But we're talking about the Tea Party here. They're not the brightest bulbs in the box. They would actually see having interracial sex as something bad.

Not so re: Ginny Thomas, who led one of those stupid tea party groups. Blabberty Central.

Plus, who among them would believe anything out of that McGinniss book? I agree with Ming's post except that odd curve ball.

SpaceJesus Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:25:18pm

god damn it wth

[Link: www.npr.org...]

zora Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:25:35pm

I think Huckabee will support Romney. His daughter works for Romney's campaign and he realizes that Perry is unelectable.

makeitstop Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:29:26pm

re: #28 SpaceJesus

god damn it wth

[Link: www.npr.org...]

Shouldn't that read 'Dad damn it?' :)

Varek Raith Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:31:17pm

re: #28 SpaceJesus

god damn it wth

[Link: www.npr.org...]

A Tea Party with Uncle Sam and Friends

SpaceJesus Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:33:48pm

it's like you took the mr. rodgers show, then combined it with peewee herman and josef goebbels

Kragar Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:33:51pm

re: #28 SpaceJesus

god damn it wth

[Link: www.npr.org...]

WTF is that shit?

lostlakehiker Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:34:55pm

re: #17 Ming

I know Huckabee's candidacy seems unlikely right this minute, but unfortunately, his potential appeal to "the right-wing base" is strong. Look how eagerly they embraced Rick Perry, before Perry's awful debate performances. In Perry, the base was ecstatic to find a theocrat who (they thought) could beat Obama. The base remains uncomfortable with Mitt Romney.

After the revelation that she had sex with an African American, Sarah Palin is probably significantly tarnished in the eyes of the Tea Party. Rick Perry and Michele Bachmann have both had a few gaffes recently, and the Tea Party may be pretty close to giving up on them as well. At the moment, if Huckabee decides to run, the Tea Party may view him as a savior.

Tea Party will not flock to Huckabee. He pardoned some people based on his belief that No~~TrueScottsman^T~~Christian would ever do anything so cruel as murder. They may have been lying---it wouldn't be the first insincere conversion. They may have been telling the truth, but changed their minds the next time they wanted money or got angry. Either way, a record of letting people out of jail because you're a sucker for a sob story, and because you just can't think ill of someone who (for the time being, and oh so conveniently) professes Christianity, will not sit well with the Tea Party.

Bob Shrum has an article in which he argues that in the end, Romney will be the nominee for the same reason that Nixon got the nomination back when---faut de mieux.

Romney is the safe candidate. You can pretty much expect that he'll stay focused, that he'll be able to raise money, that he won't blow a fuse and melt down during a debate, that he won't say something so monumentally and obviously stupid that it sinks his campaign just like that.

The way things are going, that sort of a candidate looks like a winner in the general election, and according to Shrum, in the end, Tea Party or not, the Republicans will nominate somebody they think stands a chance in the general election. This leaves out the Newt Gingriches, the Ron Pauls, and so on.

As to Palin's chances being shot, Republicans aren't anywhere near as exercised about interracial marriage as you seem to think. Who's their hero on the SC? Justice Thomas, married to a white woman. And if I needed more examples, they wouldn't be that hard to find. Bill O'Reilly, married to an Asian. Phil Gramm, married to an Asian. Palin's chances are shot but it has much more to do with the fact that she can't make a clean kill of a moose than it does to do with her youthful love life. And more yet to do with the fact that she can't say anything coherent about national political issues.

OhCrapIHaveACrushOnSarahPalin Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:40:07pm

re: #34 lostlakehiker

As to Palin's chances being shot, Republicans aren't anywhere near as exercised about interracial marriage as you seem to think. Who's their hero on the SC? Justice Thomas, married to a white woman. And if I needed more examples, they wouldn't be that hard to find. Bill O'Reilly, married to an Asian. Phil Gramm, married to an Asian.

e_e

The shortlist...well, only list, of grand marshals for the Conservative Diversity Parade.

Jack Burton Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:40:30pm

re: #33 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)

WTF is that shit?

1000 year leap for kids.

The religious have been brainwashing children for millennia. Why stop now?

SpaceJesus Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:40:56pm

anybody here know anything about living on saipan? i have a job offer there.

dragonfire1981 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:40:56pm

Seems like the same thing as the Chris Christie speculation. How many GOP candidates do we need anyway?

Obdicut Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:41:09pm

re: #34 lostlakehiker

Heh. Romney can say as many incredibly stupid things as he wants, as long as they fall in line with GOP orthodoxy.

Such as his backtrack on AGW.

[Link: www.ibtimes.com...]

Obdicut Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:42:28pm

re: #37 SpaceJesus

Edited due to fuckupery.

garhighway Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:42:43pm

re: #34 lostlakehiker

As to Palin's chances being shot, Republicans aren't anywhere near as exercised about interracial marriage as you seem to think. Who's their hero on the SC? Justice Thomas, married to a white woman. And if I needed more examples, they wouldn't be that hard to find. Bill O'Reilly, married to an Asian. Phil Gramm, married to an Asian. Palin's chances are shot but it has much more to do with the fact that she can't make a clean kill of a moose than it does to do with her youthful love life. And more yet to do with the fact that she can't say anything coherent about national political issues.

Agree. They love Sarah, and she's been around long enough that the smell of crazy has faded a little. It's like new car smell that way.

If she got in, she'd be right there for the nomination. It would be her, Perry and Romney. (Perry has legs because he can raise money.)

Obdicut Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:42:58pm

re: #40 Obdicut

Oh wait, he's the legal advisor for the Marshall Islands. Different. Sorry.

garhighway Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:43:28pm

re: #42 Obdicut

Oh wait, he's the legal advisor for the Marshall Islands. Different. Sorry.

Not THAT different. Jane, Joan, whatever.

SpaceJesus Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:44:22pm

re: #40 Obdicut

sure, the job offer is a legal one

i've heard real mixed things from people about saipan, but it all comes from the internet, and not "real" people, ya know?

SpaceJesus Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:44:58pm

re: #42 Obdicut

Oh wait, he's the legal advisor for the Marshall Islands. Different. Sorry.

i'd be clerking for a justice on the supreme court of the northern marianas

The Ghost of a Flea Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:45:31pm

God's late-breaking addendum: The actual bullpen, Mike. As in, pen full of bulls.

laZardo Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:45:53pm

re: #28 SpaceJesus

Can't be as bad as MLP.

//OH YEAH I WENT THERE

SpaceJesus Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:46:22pm

hm. crap.

Obdicut Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:51:51pm

re: #44 SpaceJesus

Sorry I couldn't help. I was all excited for a moment.

You should probably just manifest there, maybe appear to a shepherd, get the dirt on the place from him.

Holidays are Family Fun Time Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:51:55pm

God Tells Mike Huckabee to Warm Up in the Bullpen

Send Money now or G-d will . . . .

SpaceJesus Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:52:42pm

re: #49 Obdicut

guess i could just walk over there and check it out

makeitstop Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:57:14pm

re: #41 garhighway

(Perry has legs because he can raise money.)

And Palin can raise money because she has legs.

//couldn't resist.

Holidays are Family Fun Time Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:57:34pm

All three dogs are bathed, and ears are cleaned. Princess dog got the hair inside her ears cut and Bother Puppy survived his blow dry.

The bathroom is a mess and I am beat.

Holidays are Family Fun Time Fri, Sep 30, 2011 1:59:22pm

re: #18 oaktree

Amazingly similar to a child getting the red ants and the black ants into the same area so that they will fight for his amusement, isn't it?

Henry David Thoreau wrote about that --no?

Holidays are Family Fun Time Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:00:28pm

re: #32 SpaceJesus

it's like you took the mr. rodgers show, then combined it with peewee herman and josef goebbels

Don't go dissing Mr. Rogers.

Holidays are Family Fun Time Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:02:30pm

I killed the thread.

sattv4u2 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:03:49pm

re: #56 ggt

I killed the thread.

:(

No
We were waiting for follow up photos of the freshly groomed pooches and the OSHA closed bathroom!

Kragar Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:04:49pm

re: #55 ggt

Don't go dissing Mr. Rogers.

Odd celebrity duos: George Romero and Fred "Mister" Rogers

But before Romero was filming people shambling around his neighborhood in death metal makeup, he tried making a living working on commercials and short films. One of his earliest jobs was shooting a television segment for a Presbyterian minister named Fred Rogers. You probably know him only as "Mister" Rogers.

(I Stand By What I Said Whatever It Was) Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:04:59pm

re: #56 ggt

I killed the thread.

:(

Maybe it's time to talk about Will Shortz now…
Image: will_shortz_.jpg

Summer Seale Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:05:35pm

God's such a kidder.

For a guy who is supposed to be omniscient and know everything past, present, and future...

...why would he ever have to change his mind? And if he changes it, wouldn't he have known in the past that he was going to change it?

None of it makes any sense at all - even according to their own rules. But then again, when you listen to them, they don't make any sense either.

Maybe it's a clue.

Kragar Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:07:49pm

re: #60 Summer

God's such a kidder.

For a guy who is supposed to be omniscient and know everything past, present, and future...

...why would he ever have to change his mind? And if he changes it, wouldn't he have known in the past that he was going to change it?

None of it makes any sense at all - even according to their own rules. But then again, when you listen to them, they don't make any sense either.

Maybe it's a clue.

If God doesn't pass the word personally to me thru an incendiary shrubbery, I don't buy it.

sattv4u2 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:10:17pm

re: #61 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)

If God doesn't pass the word personally to me thru an incendiary shrubbery, I don't buy it.

SHRUBBERY?!?!?!?

NI ,,NI,, NI NI !!

Youtube Video

Atlas Fails Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:10:30pm

Yet another Republican who wants to take us back to the days of back alley coathanger abortions. Color me shocked.

On an unrelated note, this really pissed me off. I've been pretty critical of the Wall Street protesters, but shit like this makes me hope the FBI white collar crimes division is working overtime. Assholes.

Holidays are Family Fun Time Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:11:12pm

re: #61 Kragar (Proud to be Kafir)

If God doesn't pass the word personally to me thru an incendiary shrubbery, I don't buy it.

Even then, I'd be more inclined to look for wires, or believe some alien is responsible.

And I am a believer. I just don't go for carnival stunts.

Lord Baron Viscount Duke Earl Count Planckton Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:12:47pm

re: #62 sattv4u2

SHRUBBERY?!?!?!?

NI ,,NI,, NI NI !!

[Video]

My first thought too.

They really brainwashed us, didn't they.

sattv4u2 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:14:47pm

re: #65 Sergey Romanov

My first thought too.

They really brainwashed us, didn't they.

Them, and for me in my youth, the Marx Brothers

To this day I can still recite half the scripts from their movies

AND ,, to this day when I watch one, I still find a double entendre or a gag I missed all along!

Holidays are Family Fun Time Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:15:20pm

I have to rest, Bother Puppy wore me out.

Do you know what it is like to blow dry a very hairy 50lb puppy who doesn't want to be blow-dried and combed out? Without help?

Still he is no match for our last one like him. So, I am well-trained-just older now.

Lord Baron Viscount Duke Earl Count Planckton Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:15:48pm

re: #66 sattv4u2

Never watched a single one (except Karl's /).

Lord Baron Viscount Duke Earl Count Planckton Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:17:12pm

re: #67 ggt
LOL, I like the monikers you choose for the Monster Puppy.

sattv4u2 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:17:24pm

re: #68 Sergey Romanov

Never watched a single one (except Karl's /).

LOL

Treat yourself

Yes, they were slapstick at times, but they were much Much MUCH more than that

sattv4u2 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:19:32pm

re: #68 Sergey Romanov

re: #70 sattv4u2

LOL

Treat yourself

Yes, they were slapstick at times, but they were much Much MUCH more than that

Youtube Video

Lord Baron Viscount Duke Earl Count Planckton Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:22:38pm

re: #71 sattv4u2

Ha, good. OK, name the three best ones, I'll try'em!

sattv4u2 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:26:53pm

re: #72 Sergey Romanov

Ha, good. OK, name the three best ones, I'll try'em!

Their three best movies?

Thats like asking loving parents of 10 children who their three favorites are

WELL ,, The Night At The Opera,, The Cocoanuts,,, Animal Crackers,,,

Lord Baron Viscount Duke Earl Count Planckton Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:27:35pm

re: #73 sattv4u2

Thanks! Favorited.

sattv4u2 Fri, Sep 30, 2011 2:28:47pm

re: #74 Sergey Romanov

Thanks! Favorited.

Add Duck Soup and Monkey Business (sorry,, told you I couldn't do three)

William of Orange Fri, Sep 30, 2011 7:19:23pm

Never thought of God as a flip-flopper.

(I Stand By What I Said Whatever It Was) Sat, Oct 1, 2011 1:17:22am

re: #76 William of Orange

Never thought of God as a flip-flopper.

Sometimes it may appear as such. Binding of Isaac kinda deals…

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