Hey, whatever puts more distance between him and me is A-okay in my book!

I had almost forgotten (Ok, I did forget till I saw it at Yahoo). The Nevada caucasians are meeting today to pick Mitt as their nominee, apparently by acclamation.
Paul hits the gun store, Gingrich plays for pet lovers: Scenes from the 2012 Nevada caucuses

No, no, no.
You see, I have a vacation home on the moon.

Well, there goes the neighborhood. I guess project LFG Lunar Base is off. Looks like the lizardoid lair under Denver International Airport is going to have to do for now.

Andy Borowitz @BorowitzReport
Awkward moment in Vegas today: Romney went to a $5 craps table and tried to make a $10,000 bet

Yes! Newt will start a new race of pillsbury dough-boy people to populate the moon. Who Hoo!

re: #6 tacuba14

Yes! Newt will start a new race of pillsbury dough-boy people to populate the moon. Who Hoo!

Glenn Beck's staked a claim?

re: #6 tacuba14

Image: yet-another-newt-is-an-alien-story.jpg

re: #8 Obdicut

Image: yet-another-newt-is-an-alien-story.jpg

WTF is Dole in the background? Must be serious to bring Dole back.

re: #9 BigPapa

I'm fairly sure that picture is v. old.

But more evidence:

Image: d672126d2bb4191fdc6a324629a299a9.jpg

re: #9 BigPapa

WTF is Dole in the background? Must be serious to bring Dole back.

And it still calls Newt "Speaker of the House." Yeah, it's pretty ancient.

re: #10 Obdicut

I'm fairly sure that picture is v. old.

But more evidence:

Image: d672126d2bb4191fdc6a324629a299a9.jpg

Wonder if he was piloting the Roswell ship.

First results coming in, Newt at 19%, behind Paul's 20% .

re: #7 Shiplord Kirel

Glenn Beck's staked a claim?

Having Glenn in the gene pool won't distort the Moon race. They would need to find additional women compatible with Callista and her moon hair though.

re: #11 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds

And it still calls Newt "Speaker of the House." Yeah, it's pretty ancient.

Oh yeah, doh.

re: #13 mracb

First results coming in, Newt at 19%, behind Paul's 20% .

I get the feeling that Newt's promise to go all the way to the convention was made in haste. I doubt he'll last past Super Tuesday.

re: #7 Shiplord Kirel

Glenn Beck's staked a claim?

I guess I'm messed up in the head because when I first read it I saw
stained a clam.

re: #17 BigPapa

I guess I'm messed up in the head because when I first read it I saw
stained a clam.

That's okay. You're among the Lizardim. It's not like any of us have any claim to be normal.

re: #18 thedopefishlives

That's okay. You're among the Lizardim. It's not like any of us have any claim to be normal.

Being normal would be very weird.

re: #18 thedopefishlives

I have it on good authority that there is at least one Lizard whos name is Abi Normal.

Evening Lizards.

re: #16 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds

I get the feeling that Newt's promise to go all the way to the convention was made in haste. I doubt he'll last past Super Tuesday.

I think it all comes down to how much money are people willing to give him to run.

re: #16 Targetpractice, Worst of Both Worlds

I get the feeling that Newt's promise to go all the way to the convention was made in haste. I doubt he'll last past Super Tuesday.

Are you sure he didn't say he would 'go all the way' at the convention?

re: #19 Obdicut

Being normal would be very weird.

My ex-girlfriend ran around for a while with a profile saying, "Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else."

re: #21 jamesfirecat

I think it all comes down to how much money are people willing to give him to run.

If he's doing worse than Paul, then his only hope at this point is that Santorum cashes out and endorses him. Otherwise, he's DOA.

re: #23 thedopefishlives

My ex-girlfriend ran around for a while with a profile saying, "Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else."

One of my favorite lines from J. P. Donleavy, said by a crazy woman, is "I'm really quite ordinary, isn't that extraordinary."

But what will the Mooninites say?

I spoze that everyone's seen that Orly Taitz got kicked to the curb again?

re: #27 SanFranciscoZionist

I spoze that everyone's seen that Orly Taitz got kicked to the curb again?

I think the depressing thing is that they will appeal this, and even though it has absolutely zero merit, it will still tie up the legal system's time.

re: #27 SanFranciscoZionist

I spoze that everyone's seen that Orly Taitz got kicked to the curb again?

Yeah. The reactions are the best part, as always. She doesn't give up either, our Energizer Orly.

re: #28 thedopefishlives

They're going to quickly run into the laws governing pernicious and time-wasting lawsuits, I think.

The judgement was very, very clear. They have nothing. They have not a shred of a case. Zero.

re: #30 Obdicut

They're going to quickly run into the laws governing pernicious and time-wasting lawsuits, I think.

The judgement was very, very clear. They have nothing. They have not a shred of a case. Zero.

I award you no points and may god have mercy on your soul!

re: #27 SanFranciscoZionist

I spoze that everyone's seen that Orly Taitz got kicked to the curb again?

Many compare it to the Dred Scott decision, only this time the black guy walks away smiling.

re: #27 SanFranciscoZionist

"By deciding this matter on the merits, the court in no way condones the conduct or legal scholarship of defendant's attorney, Mr. Jablonski," Malihi wrote. "This decision is entirely based on the law, as well as the evidence and legal arguments presented at the hearing."

And that is just how it should be. Pres. Obama attorney was right to not show up. It was a waste of the Courts time and the Tax Payers dollars to begin with.

re: #30 Obdicut

One thing I do love about the opinion is that it reiterated the legal criteria that expert testimony must be presented by an actual expert. This is a common thread in conspiracy theories, where self-styled "experts" give "expert opinions" on subjects that are way outside their field. Conspiracy theorists then take these opinions to heart, and challenge non-believers by saying that a "leading <whatever>" gave the opinion.

re: #22 Decatur Deb

Are you sure he didn't say he would 'go all the way' at the convention?

I don't think you properly understand Newtonian Mechanics. You are, of course, assuming a continuous timespace. Typical liberal pseudoscience. Left brain sort of stuff. Newt is beyond that.

Newt. He's Universal.

Hmmm. I didn't read your *at* until to late. Your joke is better than mine.

re: #30 Obdicut

They're going to quickly run into the laws governing pernicious and time-wasting lawsuits, I think.

The judgement was very, very clear. They have nothing. They have not a shred of a case. Zero.

If the birther website where the decision was originally posted is to be believed, they intend to argue at appeal that the judge in the original decision cited the Indiana decision, which they claim as "bad law."

Thing about it is that Taitz got greedy, choosing to forego the easy victory of a default judgment and demand the case be tried on it's merits, which the judge granted, after which he ruled the case had no merit when Orly couldn't prove her "expert" witnesses were such and gave a closing statement/testimony of such low grade that the judge told her to stop and submit the rest in writing.

re: #33 Bubblehead II

I don't think so. I think Jablonski should have filed something appropriately, and shown respect to the judge in that way. That being said, I agree that the lawsuit itself isn't worth anyone's time. I really do hope that they start chastising these time-wasters.

re: #37 Obdicut

I don't think so. I think Jablonski should have filed something appropriately, and shown respect to the judge in that way. That being said, I agree that the lawsuit itself isn't worth anyone's time. I really do hope that they start chastising these time-wasters.

I think it should have happened like this lady wanted it to. (Read down for insane awesomeness.)

re: #33 Bubblehead II

"By deciding this matter on the merits, the court in no way condones the conduct or legal scholarship of defendant's attorney, Mr. Jablonski," Malihi wrote. "This decision is entirely based on the law, as well as the evidence and legal arguments presented at the hearing."

And that is just how it should be. Pres. Obama attorney was right to not show up. It was a waste of the Courts time and the Tax Payers dollars to begin with.

Actually, they got lucky that Orly and Co. pressed to have the case tried on the merits. Otherwise, they would've gotten a free win because the opposition neither appeared nor submitted a brief. I understand the symbolic gesture, but it's disrespectful to just completely ignore the judge's request.

re: #39 thedopefishlives

Actually, they got lucky that Orly and Co. pressed to have the case tried on the merits. Otherwise, they would've gotten a free win because the opposition neither appeared nor submitted a brief. I understand the symbolic gesture, but it's disrespectful to just completely ignore the judge's request.

I'd normally agree, but in this case...I'm glad they didn't show. There's no point coddling this, or reducing the dignity of the presidency through this nonsense.

re: #39 thedopefishlives

The default judgement would be vacated on appeal, though. A default judgement means very little-- that's why the DOJ dropped the charges against that New Black Panthers dude even though they had a default judgement-- because it wouldn't have survived the appeal.

I agree it's disrespectful.

re: #40 SanFranciscoZionist

I'd normally agree, but in this case...I'm glad they didn't show. There's no point coddling this, or reducing the dignity of the presidency through this nonsense.

They didn't have to show up, they just had to file a proper motion to quash.

re: #37 Obdicut

Perhaps. Maybe a second year law student should have written his reply to the Court just to add additional sting to it

re: #42 Obdicut

They didn't have to show up, they just had to file a proper motion to quash.

Should've just sent a DVD of the Correspondents' Dinner.

re: #40 SanFranciscoZionist

If the President's attorney showed up for this one, he would be showing up for umpteen other ones in the future, because the birthers will never admit defeat.

re: #41 Obdicut

The default judgement would be vacated on appeal, though. A default judgement means very little-- that's why the DOJ dropped the charges against that New Black Panthers dude even though they had a default judgement-- because it wouldn't have survived the appeal.

I agree it's disrespectful.

I just get a little rankled when lawyers show such blatant disrespect. I know the default judgement wouldn't have gone anywhere, but after watching the SCO vs. World saga, it just annoys me when lawyers - who should know better - try to play monkey games in court.

re: #39 thedopefishlives

Disagree. It was a joke case to begin with. Should have never made it this far. The Judge knew that and killed it. There was no disrespect to the Court.

re: #38 SanFranciscoZionist

I think it should have happened like this lady wanted it to. (Read down for insane awesomeness.)

re: #42 Obdicut

They didn't have to show up, they just had to file a proper motion to quash.

True, but same applies. No point acting like this makes any sense.