Foster Friess Apologizes, Except He Really Didn’t

Why you no like caveman’s joke?
Wingnuts • Views: 32,091

At his “Campfire Blog” (with a logo reminiscent of the infamous farting scene in Blazing Saddles), Rick Santorum’s super-rich Dominionist backer Foster Friess is apologizing that so many Americans didn’t get his “joke” about women using aspirin for birth control (between the knees): For those who misunderstood my joke today, here’s my quest for forgiveness…

Last week my joke at the Conservative Political Action Conference generated laughter and media attention. Today on Andrea Mitchell’s show, my aspirin joke bombed as many didn’t recognize it as a joke but thought it was my prescription for today’s birth control practices. In fact, the only positive comments I got were from folks who remembered it from 50 years back. Birth control pills weren’t yet available, so everyone laughed at the silliness on how an aspirin could become a birth control pill.

After listening to the segment tonight, I can understand how I confused people with the way I worded the joke and their taking offense is very understandable. To all those who took my joke as modern day approach I deeply apologize and seek your forgiveness. My wife constantly tells me I need new material—she understood the joke but didn’t like it anyway—so I will keep that old one in the past where it belongs.

The classic right wing non-apology. He isn’t actually sorry for his misogynistic attempt at humor, he’s sorry that everyone else “misunderstood” him.

Friess also tries to spin Rick Santorum’s caveman views about contraception and women’s rights, says women love Santorum, and includes an attack on President Obama:

His 75% favorables include a lot of women who appreciate his clear stance on contraception that they favor. His strong personal convictions on the subject are well-known and he has never attempted to turn his personal preference into public policy unlike the stand President Obama has taken in forcing Catholic institutions to embrace his world view.

Santorum is a supporter of the Dark Ages religious right “Personhood” movement, which would outlaw all abortion and is so broadly defined that it would also criminalize many forms of birth control, so Friess is being less than honest. Of course.

Jump to top

Create a PageThis is the LGF Pages posting bookmarklet. To use it, drag this button to your browser's bookmark bar, and title it 'LGF Pages' (or whatever you like). Then browse to a site you want to post, select some text on the page to use for a quote, click the bookmarklet, and the Pages posting window will appear with the title, text, and any embedded video or audio files already filled in, ready to go.
Or... you can just click this button to open the Pages posting window right away.
Last updated: 2016-01-01 10:29 am PST
LGF User's Guide RSS Feeds Tweet

Help support Little Green Footballs!

Subscribe now for ad-free access!Register and sign in to a free LGF account before subscribing, and your ad-free access will be automatically enabled.

Recent PagesClick to refresh
Son Little - ‘State Trooper’ (Bruce Springsteen Cover)Son Little covers Bruce Springsteen's "State Trooper" Facebook: facebook.comTwitter: twitter.comTumblr: sonlittle.tumblr.com
Thanos
1 hour, 5 minutes ago
Views: 45 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Jacob Collier & Cory Henry - Arr. Jules Buckley - ” Billie Jean ” -Livebbc.co.uk
Thanos
1 hour, 21 minutes ago
Views: 63 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
In the Real Early Morning - Jacob Collier / Metropole Orkest @ BBC Proms Jacob Collier and the Metropole Orkest perform Jacob's own orchestral arrangement of his song 'In The Real Early Morning' from his debut album 'In My Room', under the baton of Jules Buckley; live at the Quincy Jones Prom at ...
Thanos
1 hour, 23 minutes ago
Views: 57 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
My Bubba - Big Bad Good (Live on KEXP)kexp.org presents My bubba performing "Big Bad Good" live in the KEXP studio. Recorded July 30, 2016. Host: MorganAudio Engineer: Jackson LongCameras: Jim Beckmann & Justin WilmoreEditor: Jim Beckmann kexp.orgohmybubba.com
Thanos
1 hour, 27 minutes ago
Views: 55 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Feeder - Eskimo New Album 'All Bright Electric' coming 7th October! feeder.lnk.to Limited and exclusive formats available from the official store: Pre-order now and receive 'Eskimo' and 'Universe of Life' as an instant downloads! Check out upcoming tour datesfeederweb.com FOLLOW FEEDERFacebook - ...
Thanos
1 hour, 34 minutes ago
Views: 57 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Hillary Clinton Speech on How Donald Trump’s Campaign Has Mainstreamed the ‘Alt-Right’ Hate MovementWatch live as Hillary takes the stage in Reno to discuss why Donald Trump's divisive rhetoric is so dangerous to our future.
Thanos
1 hour, 40 minutes ago
Views: 61 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
North Carolina Transgender Students Win Toilet Access Ruling A state law passed in March requires transgender people to use toilets that correspond to the sex on their birth certificates. The ruling led to boycotts of the state by some sports teams, businesses, and entertainers. The full case ...
Thanos
14 hours, 12 minutes ago
Views: 109 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Sovereign Sex Offender Involved in Tense KCK Standoff Arrested by U.S. Marshals Another Sovereign Citizen standoff, The original standoff lasted for more than six hours outside of a home near 57th Street and Parallel Parkway. U.S. Marshals and KCKPD originally attempted to arrest Gregory Andrews on warrants including a parole violation ...
Thanos
1 day, 3 hours ago
Views: 277 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 2
Tweets: 3 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Hillary Clinton Denounces the ‘Alt-Right,’ and the Alt-Right Is Thrilled Mr. Trump has publicly kept his distance from the alt-right, but his critics have accused him of offering subtle cues to invite its support. His appointment of Stephen K. Bannon, the head of Breitbart News, to be chief executive ...
Thanos
1 day, 12 hours ago
Views: 242 • Comments: 1 • Rating: 2
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Tim Kaine Blasts Donald Trump’s Immigration Policies as the ‘Actions of an Idiot’ Tim Kaine didn’t hold back when asked about claims that Donald Trump is softening his stance on immigration. “I don’t buy it,” the Democratic vice presidential nominee told “The Late Show” host Stephen Colbert on Thursday. “He’s always fighting ...
Thanos
1 day, 12 hours ago
Views: 373 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 1
Tweets: 27 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 5
Comments: 0
: 5