Not the Onion: Glenn Beck Will Redefine the 4th of July by Talking to the Man in the Moon

Not the Onion
Weird • Views: 23,458

I really think Glenn Beck may finally be losing his mind — for real this time, not just ranting crazily to bilk the rubes. His latest grandiose plan has a distinct odor of outright lunacy, with emphasis on the luna: Glenn Beck Will Save the 4th of July by Talking to the ‘Man in the Moon’ in Utah.

Jump to bottom

41 comments

1 Kragar (Antichrist )  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:02:24pm

I’ve often said that the 4th of July needs more 30 tall giant robots and fictional electric battles between Tesla and Edison.

2 Targetpractice  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:02:31pm

…I want whatever he’s smoking.

3 erik_t  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:02:38pm

I hope he conducts the interview from Clint Eastwood’s chair.

4 Glenn Beck's Grand Unifying Theory of Obdicut  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:03:28pm

If he weren’t such an evil shitbag he could be a really mediocre performance artist.

5 Kragar (Antichrist )  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:05:18pm

Beck’s original piece on this from the Blaze:

[Link: www.video.theblaze.com…]

6 Brother Holy Cruise Missile of Mild Acceptance  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:06:10pm

THERE’S GOLD IN THAT THAR MOON!!!

7 stabby  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:06:55pm

I never forget that before the anti-obamacare hysteria (a band wagon he jumped on at 100 mph) he did a show ranting about his stay in the hospital and calling for socialized medicine. Then he moved to Fox and Obamacare became proof of Nazism….

Is he a random idiot? Is he a whore? Who the fuck cares?

8 Targetpractice  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:07:11pm

Do you believe…they put a man on the Moon…?

//

9 stabby  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:07:13pm

But yeah, now he sounds cracked.

10 Feline Fearless Leader  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:09:04pm

re: #9 stabby

But yeah, now he sounds cracked.

He was possessed by The Onion.

11 Feline Fearless Leader  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:09:49pm

re: #3 erik_t

I hope he conducts the interview from Clint Eastwood’s chair.

He’ll use the frequency that was finally acquired from Kenneth.
/

12 lawhawk  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:10:09pm

Man in the moon?

The lunatic is in my head
The lunatic is in my head
You raise the blade, you make the change
You re-arrange me ‘till I’m sane
You lock the door
And throw away the key
There’s someone in my head but it’s not me.

Besides, everyone knows that the moon’s made of cheese. Preferably Wensleydale.

13 Feline Fearless Leader  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:12:24pm

re: #12 lawhawk

Man in the moon?

The lunatic is in my head
The lunatic is in my head
You raise the blade, you make the change
You re-arrange me ‘till I’m sane
You lock the door
And throw away the key
There’s someone in my head but it’s not me.

Besides, everyone knows that the moon’s made of cheese. Preferably Wensleydale.

And protected from intruders by coin-operated skiing robots.
:)

14 Dr Lizardo  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:12:26pm

WTF?!

Wow. He’s gone full-bore. Loony, that is.

I really don’t know what to say to this. It’s complete madness.

15 stabby  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:14:52pm

My prediction is that his fans won’t be fazed in the slightest.

16 Lidane  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:19:00pm

Obligatory:

17 Kragar (Antichrist )  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:19:11pm

Evangelicals upset that they’re being accused of calling gays pedophiles after calling gay pedophiles

As soon as the story broke that the Boy Scouts of America was considering a change in its national ban on gay members, Religious Right leaders immediately claimed that such a move would lead to an increase in child abuse in the Scouts.

But in a desperate attempt to play the victim, the very same conservative activists are now upset that they are facing criticism over their attempts to connect homosexuality with pedophilia.

The American Family Association’s Sandy Rios invited Peter LaBarbera of Americans For Truth About Homosexuality onto her show today to defend her repeated attempts to link homosexuality with pedophilia, all the while claiming that she didn’t really say it, except that she did.

18 Mongo only pawn... in game of life.  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:19:32pm

Some people are on drugs and some people should be on drugs, and Glenn Beck is a drug. So what’s the name of the “Man In The Moon” anyway?

19 ReamWorks SKG  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:19:34pm

I truly believe Glenn Beck is certifiably mad. Other people on TV and Radio I think are just earning a living (Rush Limbaugh, Nancy Grace) through a character they “invented”, but I think Glenn Beck is nuts.

20 Killgore Trout  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:23:38pm

It’s not like this is going to stop the drone panic but….
The LAPD Is Not Using Drones to Hunt Fugitive Christopher Dorner

“Reports that U.S. Customs and Border Protection’s unmanned aircraft systems (UAS) are being used are incorrect. CBP UAS are not flying in support of the search,” a spokesperson from the U.S. Customs and Border Protection told Mashable via email.

The statement from the CBP comes as others had already cast doubt on the original report’s claim.

21 Kragar (Antichrist )  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:24:18pm

re: #20 Killgore Trout

It’s not like this is going to stop the drone panic but….
The LAPD Is Not Using Drones to Hunt Fugitive Christopher Dorner

Well, of course they’re going to say that…
///

22 Killgore Trout  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:24:51pm

re: #21 Kragar (Antichrist )

Well, of course they’re going to say that…
///

Cover up!

23 Glenn Beck's Grand Unifying Theory of Obdicut  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:26:22pm

There’s nobody in those helicopters you know. Drones aren’t new, they’re just smaller.

Follow the chemtrails!

24 Stoatly  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:28:02pm

re: #22 Killgore Trout

Cover up!

Duck and Cover!

25 Brother Holy Cruise Missile of Mild Acceptance  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:28:21pm

re: #21 Kragar (Antichrist )

We couldn’t get drones to BENGHAZI on time but we can be sure to send some to hunt down one man!!!!

//

26 Varek Raith  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:29:05pm

Houston, we have a problem.

27 Bulworth  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:29:47pm
Peter LaBarbera of Americans For Truth About Homosexuality

Sounds like a new grifter group invented out of thin air for, or by, LaBarbera.

28 Varek Raith  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:31:16pm
29 Dr Lizardo  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:32:51pm

re: #23 Glenn Beck’s Grand Unifying Theory of Obdicut

There’s nobody in those helicopters you know. Drones aren’t new, they’re just smaller.

Follow the chemtrails!

CHEMTRAILGHAZI!!1!

30 Targetpractice  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:34:37pm

GOP preparing to put another ignoble “first” under their belt:

Inhofe Promises To ‘Postpone’ Hagel Confirmation Vote

Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-OK) told the National Review Online that he and other Republicans plans to “postpone” the confirmation of Chuck Hagel, President Obama’s nominee for secretary of defense.

“I’ll do that for as long as it takes,” Inhofe said. “I’m going to make sure there is a 60-vote margin.”

“Hagel may be passed out of the committee, but it’s going to be a long, long time before he hits the floor,” Inhofe said. “We’re going to need as much time as possible, and there are going to be several of us who will have holds.”

Senate Armed Services Committee Chairman Carl Levin (D-MI) scheduled a vote to pass Hagel’s confirmation out of committee for Tuesday.

31 Varek Raith  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:35:17pm

Because we don’t need a Secretary of Defense.
Nope!

32 Bulworth  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:35:42pm

re: #30 Targetpractice

Just remember, America’s national security is the most important thing in the world to them. //

33 First As Tragedy, Then As Farce  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:36:00pm

re: #30 Targetpractice

If that doesn’t improve congressional approval ratings, nothing will.

34 Lidane  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:36:24pm

re: #30 Targetpractice

GOP preparing to put another ignoble “first” under their belt:

Inhofe Promises To ‘Postpone’ Hagel Confirmation Vote

Someone remind me again how the GOP are the party of the mature adults and the Dems are the whiny, crying children.

35 Feline Fearless Leader  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:37:00pm

re: #34 Lidane

Someone remind me again how the GOP are the party of the mature adults and the Dems are the whiny, crying children.

Because the GOP says so! So shut up.
////

36 Dr Lizardo  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:37:25pm

re: #33 Our Precious Bodily Fluids

If that doesn’t improve congressional approval ratings, nothing will.

Let them continue to flounder and show themselves as the completely brainless incompetent jackasses that they are.

37 Targetpractice  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:41:14pm

This would be historic, as no Congress has ever seen the filibuster of a cabinet nominee. Yet the GOP is going forward with it for no other reason than because there’s a black guy in office. Every effort they’ve made to kill this nomination has failed, so now they’re taking the step of making fools of themselves before the nation.

I’d say I was surprised, but that would be a lie.

38 Gus  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:41:14pm

re: #22 Killgore Trout

Cover up!

Chem-trails! Fluoride! HAARP! Drones!

39 Kragar (Antichrist )  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:42:56pm
40 BongCrodny  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:46:08pm

I swear to god, if Glenn Beck started talking how the sun revolves around the earth, we’d see the Internet Idiot Brigade going “Well, how do we really know the earth revolves around the sun?”

41 Stoatly  Mon, Feb 11, 2013 12:49:17pm

re: #39 Kragar (Antichrist )

Poper Scooper?


This article has been archived.
Comments are closed.

Jump to top

Create a PageThis is the LGF Pages posting bookmarklet. To use it, drag this button to your browser's bookmark bar, and title it 'LGF Pages' (or whatever you like). Then browse to a site you want to post, select some text on the page to use for a quote, click the bookmarklet, and the Pages posting window will appear with the title, text, and any embedded video or audio files already filled in, ready to go.
Or... you can just click this button to open the Pages posting window right away.
Last updated: 2016-01-01 10:29 am PST
LGF User's Guide RSS Feeds Tweet

Help support Little Green Footballs!

Subscribe now for ad-free access!Register and sign in to a free LGF account before subscribing, and your ad-free access will be automatically enabled.

Recent PagesClick to refresh
SPLC: United States Crime Rates Still at Historic Lows MONTGOMERY, Ala. – The following statement regarding the FBI’s Uniform Crime Reporting program’s annual Crime in the United States report, released September 26, 2016, is from Lisa Graybill, deputy legal director at the Southern Poverty Law Center. "The FBI’s ...
Birth Control Works
4 hours, 49 minutes ago
Views: 78 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Advice She Didn’t Ask For"Save us from fascism but don't be a bitch about it." Thanks for weighing in, but it looks like Hillary Clinton is doing just fine without the help of body language experts. Watch Full Frontal with Samantha Bee next week ...
Thanos
8 hours, 43 minutes ago
Views: 120 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 1
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Actual Scientific Polls Show Big Win for Hillary Clinton in First Debate The consensus is in: viewers overwhelmingly thought Hillary Clinton was the winner of the first presidential debate. Four polls — from CNN/ORC, Politico/Morning Consult, NBC/SurveyMonkey, and Public Policy Polling — all showed that respondents felt Clinton bested Donald Trump ...
Thanos
9 hours, 7 minutes ago
Views: 249 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 1 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Senate Update: Races for the Senate and White House Are Moving in Near Lockstep The senate races are so important this cycle, even if Hillary wins she faces an impossible task and we face 4-8 more years of pure obstructionism from the GOP if they hang on to the Senate. Democrats are still ...
Thanos
9 hours, 28 minutes ago
Views: 136 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
America’s Biggest Food Companies Support Hillary Clinton, With One Glaring Exception If you were an exec at a big corporation that mass-produces food or farm chemicals, who would you rather see prevail in November's presidential election? To get an idea of where Big Food and Ag stand on the 2016 ...
Birth Control Works
14 hours, 32 minutes ago
Views: 202 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Want to Reduce Crime in America? Try Giving Kids Better Food. In 2015, the Guardian published a list of 24 ways to reduce crime in the most violent cities in the world. Suggestions included avoiding repressive policies, moving the focus away from poverty and putting the focus more on gun ...
Birth Control Works
14 hours, 36 minutes ago
Views: 152 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Shimon Peres, the Realist Dreamer Tel Aviv — There are very few people in the world whose lives align so effortlessly with the birth and being of their homeland. Shimon Peres, who has died at age 93, left an indelible mark on Israel — ...
Birth Control Works
14 hours, 37 minutes ago
Views: 122 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 1
Comments: 0
: 1
U.S. to Bar Arbitration Clauses in Nursing Home Contracts The federal agency that controls billions of dollars in Medicaid and Medicaid funding has moved to prevent nursing homes from forcing claims of elder abuse, sexual harassment and even wrongful death into the private system of justice known as ...
Birth Control Works
1 day ago
Views: 158 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 1
Tweets: 0 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 1
Comments: 0
: 1
2017 State Business Tax Climate Index Executive Summary The Tax Foundation’s State Business Tax Climate Index enables business leaders, government policymakers, and taxpayers to gauge how their states’ tax systems compare. While there are many ways to show how much is collected in taxes by ...
Birth Control Works
1 day, 1 hour ago
Views: 182 • Comments: 2 • Rating: 1
Tweets: 2 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0
Endorsement: Hillary Clinton Is the Only Choice to Move America Ahead Since The Arizona Republic began publication in 1890, we have never endorsed a Democrat over a Republican for president. Never. This reflects a deep philosophical appreciation for conservative ideals and Republican principles. This year is different. The 2016 Republican ...
Thanos
1 day, 7 hours ago
Views: 215 • Comments: 0 • Rating: 0
Tweets: 1 • Share to Facebook
Shares: 0
Comments: 0
: 0