Rep. Steve Stockman (R-TX): ‘If Babies Had Guns They Wouldn’t Be Aborted’

Stamp out abortion by arming fetuses!
Wingnuts • Views: 27,019

Texas congressman Steve Stockman, who is a Republican, and who is also apparently a real wise guy, troll-tweeted this earlier today:

He’s kidding, of course! How could you actually arm those little fetus guys in there? Imagine how tiny the gun would have to be! (But it would be awfully cute, you have to admit.) And how could they get the necessary training, target-shooting, etc.? Not to mention the problem of finding little tiny ammunition to go with that cute little pink or blue pistol.

Come on, he isn’t serious, it’s a joke! Who says wingnuts don’t have a sense of humor?

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48 comments
1 Dr Lizardo  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:07:32pm

WTF?

Seriously?

By the beard of the Prophet, these people are well and truly insane.

2 Charles Johnson  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:07:43pm
3 The Mountain That Blogs  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:08:38pm

re: #2 Charles Johnson

I see both competitors for the coveted “Dumbest Man in Congress” award are in fine form today.

4 Randall Gross  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:09:45pm

It’s a joke that sums up the entire political ideology of today’s GOP minus the subservience to fatcats part.

5 jamesfirecat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:10:39pm

And if ponies had horns they’d be unicorns, but that does not mean Twilight Sparkle is going to show up and hoof slap some sense into these idiots.

6 Eclectic Cyborg  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:11:40pm

is there such a thing as quality conservative humor?

7 Brother Holy Cruise Missile of Mild Acceptance  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:11:45pm

re: #2 Charles Johnson

What the hell is in the water down in Texas? Is this a result of overexposure to oil?

8 jamesfirecat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:11:50pm

re: #4 Randall Gross

It’s a joke that sums up the entire political ideology of today’s GOP minus the subservience to fatcats part.

And hating on homosexuals.

9 Randall Gross  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:12:35pm

It’s one of those passive aggressive “ha ha I’m laughing but… I’m looking serious (because I am serious…”) kind of jokes…

10 jamesfirecat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:12:35pm

re: #6 Eclectic Cyborg

is there such a thing as quality conservative humor?

Yes, it is the humor generated by conservatives believing Stephen Colbert is one of them.

11 jaunte  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:12:41pm

Steve Stockman, Louie Gohmert, John Cornyn, Ted Cruz, Rick Perry…

Truly embarrassing for Texas.

12 erik_t  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:14:54pm

It’d have to be a tiny gun, because while in the womb the baby could only handle a small… kick.

YEAAAAAAAAAAAH

13 Charles Johnson  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:15:16pm

The right is trying their best to make the Gosnell story the Biggest Thing in America. It’s stunning to see the absolute unison screeching going on. I haven’t seen them this worked up about a fake outrage since Benghazi.

14 iossarian  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:15:35pm

What a dumbass. Babies and toddlers do routinely get their hands on guns - they often end up severely injuring or killing themselves as a result.

But yuck-yuck-yuck two buttons pushed with one trolling.

15 theheat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:17:12pm

And I suppose if pregnant women had guns, we’d have ourselves a gotdamn Mexican standoff. // (imagine Michael Parks saying it.)

This whole arming everybody to the teeth shit goes both ways.

16 jaunte  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:18:07pm

re: #13 Charles Johnson

“People like this [Gosnell] thrive on the edges of society precisely because of the anti-abortion right, who are slowly but surely drying up all legal and safe methods of abortion, in state after state.”

That argument involves two steps; it’s too complicated for the screechers.

17 Backwoods_Sleuth  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:18:14pm

I see a new accessory for the tiny rubber fetus dolls…

18 iossarian  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:18:22pm

re: #13 Charles Johnson

The right is trying their best to make the Gosnell story the BIggest Thing in America. It’s stunning to see the absolute unison screeching going on. I haven’t seen them this worked up about a fake outrage since Benghazi.

As usual, they have nothing substantive to say on any of the major policy issues, and they’re finding themselves forced onto the wrong side of the gay marriage debate.

So it’s scream about the shiny distracting thing time.

19 Varek Raith  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:23:18pm

re: #13 Charles Johnson

The right is trying their best to make the Gosnell story the Biggest Thing in America. It’s stunning to see the absolute unison screeching going on. I haven’t seen them this worked up about a fake outrage since Benghazi.

They got that collective thing down pat!
Wait…

20 Interesting Times  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:29:08pm

re: #18 iossarian

So it’s scream about the shiny distracting thing time.

Speaking of which… 9_9

21 engineer cat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:33:38pm

ok, it’s a joke

i’ll try not to wince

22 engineer cat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:37:28pm

re: #17 Backwoods_Sleuth

I see a new accessory for the tiny rubber fetus dolls…

also, how about ‘fully armed’ barbie?

no, wait - all too possible…

23 Slap  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:39:09pm

This is the only coverage on this that I’ve seen today — it seems a little too juicy to be true, but if it is….it’s probably a rare moment of sanity for Fox, but — yay, sanity.

Fox Removes Coulter Column

24 iossarian  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:39:30pm

re: #20 Interesting Times

Speaking of which… 9_9

OMG the derp that would not die.

25 First As Tragedy, Then As Farce  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:41:37pm

I think I have found the universal protest/counterprotest sign.

Image: 5UC6h2D.png

26 stabby  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:44:06pm

uhm how would target practice work again? Pregnant women at shoot ranges with fetuses poking their heads and hands out to shoot?

27 stabby  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:46:10pm

Just a tiny little hand with a gun?

28 stabby  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:47:06pm

re: #8 jamesfirecat

And hating on homosexuals.

I don’t see how “if Marriage were armed…” would end.

29 Lidane  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:48:25pm

re: #23 Slap

This is the only coverage on this that I’ve seen today — it seems a little too juicy to be true, but if it is….it’s probably a rare moment of sanity for Fox, but — yay, sanity.

Fox Removes Coulter Column

Coultergeist suggested that the daughter of a sitting Senator should be shot and killed. I’m sure she thought it was a joke, but John McCain probably didn’t. Not surprising that Faux News took it down.

30 stabby  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:49:28pm

Though it does remind me of “I miss my ex, but my aim is getting better”

31 iossarian  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:50:18pm

I’m outta here - great weekends all round!

32 stabby  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:50:29pm

re: #29 Lidane

Their lawyers simply made them take it down. This is not a sign of sanity at all.

33 Slap  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:54:00pm

re: #29 Lidane

Upding for “Coultergeist”. Still laughing….

34 Kragar  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:54:43pm

re: #13 Charles Johnson

The right is trying their best to make the Gosnell story the Biggest Thing in America. It’s stunning to see the absolute unison screeching going on. I haven’t seen them this worked up about a fake outrage since Benghazi.

“This evidence, it does not prove what you seem to think it proves.”

35 Varek Raith  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:54:59pm

re: #29 Lidane

Coultergeist suggested that the daughter of a sitting Senator should be shot and killed. I’m sure she thought it was a joke, but John McCain probably didn’t. Not surprising that Faux News took it down.

politico.com

36 engineer cat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 1:59:15pm

in o.t. news, panda express is now serving fried rice made completely with brown rice

imagine, fried rice containing 52.8% less guilt!

37 Kragar  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:00:19pm

Pointing to Gosnell as an excuse as to why abortion should be outlawed is just like pointing to snow as proof that Global Warming isn’t occurring.

38 Kragar  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:08:25pm
39 kirkspencer  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:09:14pm

re: #38 Kragar

The Southern Democrats of the 21st century.

40 engineer cat  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:20:59pm

natural marriage

wouldn’t that describe the kind of marriage that german shepherds practice?

41 BongCrodny  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:25:47pm

The best thing about Stockman is if you poke holes in it, stupidity comes out.

42 SpaceJesus  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:28:10pm

This has to be some kind of deep cover leftist troll

43 andres  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:29:35pm

re: #41 BongCrodny

The best thing about Stockman is if you poke holes in it, stupidity comes out.

Problem is, there’s not enough duct tape in this galaxy to contain such stupidity once it’s out.

44 stabby  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:30:44pm

re: #5 jamesfirecat

And if ponies had horns they’d be unicorns, but that does not mean Twilight Sparkle is going to show up and hoof slap some sense into these idiots.

Maybe you can get Tara Strong to do that, she made these..

Youtube Video

Youtube Video
45 Stifford  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 2:51:15pm

Could a woman claim the “Stand Your Ground” defense, versus the armed fetus inside of her? :)

46 Fenris  Fri, Apr 12, 2013 5:41:59pm

On behalf of my district, whom Stockman represents, I apologize. Really. We tried to get rid of him, now all we can do is humor him. Could be gerrymandering at play.

47 labman57  Sat, Apr 13, 2013 10:25:55am

If conservatives had a brain, they wouldn’t know what to do with it.

48 RabbitRunner  Sat, Apr 13, 2013 6:32:47pm

“Texas congressman Steve Stockman’
nuff said


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