New Fave YouTube Comedy Series: Cooking for Vegans and Other Horrible People: “Macrobiotic Milkshake”

The Carrot of Dietary Exceptionalism never lies
Humor • Views: 22,442

YouTube

MACROBIOTIC MILKSHAKE INGREDIENTS

1 cups warm unsweetened almond milk
1/2 cup cooked millet, sauteed in cinnamon
2 tbsp chia seeds
1/4 cup of Amazake
1 tbsp cinnamon
Stevia to taste
1 tbsp almond butter

Blend all in high-speed blender. Serve in long glasses to delude your mind and sprinkle with cinnamon or nutmeg!

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56 comments
1 Rev_Arthur_Icantbreatheing  Apr 24, 2015 2:07:00pm

Living in a small town means you can’t get a Frank N Furter costume on a moment’s notice. :(

2 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 2:07:35pm

re: #1 Rev_Arthur_Icantbreatheing

Living in a small town means you can’t get a Frank N Furter costume on a moment’s notice. :(

Why do you not have one on stand by for emergencies?

3 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 2:07:36pm

Only 1/4 cup of Amazake? One must use at least 6 liters to even taste the stuff. Go for the gusto!

On second thought, my deep research at Wikipedia shows that “Amazake (甘酒, [amazake]) is a traditional sweet, low- or non-alcohol (depending on recipes) Japanese drink made from fermented rice.”

Low or non-alcohol? On third thought, use rye whiskey instead.

4 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 2:09:12pm
5 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 2:12:10pm

‘There are gaps where there are no witnesses and no CCTV coverage,’ of Freddie Gray’s arrest, Baltimore police commissioner says - @VicWJZ
see original on twitter.com

24m
Baltimore police official: Freddie Gray should have received medical attention before he was ever put in the van - @lukebroadwater
see original on twitter.com

Baltimore Police Commissioner Anthony Batts says Freddie Gray was not buckled in after arrest and officers should have taken him to get medical treatment sooner - @Vanessa_Herring
see original on twitter.com

6 Backwoods_Sleuth  Apr 24, 2015 2:15:06pm

re: #5 Justanotherhuman

7 Backwoods_Sleuth  Apr 24, 2015 2:16:21pm

UpChuck will be super excited:

8 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 2:17:44pm

re: #5 Justanotherhuman

‘There are gaps where there are no witnesses and no CCTV coverage,’ of Freddie Gray’s arrest, Baltimore police commissioner says

That’s odd. I’ve been in that neighborhood many, many times over the past thirty-five years and it’s only a slight exaggeration that there are now more CCTV cameras there then there are trees.

9 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 2:20:01pm

re: #7 Backwoods_Sleuth

10 Backwoods_Sleuth  Apr 24, 2015 2:23:01pm

re: #9 Kragar

[Embedded content]

From WaPo:

According to an affidavit filed with the court, U.S. Customs and Border Protection officers detected the drug gamma-butyrolactone, or GBL, in a DHL package from China addressed to Pagan’s home in Northwest Washington on April 9.

GBL, said to build muscle, enhance love-making abilities and aid sleep, breaks down into the “date rape” party drug gamma hydroxybutyrate, or GHB. Both are controlled substances. The package, addressed to “Longevity Concepts LNC, Fred Pagan,” weighed about 1.1 kilograms and was intercepted at a DHL facility in Cincinnati, Waugh said in an affidavit.

On April 23, D.C. police detectives and agents with the U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement’s Homeland Security Investigations arm served an early morning search warrant on Pagan’s home in the 5700 block of Colorado Avenue NWh. They found plastic bags with about 181.5 grams of a substance that tested positive for methamphetamine, according to Special Agent Mark Waugh of the Department of Homeland Security.

The ICE agent said Pagan stated he had received three previous shipments of GBL and knew it was illegal. Pagan said his distributor had him receive the methamphetamine from California to avoid detection, Waugh said, adding that “Pagan stated that he intended to distribute both the GBL and methamphetamine in exchange for sexual favors.”

In a 2006 profile in the Northeast Mississippi Daily Journal, a former teacher of Pagan’s wrote that Pagan has worked for Cochran since Pagan was 16 years old. Pagan reportedly completed high school studies through correspondence and did not attend college, working as a page, then intern and office manager.

yowser…

11 Rev_Arthur_Icantbreatheing  Apr 24, 2015 2:26:13pm

re: #2 Kragar

Why do you not have one on stand by for emergencies?

This is obviously my next move. But for tonight, it’s not an option. :(

12 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 2:28:12pm

re: #10 Backwoods_Sleuth

“… enhance love-making abilities …”

13 Targetpractice  Apr 24, 2015 2:28:18pm

And another:

Another case of cops saying one thing in the report, but the video showing something entirely different. No doubt some more “bad apples.”

14 #FergusonFireside  Apr 24, 2015 2:35:20pm

re: #13 Targetpractice

And another:

[Embedded content]

Another case of cops saying one thing in the report, but the video showing something entirely different. No doubt some more “bad apples.”

There are just so many.

I watched the Palm Beach County video that just got released, the man had a cell phone in his hand, is now paralyzed. (shot in the back)

The cities are paying the civil suit $$ without the cops facing any criminal charges.

It’s like a bounty they don’t mind paying to keep the cops happy in their murderous ways.

15 Charles Johnson  Apr 24, 2015 2:37:46pm

Chuck’s CLINTON SECRET OPPO PROJECT is still stalled at $1030, now after 7 days. Not a single donation today.

16 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 2:37:49pm

re: #14 #FergusonFireside

The cities are paying the civil suit $$ without the cops facing any criminal charges.

It’s like a bounty they don’t mind paying to keep the cops happy in their murderous ways.

Settlements are the new justice, and everyone gets off scott-free. Thanks taxpayers!

17 CuriousLurker  Apr 24, 2015 2:39:01pm
18 TedStriker  Apr 24, 2015 2:39:44pm

re: #6 Backwoods_Sleuth

Sounds like the mayor needs to fire him then.

19 Targetpractice  Apr 24, 2015 2:40:37pm

re: #14 #FergusonFireside

There are just so many.

I watched the Palm Beach County video that just got released, the man had a cell phone in his hand, is now paralyzed. (shot in the back)

The cities are paying the civil suit $$ without the cops facing any criminal charges.

It’s like a bounty they don’t mind paying to keep the cops happy in their murderous ways.

Cities seem to have decided that it’s cheaper to pay settlements than it is to fire cops, deal with the legal costs of making those stick, and train new ones. If it was any other union, the wingnuts would be spittin’ nails and calling for some bustin’. But they’re cops, so obviously their union can’t be corrupt, nosiree.

20 TedStriker  Apr 24, 2015 2:41:14pm

re: #14 #FergusonFireside

There are just so many.

I watched the Palm Beach County video that just got released, the man had a cell phone in his hand, is now paralyzed. (shot in the back)

The cities are paying the civil suit $$ without the cops facing any criminal charges.

It’s like a bounty they don’t mind paying to keep the cops happy in their murderous ways.

Of course…some of them prefer to have “hard men” to keep their populace in line.

21 SteelPH  Apr 24, 2015 2:41:21pm

re: #4 Kragar

Because he did so well with All-Star Crazy Steve.
//

You’d think Holy Terror would’ve been the final nail in his career’s coffin.

22 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 2:45:13pm

re: #17 CuriousLurker

If you say so, Ted…

23 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 2:45:14pm
24 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 2:46:44pm

re: #9 Kragar

Also, he’s been a staffer for a long time. A 1989 photo:

Fred Pagan on the far left
25 Targetpractice  Apr 24, 2015 2:47:43pm

re: #23 Kragar

[Embedded content]

We’re very big on the Constitution…except when it doesn’t agree with us!

26 Charles Johnson  Apr 24, 2015 2:48:08pm
27 Lidane  Apr 24, 2015 2:48:13pm

re: #23 Kragar

They’re all ready to write sternly worded Tweets and FB posts die for their beliefs!

28 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 2:49:27pm

re: #24 Justanotherhuman

Also, he’s been a staffer for a long time. A 1989 photo:

[Embedded content]

The Nike sweatshop labor t-shirts are a nice touch.

29 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 2:50:27pm

re: #28 De Kolta Chair

The Nike sweatshop labor t-shirts are a nice touch.

That’s the “Nike Capital Challenge” — held every year.

30 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 2:53:02pm

Iraqi army recaptures the l-Houz bridge over the Euphrates in Ramadi, primary supply route for Islamic State militants - @AP

Iraqi General, 3 Officers Killed in Islamic State Ambush

nytimes.com

“Earlier on Friday, the army had recaptured the important al-Houz bridge over the Euphrates in western Ramadi, which had served as a primary supply route for the militants, according to police Col. Mahdi Abbas.”

31 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 2:53:05pm

re: #27 Lidane

They’re all ready to write sternly worded Tweets and FB posts die for their beliefs!

Can they just go do that without bothering the rest of us then?

32 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 2:55:22pm

re: #29 Justanotherhuman

That’s the “Nike Capital Challenge” — held every year.

I vaguely recall reading about that once. Three miles, isn’t it?

Full disclosure: Simply running after a bus wipes me out to the extent that I have to recover at the nearest pub.

33 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 2:55:46pm

Allegedly. We know who UF believes. Video, or it didn’t happen.

University of Florida suspends fraternity after members allegedly spat at, insulted veterans - @ERINDREWKENT
see original on twitter.com

34 Backwoods_Sleuth  Apr 24, 2015 2:56:10pm

re: #15 Charles Johnson

He still hasn’t caught the news about Thad Cochran yet, either.

heh

35 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 2:56:38pm

re: #32 De Kolta Chair

I vaguely recall reading about that once. Three miles, right?

Full disclosure: Simply running after a bus wipes me out to the extent that I have to recover at the nearest pub.

I dunno. I never ran, was just a “power walker”. : )

36 #FergusonFireside  Apr 24, 2015 2:56:45pm

re: #33 Justanotherhuman

Allegedly. We know who UF believes. Video, or it didn’t happen.

University of Florida suspends fraternity after members allegedly spat at, insulted veterans - @ERINDREWKENT
see original on twitter.com

Hopefully not. That’s my alma mater. :(

37 Lord Of The Pies  Apr 24, 2015 2:59:14pm

“Macrobiotic milkshake”

How about Cappuccino Cheesecake Pie?

38 Backwoods_Sleuth  Apr 24, 2015 3:04:17pm

re: #37 Lord Of The Pies

Did you see the Amazon link for the 99 cent Kindle cookbook Me, Myself and Pie I left for you downstairs?

39 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 3:04:48pm

re: #35 Justanotherhuman

I dunno. I never ran, was just a “power walker”. : )

I try to walk an hour a day. I like to think of it as “ambling dynamism.”

Perhaps we could collaborate on a book and get filthy rich, and then we can take limos everywhere? Seriously, my puppies are pooped out.

40 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 3:06:47pm
41 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 3:08:09pm

Wow, they finally sent someone to mow the overgrowth.

42 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 3:10:12pm

Marchers commemorating the Armenian Genocide march on Wilshire Boulevard in Los Angles [sic]

43 Charles Johnson  Apr 24, 2015 3:10:23pm

Got a new refrigerator a couple of years ago - well, this week it decided to stop refrigerating.

Man, am I glad I got the extended warranty this time. Repairman came out and fixed it for free, and the warranty covers reimbursement for spoiled food - about $250 worth including everything that was in the freezer.

44 calochortus  Apr 24, 2015 3:10:36pm

re: #40 Kragar

[Embedded content]

I never understand why people who claim to favor marriage don’t want everyone to be able to marry the person they love. But what do I know?

45 Khal Wimpo  Apr 24, 2015 3:13:06pm

re: #19 Targetpractice

Cities seem to have decided that it’s cheaper to pay settlements than it is to fire cops, deal with the legal costs of making those stick, and train new ones.

You’ve hit the nail on the head, here. We would help the risk managers work on the formula - basically, to figure out if the case went public, how much exposure the city would face. It all started when Rampart went so far off the rails, and the city of LA basically had to open up a drive-thru window for people (some of whom were innocents railroaded, but many of whom were straight-up nasty crooks) to pull up & collect fat sacks o’ cash.

The public really doesn’t understand all the little quirks in CCP Section 3303 et seq., also known as “The Police Officers Bill of Rights.” But they should. Alas, it takes more than a 6-second soundbite in a 30-second ad to explain how much this costs local government.

46 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 3:13:47pm

re: #44 calochortus

I never understand why people who claim to favor marriage don’t want everyone to be able to marry the person they love. But what do I know?

Its almost as if they’re mostly interested in pushing their religious beliefs onto everyone…

WAIT ONE FUCKING MINUTE!

47 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 3:15:58pm

Would that include pot? : )

Hawaii Legislature passes bill that would make Hawaii first state to raise legal smoking age to 21 - @FOX5Vegas
see original on twitter.com

48 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 3:16:20pm

re: #44 calochortus

I never understand why people who claim to favor marriage don’t want everyone to be able to marry the person they love. But what do I know?

///

49 calochortus  Apr 24, 2015 3:16:52pm

re: #46 Kragar

Its almost as if they’re mostly interested in pushing their religious beliefs onto everyone…

WAIT ONE FUCKING MINUTE!

Funny thing, that.

I’ve been married for nearly 38 years. I like being married to my husband. He apparently likes being married to me. Other people sharing their lives with each other couldn’t possibly have a negative impact on our marriage, or our enjoyment of it.
Makes you wonder about the people who get upset about same sex, or any other sort of marriage.

50 Kragar  Apr 24, 2015 3:20:10pm

Perhaps nothing is as demoralizing as religious hypocrisy; it destroys not only perpetrators but witnesses. Every time a non-believer observes adherents acting in contradiction to the precepts of their faith, the non-believer is only strengthened in his resistance to God’s call. We are not talking about the usual human failings but outrageous, repugnant, destructive violations. The scandal of false Christianity forms an insurmountable stumbling block for some who are being called to conversion. For this reason I am exposing the hypocrisy of Tea Party members who claim they are defending Christianity-a way of life they don’t follow.

51 Justanotherhuman  Apr 24, 2015 3:22:33pm

re: #43 Charles Johnson

Well, that sure was worth it. : )

One thing I’ve noticed, though, while house hunting lately, is that the trend seems to be that people leave their fridges behind now. I suppose they don’t always fit in the new place or they want a better model. Maybe that’s because people want them included in the contract, also, and they’re not worth haggling over.

20 yrs ago you had to buy your own appliances, unless it was an installed one, such as a slide-in range, dishwasher or oven. Nowadays, people leave everything, in the kitchen, at least, and some even leave the washer and dryer.

52 CuriousLurker  Apr 24, 2015 3:23:01pm

Since today marks the 100th anniversary of the 1915 Genocide I was poking around trying to find out more, especially after the U.S. being criticized for not using the word “genocide”. Turns out only 26 countries have actually recognized it as such. WTF?

Here’s where it gets really messed up:

After following several cited sources in various Wikipedia pages on the subject, I came across an article published back in 2012 by a Maltese newspaper named The Malta Independent that explained how in 1919 over 100 Turks were deported to Malta to face charges for war crimes, including the Armenian genocide, but “the lack of concrete evidence and an appropriate legal framework with supranational jurisdiction resulted in the Turkish detainees being repatriated and freed in exchange for 22 British prisoners held by Mustafa Kemal (Ataturk).”

So basically it just didn’t get handled and the Turks walked. How effed up is that? The article was a bit hard to follow as I’m not familiar with the subject, but I nonetheless found it interesting. I think that those of you who like history will very much enjoy reading it.

Turkey’s EU Minister, Judge Giovanni Bonello And the Armenian Genocide - ‘Claim about Malta Trials is nonsense’

This important but seemingly forgotten chapter of modern colonial history was treated by Judge Bonello in one of his volumes in the Histories of Malta series published by Fondazzjoni Patrimonju Malti.

Following a story carried yesterday by this newspaper quoting the remarks made by the Turkish EU Minister regarding the Armenian Genocide which he referred to as an ‘incident’, Dr Bonello alerted The Malta Independent to clarify that these remarks are simply “nonsense”. He referred us to volume nine of the Histories of Malta series which dedicates a particular chapter titled ‘The “Malta Trials” and the Turkish-Armenian Question’ to this controversial issue.

Dr Bonello explains that following World War I no international norms for regulating war crimes existed. He claims that it was only through a series of engineered coincidences that WWI did not end in the “Malta Trials” the way WWII led to the Nuremberg Trials. He defined the legal vacuum encountered in 1919 as “a legal nightmare, a terra incognita that for a first time challenged legal minds to figure out solutions to phenomena unfamiliar before in the history of warfare and its aftermath.” Although events that took place in Malta at the time feature quite prominently in Turkish histories, according to the author they remain completely unknown or ignored in Malta. […]

Sheesh, I did it again, didn’t I? This is definitely long enough to be a Page, so I guess I’m gonna go post it as such.

53 Higgs Boson's Mate  Apr 24, 2015 3:25:05pm

re: #23 Kragar

Seeing as how a vanishingly small percentage of them even took the chance that they might die for their fucking country their “uprising” will consist of nothing more than whining to each other extra hard on Twitter.

54 De Kolta Chair  Apr 24, 2015 3:26:18pm

re: #50 Kragar

[Embedded content]

Speaking of the Texas Observer, when I was growing up in Tucson in the sixties and seventies, the Observer was a godsend, and a monthly reminder that not everyone in the southwest was a peckerwood. In a word, they kick major arse. ;-)

55 Ace-o-aces  Apr 24, 2015 3:27:50pm

re: #40 Kragar

56 Lidane  Apr 24, 2015 3:28:01pm

Trolling 101:


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