Dallas Police HQ Attacked: Sniper Shoots Suspect in “Zombie Assault Vehicle”

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A man who said he blamed police for losing custody of his son, and for labeling him as a “terrorist,” has reportedly been shot dead by a sniper after a stand-off that lasted several hours. Luckily no one was injured when he fired dozens of rounds at police headquarters; he also had numerous explosive devices.

But the strangest part of the story: he was driving an armored vehicle with gun ports, described by the manufacturer as a “Zombie Apocalypse Assault Vehicle and Troop Transport.”

The van had a Georgia license plate, and online records indicate that a company in Newman, Ga., sold a similar vehicle on eBay for $8,250.

The company that sold it, Jenco Sales Inc., described the vehicle on Facebook: “Zombie Apocalypse Assault Vehicle and Troop Transport. This full armored zombie busting vehicle features convenient gun ports so no zombie juice touches you during a mass zombie take down. It also has benches in the back so you can take turns resting during long Zombie sieges. The tactical step boards are installed for when you only need swords and axes for drive by mow downs. The bumpers are made of reinforced steel tubing, so no dents from smashing zombie heads! It’s full armor plated and has bullet proof windows just in case you run into other zombie hunting hordes who might try to take this bad boy from you. Like anything, there is a price attached to this fine piece of zombie fighting machinery.”

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