The Bob & Chez Show: Gay Mosquitoes

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Today’s program from our podcasting affiliate, The Bob & Chez Show:

Gay Mosquitoes: The Trump Versus Bernie Debate; Trump Gets Played; Jimmy Kimmel Subverted Trump Then Humanized Him; Trump’s Best Words About Farmers; The Libertarian Billionaire Behind the Gawker Lawsuit; Debbie Wasserman Schultz Has to Go; Louie Gohmert’s Epic Rant About Gay Space Colonists; and more.

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81 comments
1
Wendell Zurkowitz (slave to the waffle light)  May 27, 2016 • 11:11:59am

One person killed and another injured in separate bee attacks in Arizona today. What if these bees carry Zika?

2
I Would Prefer Not To  May 27, 2016 • 11:13:00am

I hope everyone (In the US) has a great Memorial Day weekend. I’m heading to Rehoboth, DE. Not sure why, but it might be fun. Remember your sunscreen.

3
Charles Johnson  May 27, 2016 • 11:13:23am
4
I Would Prefer Not To  May 27, 2016 • 11:15:20am

re: #3 Charles Johnson

[Embedded content]

If you really want a laugh go to the page that shows how little funding they have been promised.

5
lawhawk  May 27, 2016 • 11:16:37am

Oh how cute:

Not a single word about reforming the NSC after the Iraq debacle or 9/11, but now?

If that doesn’t lay bare the GOP/right wing cognitive dissonance from reality, nothing does.

All they see is a Democrat in the WH and they want to burn it all down, criticize every single act, even if those acts include adopting items that Heritage itself was championing just a few years earlier (see mandate, individual).

What a bunch of hacks.

6
jaunte  May 27, 2016 • 11:18:23am

“…I’m more than a little creeped out about where the minds of men such as Paxton and Patrick seem to go when they think about public restrooms. There’s a certain predilection for prurience in drawing a straight line between “public restroom” and “opportunity to sexually assault a woman or child.” In the most disturbing example, U.S. Congressman Louie Gohmert, the East Texas Republican, recently said in a radio interview that he’d have jumped at the chance to pretend to be transgender as a teenager in order to infiltrate the girls’ bathroom at his school.
When I think about public restrooms, I’m usually thinking about whether there’s going to be a functional soap dispenser or one of those fun Dyson hand dryers. I’m less likely to wonder if they will afford me an opportunity to commit a sex crime.”

7
wrenchwench  May 27, 2016 • 11:20:13am

The closer: [Do click thru & RTWT]

Trump is just another incarnation of George Armstrong Custer, and we got your Crazy Horse.
Read more at indiancountrytodaymedianetwork.com

8
Kragar  May 27, 2016 • 11:22:43am
9
Dr. Matt  May 27, 2016 • 11:29:27am
10
jaunte  May 27, 2016 • 11:43:28am
11
Lidane  May 27, 2016 • 11:44:18am

Please proceed:

12
KingKenrod  May 27, 2016 • 11:44:51am

Trump currently giving a speech in Fresno. Already been talking for over an hour.

13
Wendell Zurkowitz (slave to the waffle light)  May 27, 2016 • 11:46:38am

re: #11 Lidane

Please proceed:

He really does not want to be president if he does nothing to unite his party behind him.

14
SteveMcGaziBolaGate RN  May 27, 2016 • 11:47:03am

My thoughts about the “rounding up” of illegal immigrants:
“Rounding them up” implies that brown skinned people who fit the description will be stopped on the street and forced to prove their innocence on the spot. I think I’d be hard pressed to prove I’m a citizen. I guess it would take about a month to get a copy of my birth certificate (Which I tried to do when I applied for a Jersey nursing license).
It’s going to be extremely expensive to run an operation like this. You’re gonna need a department bigger than the TSA for starters.
I happen to think the government has a duty to its citizens to prosecute and ultimately deport Illegal aliens who get caught up in the legal system for whatever reason, or turn them back at the border, or whatever routine actions are taken with people trying to enter illegally. I just don’t believe we should be casting out a net for them. I had a couple employees who were probably here illegally. I paid them the same as everybody else, treated them as best I could just like everybody else, and I didn’t sweat their status. Even if I knew whether they were here legally or not, I wouldn’t have acted on it. If somebody can get here and live their life under the radar, I don’t see any reason to go after them.

15
jaunte  May 27, 2016 • 11:47:22am

re: #12 KingKenrod

” Mr. Trump has also been dismissive of data analytics, suggesting in interviews that his showmanship and rallies will continue to be effective.”
nytimes.com

16
SteveMcGaziBolaGate RN  May 27, 2016 • 11:47:58am

re: #13 Wendell Zurkowitz (slave to the waffle light)

He really does not want to be president if he does nothing to unite his party behind him.

The party will have to come to him.

17
Testy Toad T  May 27, 2016 • 11:48:38am

re: #13 Wendell Zurkowitz (slave to the waffle light)

He really does not want to be president if he does nothing to unite his party behind him.

He wants to be a yuuuuuge winner in the election, but I don’t think he actually wants the job.

18
CriticalDragon1177  May 27, 2016 • 11:52:20am
19
unproven innocence  May 27, 2016 • 11:52:54am

re: #17 Testy Toad T

He wants to be a yuuuuuge winner in the election, but I don’t think he actually wants the job.

Maybe Trump will sublet the WH to the highest bidder —step1 of running the government like a business.

20
CriticalDragon1177  May 27, 2016 • 11:54:10am

re: #11 Lidane

21
CriticalDragon1177  May 27, 2016 • 11:54:38am
22
CriticalDragon1177  May 27, 2016 • 11:57:02am

Here’s something that CRACKED’s readers suggest that we do to fix our broken educational system, and I have to agree with them.

To bad creationists and other science deniers will continue to fight our efforts to stop it from happening.

23
jaunte  May 27, 2016 • 11:57:43am

re: #19 unproven innocence

Maybe Trump will sublet the WH to the highest bidder —step1 of running the government like a business.

They’re already talking about him acting as “chairman of the board” instead of CEO.

24
Charles Johnson  May 27, 2016 • 11:58:14am
25
goddamnedfrank  May 27, 2016 • 11:59:07am

Oh please let this happen. May Trump’s ego force him to waste tons of money fighting for a home state he cannot possibly win.

26
CriticalDragon1177  May 27, 2016 • 12:00:59pm
27
Lidane  May 27, 2016 • 12:02:35pm

re: #22 CriticalDragon1177

28
Barefoot Grin  May 27, 2016 • 12:04:27pm
Create your own Donald Trump slogan with the LGF Trump Bumper Sticker Generator! http://lgf.bz/1sAlIOa
29
Testy Toad T  May 27, 2016 • 12:05:18pm

re: #25 goddamnedfrank

You cannot fucking make this shit up:

Asked for comment about his management style, and the current state of his campaign, Mr. Trump declined, criticizing the reporters writing this article. “You two wouldn’t know how to write a good story about me if you tried — dream on,” Mr. Trump said in an email relayed by his spokeswoman, Hope Hicks.

A work of fiction written around the rise of Donald Trump would be derided as absurd and unbelievable, unhinged from sense.

30
Big Beautiful Door  May 27, 2016 • 12:05:24pm

re: #13 Wendell Zurkowitz (slave to the waffle light)

He really does not want to be president if he does nothing to unite his party behind him.

He doesn’t have to, they are all crawling to him. Just look at Marco Rubio who just pledged his fealty to the Donald.

31
Big Beautiful Door  May 27, 2016 • 12:07:14pm

re: #17 Testy Toad T

He wants to be a yuuuuuge winner in the election, but I don’t think he actually wants the job.

Paul Manafort said as much. Trump wants to be Chairman of the Board, and he plans to let his VP run the government.

32
CriticalDragon1177  May 27, 2016 • 12:07:35pm

re: #27 Lidane

that is so true!

33
makeitstop  May 27, 2016 • 12:07:53pm

OT: Reason number 550,692* why Cheap Trick is my favorite band:

radio.com: Have you gotten any blowback from the thing you said about not playing the Republican National Convention?

Zander: “The thing is, we had an idea, I don’t know if you heard this or not…”

radio.com: You turned down a lot of money!

“It was $100,000! We considered it, but we said we’d have to make guitars with swastikas to make it make sense.

Link

* an approximate number

34
Big Beautiful Door  May 27, 2016 • 12:09:42pm

re: #25 goddamnedfrank

[Embedded content]

Oh please let this happen. May Trump’s ego force him to waste tons of money fighting for a home state he cannot possibly win.

He said he wants to win California as well. That’ll soak up a lot of money and time if he is serious.

35
Skip Intro  May 27, 2016 • 12:11:22pm

re: #29 Testy Toad T

See, here’s the whole problem. They’re not supposed to write “good” stories about Trump. That’s what his flaks and Fox News is for.

They’re supposed to write accurate stories about Trump, which is something up with he will not put.

36
unproven innocence  May 27, 2016 • 12:14:14pm

re: #31 Big Beautiful Door

Paul Manafort said as much. Trump wants to be Chairman of the Board, and he plans to let his VP run the government.

One major job for any VP is already clearly spelled out in our Constitution, presiding over the Senate, and in cases of tied votes, he/she can then cast a vote to break the tie. Expanding such powers to overseeing the entire Executive Branch is clearly unconstitutional.

Oh. “…plans to let his VP run the government.” Nevermind.

37
iossarian  May 27, 2016 • 12:15:10pm

re: #21 CriticalDragon1177

Where’s the bit about promoting vast left-wing conspiracies to thwart American Progress and DESTROY FREEDOM?

38
Skip Intro  May 27, 2016 • 12:19:23pm

re: #31 Big Beautiful Door

Paul Manafort said as much. Trump wants to be Chairman of the Board, and he plans to let his VP run the government.

Trump will be far to busy traveling around the world trying to save his golf courses from the effects of non extant global warming to be bothered governing.

39
bratwurst  May 27, 2016 • 12:25:08pm

Somebody finally managed to encapsulate my feelings about Marco Rubio within the cozy confines of a single tweet!

40
Kragar  May 27, 2016 • 12:25:33pm
41
Skip Intro  May 27, 2016 • 12:27:39pm

Marco Rubio Flips, Then Flops, Then Flips Again

Nobody illustrates the GOP’s complete lack of core beliefs better than Little Marco.

nymag.com

42
goddamnedfrank  May 27, 2016 • 12:28:04pm
43
Timothy Watson  May 27, 2016 • 12:29:18pm

re: #40 Kragar

[Embedded content]

Trump is the Howard Beale of Presidential candidates.

And that’s an insult to Howard Beale.

44
KGxvi  May 27, 2016 • 12:34:15pm

re: #14 SteveMcGaziBolaGate RN

My thoughts about the “rounding up” of illegal immigrants:
“Rounding them up” implies that brown skinned people who fit the description will be stopped on the street and forced to prove their innocence on the spot. I think I’d be hard pressed to prove I’m a citizen. I guess it would take about a month to get a copy of my birth certificate (Which I tried to do when I applied for a Jersey nursing license).
It’s going to be extremely expensive to run an operation like this. You’re gonna need a department bigger than the TSA for starters.
I happen to think the government has a duty to its citizens to prosecute and ultimately deport Illegal aliens who get caught up in the legal system for whatever reason, or turn them back at the border, or whatever routine actions are taken with people trying to enter illegally. I just don’t believe we should be casting out a net for them. I had a couple employees who were probably here illegally. I paid them the same as everybody else, treated them as best I could just like everybody else, and I didn’t sweat their status. Even if I knew whether they were here legally or not, I wouldn’t have acted on it. If somebody can get here and live their life under the radar, I don’t see any reason to go after them.

Something the wall fetishists seem to forget/ignore is that of the 12 million or so illegal aliens in the country, about half of them came here legally and then overstayed their visas. Personally, I’m of the mind that immigration should be easier, not harder. Basically, open border with background checks.

45
makeitstop  May 27, 2016 • 12:40:00pm

Quiet in here today! Did everybody go to the beach or something?

46
ObserverArt  May 27, 2016 • 12:40:34pm

re: #19 unproven innocence

Maybe Trump will sublet the WH to the highest bidder —step1 of running the government like a business.

Isn’t that what the Clinton’s were accused of? Like The Lincoln Bedroom for Hollywood types or something.

47
I Would Prefer Not To  May 27, 2016 • 12:41:06pm

re: #45 makeitstop

Quiet in here today! Did everybody go to the beach or something?

or something. It’s called work. Get off my lawn.

48
Shiplord Kirel  May 27, 2016 • 12:42:00pm

Dr Heimlich I presume? Surgeon, 96, performs lifesaving technique named after him in an emergency for the FIRST TIME on a 87-year-old woman choking on a burger

Dr Henry Heimlich, the 96-year-old Cincinnati surgeon credited with inventing the lifesaving technique named after him, used it for the first time this week to save a fellow senior center resident who was choking on a hamburger.
Heimlich, who in multiple national television appearances had demonstrated the Heimlich Maneuver to dislodge food from an airway, had never employed it in an emergency, said center spokesman Ken Paley on Friday.
Heimlich was sitting at a communal dining table at Cincinnati’s Deupree House, an upscale senior living center where he lives, on Monday and noticed fellow resident Patty Ris, 87, in distress while eating an open-faced hamburger.

49
makeitstop  May 27, 2016 • 12:43:22pm

re: #47 I Would Prefer Not To

or something. It’s called work. Get off my lawn.

Hey, I’m working, too! Kinda.

50
klys (maker of Silmarils)  May 27, 2016 • 12:45:00pm

re: #45 makeitstop

Quiet in here today! Did everybody go to the beach or something?

Slow to wake up today, and then an hour on the elliptical. Evil machine.

51
unproven innocence  May 27, 2016 • 12:45:02pm

re: #46 ObserverArt

Isn’t that what the Clinton’s were accused of? Like The Lincoln Bedroom for Hollywood types or something.

Or like Nixon inviting Elvis, to help with PR for his war on drugs. /

52
plansbandc  May 27, 2016 • 12:47:00pm

I really really love the f’ed up clown music on B and C’s show.

53
Timothy Watson  May 27, 2016 • 12:47:06pm

re: #49 makeitstop

Hey, I’m working, too! Kinda.

Ditto.

54
ObserverArt  May 27, 2016 • 12:51:32pm

re: #40 Kragar

James Cook ✔ ‎@BBCJamesCook

In Fresno, Donald Trump says environmentalists are to blame for California’s drought and he will solve it by “opening up the water”.

2:20 PM - 27 May 2016

Wow! Trump is just like God, he can open up the water.

So, I guess instead of the Holy Trinity we really have discovered the Quantitative Quaternity. The Father, The Son, The Holy Ghost and The Donald.

I guess it really does mean he can make all things great again.

55
Lidane  May 27, 2016 • 12:51:47pm
56
iossarian  May 27, 2016 • 12:52:59pm

re: #49 makeitstop

Hey, I’m working, too! Kinda.

My guess is everyone with a jerb (thanks Obama) is either working furiously in order to leave early, or has left early.

57
Skip Intro  May 27, 2016 • 12:58:00pm

re: #55 Lidane

Dr. Sleepy welcomes the Nazis onto the SS Trump.

“Trump did not ask for my forgiveness,” Carson said, “but he accepted it.” He added, “I understand what he was doing, no problem,” attributing it to “what politicians do.”

When Swan asked about the white nationalist, alt-right elements being drawn to Trump’s campaign, Carson punted, saying, “I can’t speak for them.”

However, he said that “I’m hopeful that we can get all these different groups that we’re all in the same boat.

mediaite.com

58
Big Beautiful Door  May 27, 2016 • 12:58:15pm

Probably not the news you want the star of your big budget movie making premier weekend.

slate.com

59
Lidane  May 27, 2016 • 12:58:51pm

This is excellent news for John McCain Mitt Romney Donald Trump!

60
Charles Johnson  May 27, 2016 • 1:01:01pm

The latest garbage from The Intercept:

If you read the quote it does not mention “rape.” This is a completely bogus accusation, attributing something to BNR’s Melissa McEwen that she absolutely did not write or intend.

61
Charles Johnson  May 27, 2016 • 1:03:20pm
62
TK-421  May 27, 2016 • 1:05:20pm

re: #24 Charles Johnson

63
gocart mozart  May 27, 2016 • 1:07:09pm

re: #18 CriticalDragon1177

64
Testy Toad T  May 27, 2016 • 1:09:36pm

re: #55 Lidane

If there is to be a Trump-Sanders debate, I want the first (hell, only) question to be “which of you has the more damaging surrogates?”

65
ObserverArt  May 27, 2016 • 1:10:11pm

Just read that NY Times article “Donald Trump’s Campaign Stumbles as It Tries to Go Big” linked earlier in goddamnedfrank’s #25.

Sounds like he might not have the guts for this campaigning stuff, especially in a coordinated and disciplined way. He wants to wing it and probably do it on his time.

Hmmm. A low energy candidate!

I guess he has no respect for the Clinton’s and their considerable political machine. Hope they drive right over the yam man.

66
plansbandc  May 27, 2016 • 1:12:02pm

Gohmert reminds me of the quote from Peter Schickele (an alleged review of PDQ Bach’s music…) “Hats back on gentlemen, an idiot.”

67
jaunte  May 27, 2016 • 1:13:26pm
“…leave questions about whether Mr. Trump is the business genius he claims to be on one side. Does business success carry with it the knowledge and instincts needed to make good economic policy? No, it doesn’t.
…..
…while we haven’t had many business leaders in the White House, we do know what kind of advice prominent businessmen give on economic policy. And it’s often startlingly bad, for two reasons. One is that wealthy, powerful people sometimes don’t know what they don’t know — and who’s going to tell them? The other is that a country is nothing like a corporation, and running a national economy is nothing like running a business.”

[Trump] doesn’t seem to have a working knowledge of what the president actually does.

68
gocart mozart  May 27, 2016 • 1:13:53pm
69
Charles Johnson  May 27, 2016 • 1:15:42pm
70
gocart mozart  May 27, 2016 • 1:16:30pm
71
Eclectic Cyborg  May 27, 2016 • 1:16:35pm

re: #40 Kragar

So Trump thinks he is Moses now?

72
Testy Toad T  May 27, 2016 • 1:16:37pm

re: #69 Charles Johnson

Thank God.

73
allegro  May 27, 2016 • 1:18:44pm

re: #71 Eclectic Cyborg

So Trump thinks he is Moses now?

Moses was a loser, let me tell you. Couldn’t close the deal. Sad!

74
bratwurst  May 27, 2016 • 1:19:11pm

I feel like the onset of the holiday weekend is denying us the full rage-gasm over Obama’s “apology” at Hiroshima.

The nerve of that man!

75
iossarian  May 27, 2016 • 1:20:58pm

re: #73 allegro

Moses was a loser, let me tell you. Couldn’t close the deal. Sad!

I admire Moses! Got things done! Learned a lot about him growing up in the gospels.

76
No Depression  May 27, 2016 • 1:21:15pm

This should go over pretty well. /

77
Eclectic Cyborg  May 27, 2016 • 1:23:00pm
78
makeitstop  May 27, 2016 • 1:23:36pm

re: #56 iossarian

My guess is everyone with a jerb (thanks Obama) is either working furiously in order to leave early, or has left early.

I’m self-employed, so I came into today’s work list knowing I was going to slow-walk it - and got most of the heavy lifting done yesterday.

My poor wife, on the other hand, was scheduled for a ‘quick check-in’ last night at 11:00. She was still at it when I fell asleep, and was in front of her computer when I woke up. Her ‘quick check-in’ went 100 different flavors of sideways and she worked all night. And after two hours of sleep earlier this afternoon, she’s back at it.

79
Eric The Fruit Bat  May 27, 2016 • 3:07:07pm

After a grueling banging my head-against-the-wall problem that turns out was totally self-inflicted (forgot to insert a preprocessor directive), after applying 470+ patches and mass regeneration’s of source, copybooks and macros I’m ready to turn over our sandbox over to the developers to do a mass retrofit. This ought to be fun, as the new code is 64-bit based, and we’ll need to go through our own custom code to make sure our own code is modified so its threadsafe so we can exploit the zIIPs.

Now I can unfurl a Bagster so I can dump all of my crumpled up Coke Zero bottles in my home office and start my real home improvement project that I’ve been collecting all of the materials but haven’t pulled the trigger and actually started - laying down laminate for the home office and the dining area (and either the living room or bedroom, depending if I still have enough materials.)

1/Kg9qevYUprfPruTQ1PgXOjWf4BcZuhRyMs1GjW9qKAqu9TlZILAeEcHqWmghEufnAaPzOwABZCJVL6wMwIsKaq57ykDfTDtw1bIJNZW77ZVcwA6dqz0om83HbiXoW6w/S4OHYGxMnbVnSSQKNYSpelD34hSks9NWShWvZIwM4sH2oDdnPbRbVjucM7+zjnsEJ2ipgoqvpiUDOCmQiObpskcwUZ7tbXTsA+lbnr/2p0/snnit/1MXJDOI/ccfx6cNnC2eBROOnuCzcVnjWxMt10ShgB7uo4tyqq/1PUX3K1XfLV6V7hcsk0lTfHgbrsjXPpyMWkOA6Ovn8JhNOF84kjqnfejb4I9yL+RjY/ZTGGpxhKORX+z5PSaNhOWzwUuxOZ0usuCNT2IfaCxxcQI4nJvCUuKlnO5Ip4MFtQbGu2GrSIedteRVqnS8paM3M4

80
meteor  May 27, 2016 • 4:40:53pm

“They’re building landing strips for gay Martians!” The entire Republican party sounds like the song “Stuart” by the Dead Milkmen.

The Dead Milkmen - Stuart

81
Eventual Carrion  May 27, 2016 • 6:16:39pm

re: #2 I Would Prefer Not To

I hope everyone (In the US) has a great Memorial Day weekend. I’m heading to Rehoboth, DE. Not sure why, but it might be fun. Remember your sunscreen.

And your towel.

Wanna get high?


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