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Cooking for Vegans and Other Horrible People: Sushi for Pregnant Women

McGyvering foods together that in no way, shape or form should you be allowed to eat
Humor • Views: 25,535

YouTube

Join Rachel Staman as she cooks for Vegans and Other Horrible People.

Episode 2- Sushi for Pregnant Women

Here’s how ya do it:

Ingredients:
Personal watermelon, or about 1/4 of a big boy.
2 tablespoons oil
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1 cup cooked sushi rice
Green onions, chopped (for garnish)
Teriyaki sauce or jizz

Directions:
Preheat the oven to Broil.
Cut up watermelon pieces to the size of little dominos and put them on a tin foiled sheet and drizzle with the olive oil and soy sauce.
Bake for about 90 minutes, turning every so often to not burn.
Remove the watermelon from the oven, and let it cool. It looks like fish!
Form the cooked rice into the shape of sashimi.
Top each rice roll with a piece of the watermelon.
Garnish with chopped green onions, and optional teriyaki jizz.

Enjoy the sushi your little parasite has heretofore robbed you the pleasure of enjoying.

Video: Jon Stewart’s “Don’t Mess With Sexes”

Not all states will accept decency without a fight
Humor • Views: 24,651

Comedy Central Video

Let’s kick off this Tuesday with Jon Stewart, thoroughly deflating the dishonest and hypocritical right wing fight against same sex marriage.

Video: John Oliver Dissects the Bogus Economics of the NCAA

Yes, there’s an official ladder
Humor • Views: 20,148

YouTube

John Oliver continues a string of hits, with this meticulous dissection of the terrible economics of the NCAA — also known as one of the biggest scams in America.

The NCAA doesn’t pay athletes because they consider them amateurs. The NCAA considers them amateurs because they don’t get paid.

Cooking for Vegans and Other Horrible People: Hangover Food

Listen to the carrot of dietary exceptionalism
Humor • Views: 23,407

YouTube

Join Rachel Staman as she cooks for Vegans and Other Horrible People.

Episode 1 - Breakfast Skillet for Vegans

INGREDIENTS:

1 package of Gardein Home Style Beefless tips
1 package of Simply Potatoes Hash Browns
2 handfuls of of vegan cheese
a few tablespoons of vegetable oil
1 block of extra firm tofu
onion powder
garlic powder
salt
2 spoons of tahini
1 spoon of soy sauce or tamari
1 spoon dijon mustard
big dash of of tumeric
vegan barbecue sauce (no worcestershire)

DIRECTIONS:

1. In a well-oiled (spray it) 12 inch non stick skillet, line the bottom with Simply Potatoes. Sprinkle with onion, salt, and garlic powder. Press so its even. Cook 6 to 7 minutes to be lightly browned. Set the timer. You’re drunk.

2. While this is cooking, crumble the tofu with your hands, so that there are still some visible pieces, but it’s broken up quite thoroughly. Lay on a paper towel. And whisk together your tahini, tamari, mustard, and turmeric mixture.

3. Take the potato skillet out, drizzle more oil. Turn the potatoes over with spatula in sections. Sprinkle with cheese. Continue cooking 6-8 minutes.

4. Oil 2 pans and put on medium heat. Add the tofu to one pan, along with the tahini mixture. Mix the ingredients together thoroughly and cook till the tofu is warmed through, about 4 minutes or so.

4. While you’re stirring this pan, stay close to the other pan and warm up the Beefless tips. Simply pour out the beef nuggets and watch them not burn.

6. Take out your skillet and top with “eggs” and crown it with your “ribs”. Lather with BBQ sauce and you’re good to eat.

Trevor Moore’s Alternate Universe Kitty History

Parallel kitteh worlds
Humor • Views: 22,024

YouTube

In this vast uncharted universe, somewhere there is a planet on which the kittehs have their own catspiracy theories.

Jon Stewart to Rudy Giuliani: “You Know You’re Not the Mayor of 9/11, Right?”

You know who else served in World War II?
Humor • Views: 19,660

Comedy Central Video

You knew Jon Stewart would have a savagely funny take on Rudy Giuliani’s asinine offensive comments about President Obama, and here it is.

Video: Jon Stewart on Brian Williams: All Hail the Guardians of the Veracity

Why Bri lie?
Humor • Views: 21,850

Comedy Central Video

Jon Stewart has a great take on the Brian Williams scandal; he cuts Williams no breaks, but points out the monumental hypocrisy of his loudest critics.

Video: John Oliver Skewers Big Pharma

A little like a high school boyfriend
Humor • Views: 21,461

YouTube

The anti-vaccination movement is incredibly self-destructive and flat out stupid, but as John Oliver points out in this excellent segment from Last Week Tonight, the pharmacology industry is not always sane or ethical, either.

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 Frank says:

All right, Zubin, hit it! -- Frank's onstage cue to conductor Zubin Mehta during their collaborative effort with the L.A. Philharmonic orchestra in 1970