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1 freetoken  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 1:52:51am

Interesting, and probably a bit controversial.

Anyway…

… dating just becomes a technique pattern to get the other party’s pants off.

Now your telling me that’s not what dating is supposed to be about?

2 Eclectic Cyborg  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 6:20:56am

I think this is in part a result of our “instant gratification” culture. People don’t want to do the work of building an actual relationship they just want the sex as fast as they can get it and, as you pointed out, the fact our society glamorizes these kinds of arrangements just makes it worse.

Not that I am a prude or anything It just think our culture does a terrible job at showing that couples can have strong long lasting relationships.

3 calochortus  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 8:37:49am

So, when men objectify women it’s just boys being boys. If women objectify men society will crumble. OK.

Seriously though, this sort of analysis has been made for decades, if not centuries, and somehow people still get married (some for life, others not) families are formed and society totters onward.

4 Michael Orion Powell  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 8:52:25am

re: #3 calochortus

So, when men objectify women it’s just boys being boys. If women objectify men society will crumble. OK.

Seriously though, this sort of analysis has been made for decades, if not centuries, and somehow people still get married (some for life, others not) families are formed and society totters onward.

disinfo.com

5 Michael Orion Powell  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 8:54:14am

re: #3 calochortus

So, when men objectify women it’s just boys being boys. If women objectify men society will crumble. OK.

Seriously though, this sort of analysis has been made for decades, if not centuries, and somehow people still get married (some for life, others not) families are formed and society totters onward.

Also: disinfo.com

6 Eclectic Cyborg  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 9:30:05am

re: #4 OrionXP

Thing there is what definition of “family” are we going with? Does a single mother and her two children not constitute a family? Does there have be a father in the picture??

Also, there’s a difference between simply having a family and having a family that will provide the love, guidance and nurturing a child needs. There’s far too little of the latter in the world today.

7 Michael Orion Powell  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 9:47:28am

re: #6 dragonfire1981

Thing there is what definition of “family” are we going with? Does a single mother and her two children not constitute a family? Does there have be a father in the picture??

Having grown up for real in a single mother environment, I would say yes. If the father is living, breathing and not involved, that reflects a failure as a man on his part. The family is broken. The child is confused and lost and the mother has double the responsibility heaped on her. I really doubt that most people who glorify this upbringing actually know what it is like.

Also, there’s a difference between simply having a family and having a family that will provide the love, guidance and nurturing a child needs. There’s far too little of the latter in the world today.

I agree 100% and the hook-up culture I detailed above illustrates that.

8 Michael Orion Powell  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 9:48:44am

re: #3 calochortus

So, when men objectify women it’s just boys being boys. If women objectify men society will crumble. OK.

I don’t know where you got that. I wrote that when men didn’t, it was narcissistic and when women do it (and men do it as well because it takes two to tango), it’s narcissistic.

9 Michael Orion Powell  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 9:49:16am

re: #8 OrionXP

Sorry, I meant “when men do it,” not “when men didn’t.”

10 calochortus  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 11:28:25am

re: #4 OrionXP

I just think the “swinging singles” thing is being over-hyped right now. People still want long term relationships and dream of being married. I wonder if the number of married households declining has something to do with more young singles just not living at home. And, you have to remember that the marriages of the 1950s had a lot to do with the fact people had delayed marriage during WWII. The traditional marriages of the 50s spawned the divorces of the 70s.

re: #8 OrionXP

Yes, it is narcissistic when anyone does it. However, society has tolerated “men behaving badly” for a long time. For most of the last hundred and fifty years or so it has been explicitly the woman’s job to civilize men without having the least legal or economic power to do so. It was all about “moral influence” and withholding or bestowing sex.
I’m in my late 50s and have been hearing about the decline of society because women are forsaking their proper roles for most of those years, and yet, we’re all still here. :-)

11 EiMitch  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 6:10:35pm

Pop culture gave us the “Ozzie and Harriet” idealization of love, and people complained when it didn’t work out that way. Now, pop culture is turning against that trend, and people who naively believed “Leave it to Beaver” to be a documentary are complaining that love is dead.

Its a joke, and I’m not worried about it. Why not?

Check with old couples. The ones that met and got married during high school or college, and stayed together since, are a rarity. Most lasting couples met much later than that.

Its not a romantic thing to say, but love takes practice. Just like sex. Come to think of it, just like any other human endeavor. You’ve got to shop around. With divorce rates close to half and half, you probably wont get it right the first time.

Welcome Neo, to the real world.

12 Decatur Deb  Sun, Jun 26, 2011 6:27:35pm

Love—>Marriage—>Baby—>Daycare.

Leonard Cohen—Dance Me to the End of Love

Youtube Video


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