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1 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 12:41:02pm

Any and every pathology left untreated, escalates.

Whack jobs

2 nines09  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 12:48:30pm

And I thought "Christians" that saw Jesus in a guitar were nuts.

3 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 1:04:31pm

re: #1 researchok

Any and every pathology left untreated, escalates.

Whack jobs

re: #2 Some Assembly Required, Batteries Not Included,

And I thought "Christians" that saw Jesus in a guitar were nuts.

Same pathology, different religion. You can easily delete religion and insert one of the lunatic conspiracy theories floating around out there.

4 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 1:16:06pm

MBF says: Conservatives Liken Nuclear Summit Logo To Muslim Crescent Moon (Source)

5 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 1:52:10pm

re: #3 CuriousLurker

No truer words.

And I say that knowing you eat tomatoes.
//

6 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 1:56:54pm

re: #5 researchok

LOL, it just dawned on me why my bullshit detector was going off on this one. I'd forgotten that the tomato is a "New World" food that originated in South America and worked its way east after the Spanish conquest & colonization of the Americas.

Tomatoes didn't leave the Americas until the 16th century at the earliest. Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) died in the 7th century, so the whole thing about him appearing in a "vision" to some Palestinian woman is a big bag of #FAIL as he wouldn't know what one was if he saw it.

Not only that—regardless of how anyone feels about religion (e.g. It's a Stone Age mythology or whatever)—in an Islamic context, the notion of the Prophet appearing in visions to give advice from beyond the grave is pure invention.

7 jogiff  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:01:43pm

re: #6 CuriousLurker

Tomatoes didn't leave the Americas until the 16th century at the earliest. Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) died in the 7th century, so the whole thing about him appearing in a "vision" to some Palestinian woman is a big bag of #FAIL as he wouldn't know what one was if he saw it.

Well, presumably Muhammed has been keeping abreast of current affairs. I mean, it's not like the people who say they saw Jesus report him marveling at their food processors.

8 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:03:44pm

re: #6 CuriousLurker

Not only that—regardless of how anyone feels about religion (e.g. It's a Stone Age mythology or whatever)—in an Islamic context, the notion of the Prophet appearing in visions to give advice from beyond the grave is pure invention.

Not do fast.

I dream about pastrami, burritos and Ben and Jerry's all the time.
/

9 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:06:12pm

I should add I do not dream about wheat germ, yogurt or any food item preceded by the words 'macro biotic'.

10 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:11:14pm

re: #7 jogiff

Well, presumably Muhammed has been keeping abreast of current affairs. I mean, it's not like the people who say they saw Jesus report him marveling at their food processors.

Nope, sorry. In Islam dead is dead where the Prophet is concerned; no visitations, no advice from beyond the grave, etc. But, hey, Spencer & the rest are running with the story, so believe it if it suits you. *shrug*

11 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:12:21pm

re: #8 researchok

Not do fast.

I dream about pastrami, burritos and Ben and Jerry's all the time.
/

I dream about...cheesecake. Heh.

12 Mostly sane, most of the time.  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:22:55pm

Tomatoes? Tomatoes are not evil.

Brussels sprouts are evil. I've known this since I was five.

13 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:28:47pm

re: #12 Mostly sane, most of the time.

It's over between us.

I love Brussel Sprouts.

And asparagus.

14 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:33:46pm

re: #12 Mostly sane, most of the time.

Tomatoes? Tomatoes are not evil.

Brussels sprouts are evil. I've known this since I was five.

Everyone knows Brussels sprouts are evil.

Only Christian tomatoes with crosses in them are evil—y'know, just like halal Butterball turkeys. Ostensibly, the ones without crosses (like some of these) would be okay. //

15 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:35:20pm

re: #13 researchok

It's over between us.

I love Brussel Sprouts.

And asparagus.

Ewwww! *clutches throat, makes gagging noises*

I hate you now. //

16 sliv_the_eli  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:36:53pm

re: #14 CuriousLurker

Everyone knows Brussels sprouts are evil.

Only Christian tomatoes with crosses in them are evil—y'know, just like halal Butterball turkeys. Ostensibly, the ones without crosses (like some of these) would be okay. //

The middle one in the second row looks like a yarmulke (skullcap). Can't be having any of those Jewish tomatoes, either.

17 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:38:35pm

re: #16 sliv_the_eli

The middle one in the second row looks like a yarmulke (skullcap). Can't be having any of those Jewish tomatoes, either.

ZOMG, now we have to contend with evil Zionist tomatoes too?? *thud*

18 goddamnedfrank  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:49:37pm

re: #12 Mostly sane, most of the time.

Tomatoes? Tomatoes are not evil.

Brussels sprouts are evil. I've known this since I was five.

On topic factoid: Brussel sprouts are cruciferous vegetables, a family named after the cross shape of their four petals.

19 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:55:38pm

re: #15 CuriousLurker

Uh huh.

This from the cat lady.
//

20 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:57:13pm

re: #18 goddamnedfrank

On topic factoid: Brussel sprouts are cruciferous vegetables, a family named after the cross shape of their four petals.

Uh-oh. That's a big honking list of veggies the imaginary Salafi produce police are going to have to ban now. Damn, they're never gonna get that global Caliphate established if they keep wasting time going off on tangents like that. //

21 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:57:24pm

re: #16 sliv_the_eli

Sufi tomatoes are the ones with big creases that look like a smile.

Dervish tomatoes spin really well.

22 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 3:57:57pm

re: #21 researchok

Sufi tomatoes are the ones with big creases that look like a smile.

Dervish tomatoes spin really well.

LOL!

23 Tommy B  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:00:06pm

You'll faint! You'll scream! You'll wish they'd cut in an acceptable longitudinal manner rather than blasphemous transverse sections!

It's the...

Attack of the Crusader Tomatoes!

24 Mostly sane, most of the time.  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:00:56pm

For the record: Pico de gallo and salsa are obviously Catholic, while ketchup is Protestant. Tomato sauce would be Catholic, unless you don't add any spices, in which case it's Lutheran or something.

Spaghetti sauce was once Catholic, but is now the Esperanto of the tomato world.

25 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:05:55pm

re: #23 Tommy B

LOL, I had the same thought when I was looking at the pics of tomatoes, "Um, couldn't they just cut it in the other direction and solve the problem?"

NO! Too easy! Then no one can write a story about it.

re: #24 Mostly sane, most of the time.

ROFL, I see your imagination is as overactive as mine! ;)

26 mr.JA  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:08:00pm

As a scientist working with seed companies to get better tomatoes, I can see a market here in Muslim countries for tomatoes that do not exhibit any cross-shapes when cut in any way.
[geek mode] there are actually a couple of mutations in tomato identified that would strongly increase the nr. of locules (the chamber holding the seeds), and with 10+ locules you'd need a strong imagination to see cross-shapes. For the interested ones, paper here:
[Link: www.plantphysiol.org...]
[/geek mode]

27 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:09:53pm

Might I say I'm glad no one brought up the cucumber fatwa.

....what?

28 Ayeless in Ghazi  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:14:05pm

re: #18 goddamnedfrank

On topic factoid: Brussel sprouts are cruciferous vegetables, a family named after the cross shape of their four petals.

"It's like there's a crucifixion in my mouth and everyone's invited"

- the experience of eating sprouts.

29 sliv_the_eli  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:17:16pm

re: #17 CuriousLurker

ZOMG, now we have to contend with evil Zionist tomatoes too?? *thud*

I hear that Yassir Arafat had tomatoes in his salad the day he died. Coincidence???

30 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:17:22pm

re: #26 mr.JA

Yeah, well what about those Zionist tomatoes with the yarmulkes?? Hmm, Mr. Smarty McGeekypants? //

31 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:19:40pm

re: #29 sliv_the_eli

I hear that Yassir Arafat had tomatoes in his salad the day he died. Coincidence???

That's it! They were Killer Mossad Tomatoes and they choked him—mystery solved!

32 sliv_the_eli  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:23:46pm

re: #31 CuriousLurker

That's it! They were Killer Mossad Tomatoes and they choked him—mystery solved!

And irradiated tomatoes to boot. So you know they didn't come from Europe, becuase the EU banned those. So it can only be the U.S. or Israel. And since everyone knows the U.S. is controlled by the Israel lobby -- just ask Walt and Mearshimer -- that proves that the Mossad did it.

See? And I didn't even need a 9-month investigation of Arafat's urine-stained headscarf (BTW, how the f--- did his headscarf have blood and urine stains) to figure this one out.

//

33 Mostly sane, most of the time.  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 4:45:54pm

re: #25 CuriousLurker

An overactive imagination is fine and all until it's time to go to bed after watching Sixth Sense.

Then it sucks.

34 researchok  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 5:56:18pm

So fried green tomatoes are a Salafi plot?

35 SanFranciscoZionist  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 6:44:15pm

re: #6 CuriousLurker

LOL, it just dawned on me why my bullshit detector was going off on this one. I'd forgotten that the tomato is a "New World" food that originated in South America and worked its way east after the Spanish conquest & colonization of the Americas.

Tomatoes didn't leave the Americas until the 16th century at the earliest. Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) died in the 7th century, so the whole thing about him appearing in a "vision" to some Palestinian woman is a big bag of #FAIL as he wouldn't know what one was if he saw it.

Not only that—regardless of how anyone feels about religion (e.g. It's a Stone Age mythology or whatever)—in an Islamic context, the notion of the Prophet appearing in visions to give advice from beyond the grave is pure invention.

Well, obviously it's pure invention, but so is the notion that guardian angels will give you a wish if only you forward this message to eight of your closest friends.

Is it a hoax, or are these people just nuts? If you see the distinction.

36 SanFranciscoZionist  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 6:45:20pm

re: #27 researchok

Might I say I'm glad no one brought up the cucumber fatwa.

...what?

Hell, in Judaism, we've got people who are trying to convince everyone that strawberries and broccoli can't be kosher.

People be nuts.

37 SpaceJesus  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 9:13:54pm

lol templar tomatoes

38 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 9:19:29pm

re: #35 SanFranciscoZionist

Well, obviously it's pure invention, but so is the notion that guardian angels will give you a wish if only you forward this message to eight of your closest friends.

Is it a hoax, or are these people just nuts? If you see the distinction.

Belief in guardian angels, while perhaps not an article of faith in Christianity, does have a basis in it. Because the tomato story has zero basis in anything Islamic, it sounds to me like something a Christian (or other non-Muslim) might manufacture.

I have no doubt that there are nutty Muslims who could (and have) come up with something totally bizarre, it's just that this particular one doesn't ring true on ANY level, as I would expect it to even if it was coming from the farthest reaches of Muslim Loonistan. See the distinction?

39 CuriousLurker  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 9:35:43pm

Now that I think of of it, the first Christian tomatoes must've been conversos as the indigenous Mesoamerican ones would've been considered heathens. //

They didn't say what's supposed to happen if a Muslim eats one. Sheesh, if you're gonna make something up you really should put a little more effort & imagination into it. What a bunch of slackers.

40 calochortus  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 9:36:36pm

I wasn't aware vegetables had any religious convictions at all. Silly me.

41 dragonath  Thu, Jul 5, 2012 10:01:20pm

This just in: Starfruits are communist


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