Facebook Garbage of the Day -Jul 25
I’m too new here to have anyone be interested in my pages, so I’m using this space to post the rants I can’t post on my Facebook profile. Job searching and Facebook firestarting don’t go well together. But I need a place to post snarky responses to the things that trip my trigger.
Today’s Facebook Garbage of Today is about spanking.
I have to laugh at people who are against spanking. My parents whipped my butt and I learned the Switch Dance. I didn’t hate them. I didn’t have trust issues with them because of it. I trusted I was in big trouble when I screwed up and did things my way! I didn’t fear them. I feared getting caught doing wrong! But I sure respected them! I learned what my boundaries were, and knew what would happen if I crossed them. I wasn’t abused, I was disciplined. This is why kids nowadays have no respect for anyone…..Repost if you got your butt smacked and survived.
1. If they didn’t survive getting their butt smacked, they won’t be able to repost. Yes, it’s an extremely rare occurrence, but children do die from beatings and other punishments.
2. The problem isn’t with teaching children boundaries - it’s being in control of yours as a parent. I’m guessing that out of parents who spank their children, the percentage who have at some point over-reacted or simply spanked the child out of anger, frustration or even fear is high. My parents certainly did that and THEIR parents did much worse. Both of my parents were beaten as children, to the extent that certainly would be considered abuse. When they spanked me, they thought I should consider myself lucky that they weren’t beating me. I was spanked very rarely, because I was a very well behaved child. Did the spanking make me well behaved or was it just my nature to want to please my parents and not disappoint them. I’d say the latter, and my relationship with my parents as an adult certainly reflected that.
3. Not spanking does not = no discipline. There are many effective ways to discipline that do not have to involve spanking.
4. I have no children of my own, so I am certainly not an authority on this subject. However, for many years, I had roommates who were single mothers with young children. Only one of those women spanked her child, and he was the most out of control child who ever lived in my house. When she spanked him with the belt, he would squirm around, not to get away from her, but to hit her back. Yes, this is just anecdotal, but a child who is prone to violence only has that message of violence reinforced through spanking.
5. Best comment I have ever seen on a thread about spanking. Not attributed because I do not recall the poster’s name or handle, but I remember her comment very clearly.
You see people who were spanked growing up who spank their own children and people who were spanked but don’t spank their children. You know what you don’t see? People who were never spanked growing up but spank their own children.
This is the best evidence in my mind that suggests that spanking, even when done responsibly and in a “loving” way perpetuates violence.
My original intent was not to create an anti-spanking story, but I guess that’s what I did. My original intent was to point out that just because you yourself “survived” spanking is not a valid reason to perpetuate it.