As the dad of two boys, I was horrified by this story. I don’t know these boys or their families, but I have to seriously ask, if they have fathers, whether their fathers had ever talked to their sons about the respect they should have for the dignity and equality of women. I had a talk with my son, the high school baseball player, about all this, and about what attitudes were among other young athletes. We talked about the terrible behavior of the Steubenville boys, but also the many boys who watched and tweeted and did nothing to stop the assault. That point needed to be stressed much more than it was in the media coverage. What had the dads of those who saw all this happen — yet laughed, took pictures, and tweeted about it — had to say to their sons about respecting women?

I believe the continuing daily violence against women, by men and boys around the globe, is the most hidden and underestimated injustice in the world today. And there are at least two answers to it. First the criminal justice system must be absolutely clear and dependably harsh in its treatment of men who violate women. We have a long way to go on police and legal procedures until women can feel safe in their homes, work place, churches, and our society.

But second, we have to take responsibility as men and as fathers to speak and act against other men who behave badly toward women. The way to stop sexual assault and rape is for men to stop assaulting and raping women. And teaching respect and love for women, by fathers to their sons, is absolutely fundamental for woman to be safe.

In all these horrible situations, women generally speak out in defense of their daughters, mothers, sisters, nieces. They deal with — and push back against — the degrading abuse the male culture dishes out. But they can’t — and shouldn’t have to — do it alone.

What has been missing from this too-often repeated narrative is the condemnation of the attitudes of men or boys behaving badly from other men, especially men who are in positions of power, authority, and influence — and especially fathers.

More: Jim Wallis: Men and Boys Behaving Badly: Where Are Their Fathers?