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1 Amory Blaine  May 19, 2014 1:11:53pm

Todd Starnes > dirt

2 Bulworth  May 19, 2014 1:39:14pm

I grew up in a much simpler time - when blackberry was a pie


OFFS. Grow thefuck up please.

3 Skip Intro  May 19, 2014 1:45:24pm

Starnes is just like Rush Limbaugh. It’s always 1959 in their world.

4 team_fukit  May 19, 2014 2:00:57pm

I’ve often wondered if Starnes is a really a Southerner, seems like part of the grift.

But idk… he comes off like Lindsay Graham in a hissy-fit

5 Pie-onist Overlord  May 19, 2014 2:36:09pm
I grew up in a much simpler time - when blackberry was a pie and dirty dancing meant somebody forgot to clean out the barn for the square dance. It was a time when father still knew best - when the girls were girls and the men were men. I grew up in a time when a rainbow was a sign of God’s promise, not gay rights.

This seems familiar—it sounds like a glurge email that was being spammed around Teh Internets in the early ‘00’s and Usenet in the ‘90’s. Did Todd plagiarize it?

6 HappyWarrior  May 19, 2014 2:39:14pm

re: #2 Bulworth

I grew up in a much simpler time - when blackberry was a pie

OFFS. Grow thefuck up please.

Seriously. This is just lame even for a lamewod like Starmes. It’s one thing to have cherished memories. It’s another to completely white wash the past and act like the present is so terrible.

7 PeterWolf  May 19, 2014 3:12:09pm

And people wondered why I was so down on Starnes some time ago.

8 nines09  May 19, 2014 3:39:21pm

Make believe and rose colored glasses? No. Abject delusion.

9 palmerskiss  May 19, 2014 3:59:14pm

re: #6 HappyWarrior

Seriously. This is just lame even for a lamewod like Starmes. It’s one thing to have cherished memories. It’s another to completely white wash the past and act like the present is so terrible.

the south is still terrible, but it is a long long way from 1965.

10 palmerskiss  May 19, 2014 3:59:28pm

re: #4 team_fukit

I’ve often wondered if Starnes is a really a Southerner, seems like part of the grift.

But idk… he comes off like Lindsay Graham in a hissy-fit

i lol’d :)

11 J A P  May 19, 2014 4:37:15pm

I can’t seem to locate the date on this article on CBN, but it seems from what’s written there that he’s may not have even been born in 1965. It would put him very close to my age, which would have made him slightly too old for Sesame Street, but the perfect age for the Electric Company. In fact, he would have been a prime age to go see the movie Dirty Dancing when it was in the theaters.

I’ve heard that blackberry joke so many times it’s no longer funny… however usually it’s used to show how much progress has been made. The first time I heard it a retired programmer said that when she started programming “blackberry was a fruit.” She seemed to think progress was a good thing.

12 Pie-onist Overlord  May 19, 2014 4:44:16pm

re: #11 J A P

I can’t seem to locate the date on this article on CBN, but it seems from what’s written there that he’s may not have even been born in 1965. It would put him very close to my age, which would have made him slightly too old for Sesame Street, but the perfect age for the Electric Company. In fact, he would have been a prime age to go see the movie Dirty Dancing when it was in the theaters.

I’ve heard that blackberry joke so many times it’s no longer funny… however usually it’s used to show how much progress has been made. The first time I heard it a retired programmer said that when she started programming “blackberry was a fruit.” She seemed to think progress was a good thing.

The date is March 18, 2009.
Todd_Starnes031809. aspx

13 Pie-onist Overlord  May 19, 2014 4:48:58pm
Todd, now 41

OK he was 41 in 2009, that would make him 46. He grew up in the ‘70’s and ‘80’s when Ronald Reagan was God-Emperor of America.

Blackberries were first released in 1999 as multi-functional pagers.

14 palmerskiss  May 19, 2014 4:59:26pm

re: #13 Pie-onist Overlord

OK he was 41 in 2009, that would make him 46. He grew up in the ‘70’s and ‘80’s when Ronald Reagan was God-Emperor of America.

Blackberries were first released in 1999 as multi-functional pagers.

yes ! :D

15 team_fukit  May 19, 2014 5:13:22pm

re: #13 Pie-onist Overlord

In other words, young enough to know better than using that corny ass blackberry joke

16 ObserverArt  May 19, 2014 5:46:49pm

Simple times for simpletons.

17 Mentis Fugit  May 19, 2014 6:03:12pm

re: #15 team_fukit

In other words, young enough to know better than using that corny ass blackberry joke

My Blackberry is not working.
Youtube Video
That’s how you do “corny”.

18 Pie-onist Overlord  May 19, 2014 6:03:43pm

Also too: the movie Dirty Dancing was released in 1987, when Todd was 19. Although he probably preferred the hardcore stuff, featuring Teh Ghey Mens.

19 wheat-dogghazi  May 19, 2014 6:10:22pm

I suspect Todd Starnes was as clueless as a boy as he is now.

20 Pie-onist Overlord  May 19, 2014 6:15:14pm

re: #15 team_fukit

In other words, young enough to know better than using that corny ass blackberry joke

And I am pretty sure I have seen or heard that whole shtick before and Todd plagiarized it. It sounds very Paul Harveyish.

21 wheat-dogghazi  May 19, 2014 7:00:39pm

re: #20 Pie-onist Overlord

And I am pretty sure I have seen or heard that whole shtick before and Todd plagiarized it. It sounds very Paul Harveyish.

I ran the excerpt above through a plagiarism checker. No hits. But the sentiments contained therein are hardly original. There have been people pining for the good old days since humans developed memories.

“I grew up in a time when we used to burn sinners at the stake, after we disemboweled them first, of course! I grew up in a time when men were men, and their wives were 13-year-olds. I grew up in a time when children were sent out of the house at age 8 to work for someone else. …”

22 Bulworth  May 20, 2014 6:34:56am

J A P posted:

I’ve heard that blackberry joke so many times it’s no longer funny… however usually it’s used to show how much progress has been made. The first time I heard it a retired programmer said that when she started programming “blackberry was a fruit.” She seemed to think progress was a good thing.

There is no progress for RWNJ except to be transported back in time to a fairy tale land that never existed.


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