So many bibles around, but Freshwater doesn't seem to have read any of them past the book of Genisis.

There are more books in the bible, Mr. Freshwater. Then there's that whole Jesus thing:

0:13 And they brought young children to him, that he should touch them: and [his] disciples rebuked those that brought [them].

10:14 But when Jesus saw [it], he was much displeased, and said unto them, Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.

10:15 Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein.

10:16 And he took them up in his arms, put [his] hands upon them, and blessed them.

/I must have missed the part about Christ branding kids.