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GOP Debates Continue Tormenting Nation, Part 2

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dog philosopher ஐஒஔ௸11/22/2011 10:05:33 pm PST

what a perfect representative of the right wing republican is our newt!

he approaches every question with arrogant assurance of the unquestionable correctness of the geography of his flat earth centric universe. he has mastered the technique of arrogance-forwardness, whereby you understand with every question that the master has overlooked the annoying and pitiful ignorance that led you to trouble him with an inquiry, before the actual explanation is ever forthcoming

he is displeased and disturbed that you have chosen to question any of his innumerable pecadillos, however base, since this is a sign of ypur disturbed mind failing to notice that He Has Arrived to solve our problems

but most importantly for the republican base - very base - he beats all his competitors in the art of Making A Mean and Nasty Noise. a noise that a parent might make before mercelessly beating their child for daring to question them before strangers. a noise a slaveowner might make before ordering a slave to be flogged for the arrogance of having run away

because this is what The Base really wants. the absurd and contradictory positions, the whackdoodle theories, these are just armatures needed to hold up the rage and appear to give it shape and meaning. it’s all for naught without the furious music, the theme and variations on You Have Annoyed Or Embarrassed Me And Now You Must Pay