Comment

Tuesday Night Acoustic Guitar: Tommy Emmanuel, Train to Dusseldorf

264
HoosierHoops11/27/2013 9:24:12 am PST

Breaking from People Magazine:
The recent Las Vegas wedding between Clint Eastwood’s daughter Francesca and Jonah Hill’s brother Jordan Feldstein appears to have been a big mistake.
“It was a goof off,” a family source tells PEOPLE, adding that the marriage is in the process of being annulled.

Dear Diary:
Day one: I had no idea our trip to Vegas would be so much fun! After a booze filled sex bender Jordan and I headed from LA to Vegas in his Million dollar King Air. We made a little side trip to an unnamed landing strip just outside of Cleveland, Ohio. But it was worth it. Don’t tell daddy but the sex was so much better that night.
Day two: We checked into the Bellagio. I wanted to skinny dip in the water as it sprayed towards the heavens but Jordan convinced me to just flash my tits to the Wine Captain. Gosh..The sex is really good with what’s his face..
I forgot his name and so will you by the weekend. It’s hot being Clint Eastwood’s Baby girl. I hardly have to use his American Express Card.
Day Three: The booze/Drug fueled week is going great. We celebrated Thanksgiving this morning by sharing a bottle of Wild Turkey 101. Room service brought up yummy eggs and a Hooker. What’s his fucking name is a riot! Getting a little fuzzy today so we called the King Air from Miami for a little..If you know what I mean. Lucky I have Daddy’s American Express cause this could get expensive. I’ve almost memorized the 16 numbers on the card..I Don’t understand the expiration date on Daddy’s card.
This is America Right?
Day Four: The Booze filled sex is starting to get old..It was great from day one then the 5 minute grunt and squirt is getting old. I need another drink..
Day five: Daddy called..
Hi Daddy! What? Where? When? Jonah is great Daddy.. I mean Jordan..
Who is your Million dollar baby daddy? Who is your your million dollar baby? Say it Daddy..No..Don’t spell it..Say it..
You can’t say my name? oh.. You missed the e.. I’m pretty sure my name has an e in it daddy..No..I’m pretty sure.. Are you talking to the chair again? Stop talking to the chair..
Day six.. Home at last! After a short hop to Columbia we finally arrived in LA. This was the best goof off I’ve had since I was 16 running through the house yelling ‘I love Rawhide!’ Daddy would smile and keep watching Westerns on TV. He never really got it.
Day Seven: I’m really sleepy and hung over.