It was totally insane. The baggage claim is in Terminal 2 and our flight was out of Terminal 1. I had to trudge miles and miles (no wheelchair pushers) to the baggage claim and when I got there they told me “Door 27!”

So I went to Door 27 and it’s LOCKED. “Pick up the courtesy phone” and of course no one answers. After about 10 minutes of ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing someone answers and screams WAIT THERE and then 10 minutes later somebody opens the door, lets me in AND WALKS AWAY.

So inside this restricted area I trudge more miles and miles down to the very end of the terminal and there is a room full of baggage. I go into this room and they yell at me GO TO THE FRONT DESK. But there is nobody at the front desk.

I wait there anyway and finally somebody from the baggage room decides to go through the swinging door to the front desk. I present my claim ticket and they take me back to the room I was just in and tell me to locate me bag.

It’s RIGHT THERE where it probably was for two whole fucking days.

So I grabbed the bag and ran out of there and trudged through endless miles until I got to Terminal 1 and then I got myself a beer.