re: #428 suchislife

I don’t think you read what he wrote very carefully. I especially think this rush to judgement of him based on part one of three is misguided.

In his case, he’s saying he would have snapped if he felt his mother ever gave up on him. He doesn’t say that if they don’t heal, it’s because you didn’t love them enough. He fully acknowledges how hard it is to love a kid like that. What he’s saying is that from his personal experience, his read on what triggered her was the attempt to commit him, and the reason for the target was a displacement— the kids who got what he felt he deserved. He’s not defending this, he’s not even saying that she was wrong to seek his commitment. He said this:

Children like me will look for reasons to ignore love, especially if we feel the people who love us are also hurting us.

So obviously he’s not saying that she didn’t love him enough, but that in Adam’s state, he ignored the love because he was seeking to ignore it.

As a thought experiment, assume that the writer is not being manipulative, but sincere. Assume that he’s giving an honest recounting of what his mental state was. how should he have worded this differently? What advice could he give, if he honestly thinks that he would have snapped if he felt his mother had given up on him, other than to do your best to not let your kid think that you’ve given up on them?

I also find it pretty telling how much he emphasizes that all his troubles as a teenager were just a consequence of being so extremely smart; “look at me, I can do math in my head! Now do you get why I’m acting like an asshole, stupid ordinary person?”

Where does the author speak about his own intelligence at all? I read the story twice and can’t find it. If you really just made that up, then you really, really need to rethink your take on this, don’t you agree?