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Gun-Crazy Right Wing Howls for Bob Costas to Be Fired

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Killgore Trout12/03/2012 6:17:24 pm PST

My house alarm system is almost completely installed. Possibly the best $1,000 bucks I’ve spent in a very long time. The cats make a lot of noise at night scratching on boxes and chasing pistachios across the floor. I’ve become used to sleeping through the racket but I no longer have to worry if there’s a burglar dance party in the living room or a cat working out frustrations on cardboard. I think I’m going to make the additional investment to have the backyard professionally wired with motion sensors.