Comment

Changelog: On Torture

593
Mad Prophet Ludwig11/04/2010 5:19:05 pm PDT

I think we should be asking some real questions Glen Beck and Fox style:

I’m just asking important questions…

How else could Sarah have reached prominece without the madness incurring malevolence of the old ones?

Isn’t it interesting that I am the only one asking this?

You won’t see it asked on the “mainstream” media will you?

Some say that Sarah Palin opened the Necromomicon, learned forbidden knowledge and got a hickey from the madness of the old gods. Some say she is the love slave of Hastur. Others say that she got those breast implants to please the King in Yellow. Others say she spreads her legs for the dark and bloodstained affections of Cthulu cultists in a frenzied attempt to wake the old god from his death like slumber in the sunken city of R’lyeh.
Did you notice that Sarah Palin is in league with the tea parties and we all know that the Boston Tea party took place in a New England bay - just like the one near Arkham where the deep ones dwell? Coincidence? Maybe, but look at the pattern!

And what about her cult? Need I say more?

It is certainly true that when she makes speeches, people are either driven into the cult to madly gibber the thoughts of eldrich horror, or are simply rendered insane. Her warbling could well have been learned from the forbidden tongues of the deep ones. However, whether she learned to induce madness from the aftershocks of fellatiating the gibbering appendages of a shoggoth or the orgies of the deep ones is of no matter. The evil effect of her words, the madness and broken souls left in her wake, and the unspeakable horrors she creates are clear.

She is obviously the tool of long hidden and malevolent forces which are beyond the imagination of our limited human minds. She has tasted the madness and ecstasy of Kadath and gone over the blasted plains of Leng.
Look at the effect her presence has had on the entire GOP. Soul rending and twisted glimpses into the dark vistas of the cruel and uncaring multiverse that rend a man’s spirit apart and reduce his mind to twisted fragments of broken sanity are the only logical explanation for her power and popularity.

Only one who believed in the utter insignificance of humanity in the face of the Old Ones could be so callous to the poor. Why help them if they are all food for Cthulu anyway? Only one with hidden knowledge knows how the old ones feed on human madness and misery - why else try so hard to spread such madness and misery?

Surely she realizes this when she lays down in the stone circle for some affection from the unspeakable Yog-Sothath. One quickie with the old ones, under the right alignment of the stars, accompanied by some romantic cultic chanting and her mission is made all the more “clear” to her twisted mind.

Did you ever notice that she never wears short sleeves - could it be to hide the runic tattoos copied from the Necronomicon? What of her glazed and distant stare? Could it be that her broken mind clearly wanders onto the unspeakable delights of getting face from an abomination with one hundred mouths and six foot tongues?

Isn’t that interesting?