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Iowahawk Interviews Bereaved Housefly

Sat, Jun 20, 2009 at 12:58 pm PDT

Widow of Murdered Fly Seeks White House Apology, ----. WASHINGTON — The widow of the housefly murdered by Barack Obama during a recent CNBC television interview announced this morning that she would be filing a wrongful death suit against the President in federal district court. The plaintiff brief — ...

Iowahawk, Humor, Barack Obama, Fly

Iowahawk: The 2012 Pelosi GTxi

Fri, Jun 5, 2009 at 5:30 pm PDT

Instantly classic video blogging from the Hawk del Iowa. [Video]

Economy, Budget, Nancy Pelosi, Congress, Auto Industry, Humor, Iowahawk

The Iowahawk Council of Automotive Advisors

Thu, Apr 9, 2009 at 1:08 pm PDT

It’s obvious, really. The one man who can save America’s comatose auto industry courageously steps forward: iowahawk: The Iowahawk Council of Automotive Advisors. When it comes to naming a savior for the American car biz, I think we can do better. And by “we,” I of course mean “me.” ...

Iowahawk, Humor, Auto Industry

Iowahawk: Requiem For a Lightweight

Tue, Mar 24, 2009 at 3:10 pm PDT

Iowahawk tells the sad story of the punch-drunk palooka of Pennsylvania Avenue: Requiem For a Lightweight. (With apologies to Rod Serling) ACT 1 SCENE 1 A stark dressing room in the underbelly of the White House, bathed in the dim yellow light of a 25-watt compact fluorescent bulb. The ...

Iowahawk, Barack Obama, Humor, Rod Serling

Iowahawk: Time To Deal With the Mutineers Aboard the S.S. Conservatism

Sat, Mar 7, 2009 at 9:00 am PST

At Iowahawk, it’s the return of cherished conservative columnist/yachtsman T. Coddington Van Voorhees VII: I Daresay It Is Time We Deal With the Mutineers Aboard the S.S. Conservatism. Much has been written about the fate of the conservative movement in the months since last I corresponded with you. I ...

Iowahawk, conservatism, Humor

Iowahawk: Largest Number Discovered

Wed, Feb 11, 2009 at 5:12 pm PST

Iowahawk has exclusive details on an incredible scientific discovery. PALO ALTO, CA - An international mathematics research team announced today that they had discovered a new integer that surpasses any previously known value “by a totally mindblowing sh-tload.” Project director Yujin Xiao of Stanford University said the theoretical number, ...

Iowahawk, Economy, Stimulus, Humor

Iowahawk: A Message from Waxulon-6

Sun, Jan 18, 2009 at 10:18 am PST

Lord High Admiral Waxulon-6, inhabiting the body of Congressman Henry Waxman, has a message for all Earth creatures: Mark Your Time, Hu-Mans! Attention Hu-Mans: Mark your time! Behold the current heat readings of your atmosphere, which have now reached less than negative 40 in your Earth-degrees. Phase I of ...

Iowahawk, Henry Waxman, Humor, Climate Change, Global Warming

Ripping off the Hawk

Wed, Dec 24, 2008 at 5:51 pm PST

What’s this I hear about people ripping off Iowahawk’s goods? The Pelosi GTxi SS/RT, Take 2. Maybe they need to have a discussion with the business end of Stinky Beaumont’s wrench.

Iowahawk, Plagiarism, Copyright, Internet

Iowahawk: SantaCorp Pleads Case For Bailout

Fri, Dec 19, 2008 at 5:00 pm PST

Terrible news from the North Pole, to add to the nation’s economic woes: SantaCorp Pleads Case For Bailout. WASHINGTON - Flanked by officials from the United Elf Toytinkerers union, SantaCorp CEO Kris Kringle today told the House Ways and Means Committee that without immediate government financial help, his firm ...

Iowahawk, Economy, Christmas, Santa Claus, Humor

Iowahawk: Feds Seize Blago Ebay Account

Wed, Dec 10, 2008 at 7:48 pm PST

Yes, it’s come down to this. Iowahawk has the ugly details, with screenshots: BREAKING: Feds Seize Blagojevich eBay Account.

Illinois, Blagojevich, Democrats, Politics, Corruption, Iowahawk, Humor

Iowahawk: Apologetic Mumbai Killers

Tue, Dec 2, 2008 at 5:20 pm PST

A darkly humorous Iowahawk piece: Apologetic Mumbai Killers: ‘We Didn’t Get the Memo About Obama’. MUMBAI - Ajmal Amir Kasab, the sole surviving member of the 10-man team of Pakistani gunmen that left hundreds dead or wounded after a bloody three day rampage in Mumbai, today blamed the mayhem ...

Iowahawk, Barack Obama, Mumbai, Terrorism, Humor

Iowahawk: A Note to the Hoi Polloi

Thu, Oct 30, 2008 at 2:20 pm PDT

This is why I call the dreaded Iowahawk “some kinda damn genius:” As a Conservative, I Must Say I Do Quite Like the Cut of this Obama Fellow’s Jib. When my late father T. Coddington Van Voorhees VI founded the iconoclastic conservative journal National Topsider in 1948, he famously ...

Iowahawk, Barack Obama, Christopher Buckley, Humor, Teh Funny

Iowahawk on the Abuse of Statistics

Tue, Oct 28, 2008 at 4:05 pm PDT

Iowahawk crunches some numbers, does the math, and decides it’s all about Balls and Urns.

Iowahawk, Statistics, Polls, Politics

Iowahawk: I Am Bill

Fri, Oct 24, 2008 at 4:27 pm PDT

Iowahawk serves up another slice of righteous populist polemic, from a somewhat different angle: I AM BILL. Every time I turn on the internet these days, it seems like another right wing blogger is digging up more baloney on Professor Bill Ayers. Apparently these people would rather talk about ...

Iowahawk, bill ayers, william ayers, Weather Underground

Iowahawk: I Am Joe

Sat, Oct 18, 2008 at 9:19 am PDT

The Hawk gets serious: I Am Joe. I hope you will join me in expressing a simple bit of solidarity with this guy, Spartacus style. I AM JOE. I am a Wal Mart schlub in flyover country who changes my own oil and unclogs drains without a license. I ...

Iowahawk, Barack Obama, Media Bias, Joe the Plumber

Iowahawk: A Reason to Vote for Obama

Wed, Oct 15, 2008 at 4:55 pm PDT

A special guest commentary at Iowahawk’s pad, featuring two hate-blinded leftists wearing obscene T-shirts, with a very good reason to consider voting for Barack Obama: A Vote For Obama is a Vote For Civility. Think about it. With Barack Obama in office, *ssholes like us will fade into a ...

Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Barack Obama, Leftists, Progressives

Iowahawk: ACORN Files Voting Rights Suit on Behalf of Imaginary-Americans

Thu, Oct 9, 2008 at 2:33 pm PDT

Breaking from the Iowahawk News Cartel: ACORN Files Voting Rights Suit on Behalf of Imaginary-Americans. ST. LOUIS - Attorneys for the voting registration organizations ACORN and Project Vote filed an anti-discrimination voting rights suit in the U.S. Federal District court this morning, alleging the United States government is involved ...

Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Barack Obama, Acorn

Iowahawk: It Takes a Village of the Damned

Wed, Oct 8, 2008 at 12:10 pm PDT

Admit it — you thought about this movie too when you saw the video of the creepy Obama kids. [Video]

Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Barack Obama, Video

Iowahawk: Hey Barack!

Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 8:54 am PDT

In a world exclusive, Iowahawk has somehow landed a video interview with the brains behind the Barack Obama phenomenon. [Video]

Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Barack Obama, Video

Iowahawk: Council Demands Palin Ouster from Fallout Shelter

Mon, Sep 22, 2008 at 5:43 pm PDT

Sometimes the hawk’s talons are sharp, like razors: Council Demands Palin Ouster from Fallout Shelter. Newark, Blast Ring 4: Radioactive mutants from the National Jewish Democratic Council today tapped an angry Morse code press release message on the lid of the fallout shelter of another Jewish organization, demanding that ...

Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Sarah Palin

Iowahawk: Clockwork O-Rage

Sun, Sep 21, 2008 at 9:11 pm PDT

Viddy well, oh my brothers: Clockwork O-Rage as Obama Urges Supporters to Stomp Home Message of Hope. LAS VEGAS, NV — Barack Obama stepped up his attacks on Republican rival John McCain today during a campaign stop in Nevada, telling supporters to “get in the faces” of waivering voters ...

Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Barack Obama

Iowahawk: The Idiossey

Sun, Aug 31, 2008 at 9:28 am PDT

An appropriately Greek treatment of the epic saga of Obamacles: The Idiossey. Book the First: A question for the Muse Speak to me, O Muse, of this resourceful man who strides so boldly upon the golden shrine at Invescos, Between Ionic plywood columns, to the kleig light altar. Fair ...

LGF, Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Barack Obama, Odyssey, Idiossey

Iowahawk: The 'Q' is for 'Quality'

Fri, Jul 11, 2008 at 9:21 am PDT

The dreaded Iowahawk has uncovered Al Qaeda’s new plan for world domination—which includes a branding makeover and new corporate logo: The ‘Q’ is for ‘Quality’. A Message from the Director Ayman al Zawahiri Director of Change Management Al Qaeda Industries Worldwide, Inc. Hello, valued Al Qaeda associate! Welcome to ...

LGF, Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Al Qaeda

Iowahawk to Redouble Campaign Efforts, Maybe

Sat, Jun 7, 2008 at 2:47 pm PDT

We shouldn’t forget that there is still a third candidate in this presidential race: iowahawk: And Then There Were Three. “Hey stupid,” I am often asked, “what happened to your presidential campaign?” For your information Mr. / Ms.Smarty Pants, instead of bombarding you with attack ads and TV spin ...

LGF, Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Election 2008

Iowahawk: Dear Barry

Sun, May 25, 2008 at 3:16 pm PDT

At Iowahawk’s pad, more problem-solving tips from America’s premier relationship expert: Dear Barry. Dear Barry: I try to get along with the people in my neighborhood, but sometimes it can be difficult. Take for example my neighbor “Mahmoud.” Last weekend while I was seeding my lawn, he drove back ...

LGF, Iowahawk, Parody, Humor, Barack Obama, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Satire

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