Even by Sarah Palin’s already low standards, this speech is extraordinarily incoherent and scattered. I’ve seen a lot of her speeches (do not pity me, it is my job), and I can’t remember a more garbled, deeply weird performance from Caribou Barbie.
Sarah Palin has a rather spectacular word salad for us today at Facebook, ranting at one of the right’s perennial targets, PETA, after they criticized her for posting a photo of her son standing on the family dog to wash dishes. In a standard what-about deflection maneuver, she brings up, yes, the hackneyed right wing joke known as OBAMA ATE DOG because the story involves dogs. Never fails to make ‘em chortle and guffaw.
Chill. At least Trig didn’t eat the dog.
Hey, by the way, remember your “Woman of the Year”, Ellen DeGeneres? Did you get all wee-wee’d up when she posted this sweet picture? conservatives4palin.com Hypocritical, much?
Did you go as crazy when your heroic Man-of-Your-Lifetime, Barack Obama, revealed he actually enjoyed eating dead dog meat?
Aren’t you the double-standard radicals always opposing Alaska’s Iditarod - the Last Great Race honoring dogs who are born to run in wide open spaces, while some of your pets “thrive” in a concrete jungle where they’re allowed outdoors to breathe and pee maybe once a day?
Aren’t you the same anti-beef screamers blogging hate from your comfy leather office chairs, wrapped in your fashionable leather belts above your kickin’ new leather pumps you bought because your celebrity idols (who sport fur and crocodile purses) grinned in a tabloid wearing the exact same Louboutins exiting sleek cowhide covered limo seats on their way to some liberal fundraiser shindig at some sushi bar that features poor dead smelly roe (that I used to strip from our Bristol Bay-caught fish, and in a Dillingham cannery I packed those castoff fish eggs for you while laughing with co-workers about the suckers paying absurdly high prices to party with the throw away parts of our wild seafood)? I believe you call those discarded funky eggs “caviar”.
That last paragraph is a doozy. Like William Burroughs on hillbilly heroin.
Here’s that last paragraph in beat poem format. Imagine it being read poetry club style.
a thing by Sarah
blogging hate from comfy leather office chairs,
wrapped in fashionable leather belts
above your kickin’ new leather pumps
you bought because your celebrity idols
(who sport fur and crocodile purses)
grinned in a tabloid
wearing the exact same Louboutins
exiting sleek cowhide covered limo seats
on their way
to some liberal fundraiser shindig
at some sushi bar
that features poor dead smelly roe
(that I used to strip from our Bristol Bay-caught fish,
and in a Dillingham cannery
I packed those castoff fish eggs for you
while laughing with co-workers
about the suckers
paying absurdly high prices
to party with
the throw away parts of our wild seafood)?
you call those
Sarah Palin’s latest word salad is even more incoherent and ranty than usual — a monumental wall of authentic wingnut gibberish. That nasty Obama guy is oppressing her again by suggesting women should have access to cheaper, better day care.
(Do I even have to tell you that the Obama quote that launched her into this confused tirade is completely out of context and deceptive?)
Obama Declares Stay-at-Home Moms Aren’t Worth a Hill of Beans; Says It’s a Choice ‘We Don’t Want Americans to Make’
Well that just takes the cake. Sure, Obama’s latest shot across the bow in his own “War on Women” is easily deflected by women like my friends and me testifying to the most precious, irreplaceable seasons of our lives when we were BLESSED to be “stay-at-home moms” (though I don’t remember any of us actually “staying home” in those busiest times of our children’s lives), but Friday’s jab deserves something right back nonetheless. On behalf of former and current stay-at-homers, including my girlfriends who still get together to bake cookies for the bake sale (see photos in my kitchen above), and volunteer to coach kids ball teams, and man the church’s food bank, and entertain latchkey kids, and all that other obnoxiously “housewifey” stuff, the President needs to be spanked.
Barack, do you not know any stay-at-home moms? Are you and Michelle so disconnected from the real world that you think women will accept your intolerant view that we should not have a choice in how we wish to live our lives? You have a way of arrogantly demanding that we fall in line with your sad opinion of today’s American woman. It seems you’d shackle us by your snobbish shunning of one traditional lifestyle choice while taking advantage of power to manifest your liberal view by manipulating public opinion and resources to diminish moms who put career on hold to raise a family. You are really messed up. And you’re so 1960’s.
Yes, the 60’s are calling and they want their ardent yet narrow sexist confines back. See, you just set the women’s movement back a few decades, and I think it’s hilarious because for being the smartest man in the room, you ain’t too smart.
Whoa, Nellie! Caribou Barbie’s on a tear! And it continues in this vein of rich idiocy for five more interminable paragraphs.
Thanks, John McCain.
The half-governor is ranting about impeachment again, and today she demands that the Washington Post get on board the Impeachment Express, just like they did in the good old days with Richard Nixon, or risk being “a bunch of wusses.”
Of course, if Palin had been around when Nixon was President, she would have been totally on his side, denouncing the “lamestream media” for persecuting this hero of conservatism. But let’s just gloss over that inconvenient appetizer, and get right to the word salad main course.
The list of Obama abuses and impeachable offenses is long. I challenge you to lift a finger and help protect democracy, allow justice for all, and ensure domestic tranquility by doing your job reporting current corrupt events fairly. If not, you prove yourselves incompetent and in bed with Obama, not caring one iota about media integrity.
Those running the Washington Post’s show now, compared to those during the Nixon era, are too afraid of being uninvited to the permanent political class’ cocktail parties and petty gossip fests, making you all a bunch of wusses. I challenge you to get to work.
- Sarah Palin
Hang on to your tricorne hat and pantaloons, because it’s time for another EXCLUSIVE BREAKING BOMBSHELL word salad from the half-wit half-governor, brought to you by the crazed heirs of Andrew Breitbart: EXCLUSIVE—SARAH PALIN: ‘IT’S TIME TO IMPEACH’ PRESIDENT OBAMA.
President Obama’s rewarding of lawlessness, including his own, is the foundational problem here. It’s not going to get better, and in fact irreparable harm can be done in this lame-duck term as he continues to make up his own laws as he goes along, and, mark my words, will next meddle in the U.S. Court System with appointments that will forever change the basic interpretation of our Constitution’s role in protecting our rights.
It’s time to impeach; and on behalf of American workers and legal immigrants of all backgrounds, we should vehemently oppose any politician on the left or right who would hesitate in voting for articles of impeachment.
The many impeachable offenses of Barack Obama can no longer be ignored. If after all this he’s not impeachable, then no one is.
You said it, Sarah.
And take a wild guess what’s going on in the comment section.
Palin, it is a little late for impeachment. He needs to be arrested and placed in solitary confinement for the rest of his pathetic life.
MILITARY COUP FOR OBAMA AND CONGRESS
We loathe your gay existence, Soetoro
After the Communist Child-in-Chief is finished destroying as much of this nation as he can… We are going to need someone with true intelligence, good judgement, and who knows how to clean up behind messy children!
In Other Words… America Needs Sarah Palin as our Next President!!!
Only if “to impeach” means “to permanently separate the head from the body”.
Once he’s useless to them they will kill him and try to blame us!
It IS WAYYY PAST IMPEACHMENT TIME AND WAYYY MORE LIKE…. TREASON TRIAL! GFY BATHHOUSE BARRY!
Well I agree that the kenyan should be impeached. He should have been impeached a long time ago, but for the most glaring, obvious, elephant in the room, because he is not constitutionally eligible to be president in the first place. He’s a fraud, and his rightful place is prison.
The time for impeachment is LONG over due. This is more. This is worse. This is TREASON. The individual in the White House needs to be arrested, tried, convicted, and hung from the neck until dead when found guilty. He is evil. Stop him before he finds reason to declare martial law and turn this Republic into an Empire or Kingdom and remove all legal recourse. If we wait, I will see some of you in the internment camp on the way to the showers….
On and on it goes, more than 4000 comments like these boiling with hatred, racism and conspiracy theories. Also known as the Breitbart “News” business model.
All over the right wing universe, rage is the order of the day. I know, you’re asking, “What do you mean, Charles? Aren’t they always raging?”
Well, yes, but this particular ragefest has an extra ingredient: confusion and a dim sense of betrayal at Thad Cochran’s Mississippi primary win. Yes, Thad Cochran, a first class reactionary caveman in every way, is now not conservative enough for them.
And the idiot half-governor who nearly became Vice President is leading the marching morons down this confused and angry road, serving up another of her trademark incoherent word salads. It makes no sense, but it doesn’t have to; it’s the inchoate scream of terrified rage that’s important.
“Well, you know, as for the primary, and perhaps if it’s true, some shenanigans going on there, nothing should surprise you, but that’s old-school politics where it’s a bit of the status quo and that’s got to go.”
“It’s very rare in a Republican primary that the candidate who promises to bring home the bacon, promising bigger government, which is requiring higher taxes and more burdensome government actually pulls it off in the primary? That’s a rare thing,” Palin said. “So it’s — it will be surprising, and yet perhaps not, to find out what that cross-over of Democrat voters, how that does impact the general.”
“Well, if Republicans are going to act like Democrats, then what’s the use in getting all gung ho about getting Republicans in there?” Palin said. “So yeah, if Republicans aren’t going to stand strong on the planks in our platform, then it does no good to get all enthused about them anymore.”
Well, the Republican talking points on the release of Sgt. Bergdahl have obviously gone out; the entire right wing universe is now screaming in unison (as usual), and Sarah Palin joins the chorus with one of her trademark hateful word salads:
Commander-in-Chief’s Definition of “Honorable Service” Includes Anti-American Actions While in Uniform; He Just Destroyed Troop Morale
The Obama administration tells America this soldier served “with honor and distinction.” (weeklystandard.com)
No, Mr. President, a soldier expressing horrid anti-American beliefs - even boldly putting them in writing and unabashedly firing off his messages (nypost.com) while in uniform, just three days before he left his unit on foot - is not “honorable service.” Unless that is your standard.
Please use your White House Rose Garden to praise the truly honorable service of our good U.S. troops who were killed in their search for Sgt. Bergdahl (thedailybeast.com). Praise the soldiers who fought with everything they had to defeat Islamic terrorists, those whom you just freed from prison. Our men gave all. Our surviving combat vets will forever live with the effects of the missions they willingly engaged in to protect you, our country, and certainly their brothers and sisters who are proud to wear the uniform.
You blew it again, Barack Obama, by negotiating away any leverage against the bad guys as these bad guys - Osama Bin Laden’s partners in evil crime - joyfully celebrate their “win” in the deal you sealed.
- Sarah Palin
Notice how she parrots one of the now-standard talking points about the soldiers “who were killed in their search.”
Six US soldiers died in the search for Sgt. Bergdahl, and that’s a tragedy. But how many American soldiers died searching for nonexistent weapons of mass destruction, sent to their deaths for a lie?
These people are despicable.
Classy as always, today half-governor Sarah Palin decided to use Chelsea Clinton’s pregnancy to attack Hillary Clinton, in another of her trademark incoherent word salads: Sarah Palin: Hillary Clinton Should ‘Open Her Eyes’.
“She, just knowing that her daughter Chelsea is pregnant with a baby — it’s a real baby! It’s not some disposable something, and I know that will be controversial. But those who, perhaps, they’re in this position now as a parent or a grandparent, they realize sanctity of life, how innocent, how precious it is. And of all places it should be in the womb that these babies are protected. So maybe even on a social issue like that she’ll open her eyes.”
Yes, of all places it should be in the womb that babies are protected — because after they emerge, the Sarah Palins of the world couldn’t possibly care less about them.
Ladies and gentlemen, the political genius of 23-year old Suey Park: #CancelColbert Activist Suey Park: “This Is Not Reform, This Is Revolution”.
What is the best way to work with white people, to get them on our side?
I don’t want them on our side.
You don’t want them on your side.
This is not reform, this is revolution.
So what do you want to see happen in your revolution?
I mean, it’s already happening I think. The revolution will not be an apocalypse, it’s gonna be a series of shifts in consciousness that result in actions that come about, and I think that like, at this point is really like, ride or die, in terms who’s in and who is out. I don’t play by appeasement politics, it is not about getting my oppressors to humanize me. And in that sense I reject the respectability politics, I reject being tone-policed, I think we need to do away with this idea that these structures are … that the prisons can undergo reform and somehow do less violence as a structure. But any example like that.
Wait, can you ask that question again, I got distracted real quick, there was a bird outside my window.
Before you haters start laughing, I’d just like to point out that Che Guevara was also easily distracted by cute birds.
OK, maybe not.
[Live event concluded.]