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Have you ever wondered what it would sound like if Donald Trump read a speech from a teleprompter? Well, wonder no more! Because in today’s “foreign policy” speech he showed us exactly what it’s like: slow, halting, and painfully stilted.

I’m using scare quotes around “foreign policy” because it was really just a rehash of the same old xenophobic right wing idiocy he’s been spouting on the campaign trail, right down to the hackneyed wingnut claim that Obama “bows to our enemies” and can’t win because he refuses to use the magic words “radical Islamic terrorism.”

I especially enjoyed the part where he said we need “allies in the Muslim world” to help us fight terrorism, then turned right around and repeated his call for a total ban on Muslims entering the US.

“We’re in a war against radical Islam, but President Obama won’t even name the enemy!…Hillary Clinton also refuses to say the words ‘radical Islam,’ even as she pushes for a massive increase in refugees coming into our country….

“Containing the spread of radical Islam must be a major foreign policy goal of the United States and indeed the world. Events may require the use of military force. But it’s also a philosophical struggle…

“In this we’re going to be working very closely with our allies in the Muslim world, all of which are at risk from radical Islamic violence, attacks, and anything else….

“The struggle against radical Islam also takes place in our homeland. There are scores of recent migrants inside our borders charged with terrorism….We must stop importing extremism through senseless immigration policies….A pause for reassessment will help us to prevent the next San Bernardino or. frankly, much worse — all you have to do is look at the World Trade Center and September 11th….”

But don’t worry, he’ll be the strongest, smartest, most militaristic president ever, and he has a secret plan for defeating ISIS in a matter of days.

“And then there’s ISIS. I have a simple message for them. Their days are numbered. I won’t tell them where and I won’t tell them how….But they’re going to be gone.”

Other highlights of the speech include bashing America’s allies for “not paying their fair share” then saying he’d make America a more trustworthy and respected ally, and saying Obama has “no coherent foreign policy” while claiming he’d be much better because he’d be totally unpredictable.

And of course, the instant classic moment where he showed he doesn’t even know how to pronounce “Tanzania.”

In short, it was the same pathetically familiar rambling, random nonsense from a man who’s simply making it up as he goes, repeating what he thinks his far right cultish followers want to hear.