I wish I could post the photo of the letter here but it is too big (560kb), so instead you will have to settle for a link and a typed reproduction by me.

Ancient behaviour

Homosexuality, including same-sex marriage, is not an enlightened idea. The Romans practised homosexuality. Surely, after 2000 years, our level of intelligence should have evolved somewhat, so that we can truly pride ourselves of being cleverer than our forebears.
If homosexuality spreads, it can cause human evolution to come to a standstill. It could threaten the human position on the evolutionary ladder, and say, ducks, could take over the world. Ducks always nest in pairs and if we allow same-sex marriage, then ducks will have evolved further than we have. We will be in danger of all being equal, with ducks more equal than us.
We should learn from history and not be stuck with copying ancient behaviour. The government has no right to bring us back to the stone age. I don’t want my children to have to compete with ducks. I want them to evolve further than I have. Any self-respecting human would aim for that too.
None of this really bears any weight for me, because I do not believe in evolution. However, the powers that be believe in evolution, and have made many decisions based on it. They should be consistent: If you believe in evolution, you can’t be in favour of homosexuality, or the ducks will get you in the end.
Jasmin [redacted], aged 14,
Homeschooled, Scargill

I always heard that it was the cockroaches that were going to take over after we’re gone, I never even thought about evolved ducks taking over. You can be sure that I’ll be keeping a much closer eye on the local ducks from now on, just in case they start stockpiling weapons for the Duck Revolution.

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