re: #8 Charles

But now I’m wondering who could possibly be on the other end of Obama’s Blackberry. Could it be … David Hasselhof?

Or maybe … Satan?

Mebst! It is now time to reveal the sad case of failed agent Beck:

In June of 2006, a group of junior Zionist Occupation agents took a saucer from the Yeshiva and decided to find a washed out hollywood wannabe. They realized that such an individual would do essentially anything to make it big.

They found Beck, weeping outside of a comedy bar.

After bringing him to the saucer with a promise of a bag of cheetos, (yes really, that was all it took) Beck responded abnormally to the probe procedure.

It is well known that one in five humans kind of likes the probe. However, alas, Beck decided he craved the probe.

Unfortunately, he got loose from his cell and probed himself when no one was watching. In the course of thinking that probing his ear would be “groovy and spacey” he managed to implant a small radio transceiver in hi auditory nerve. The transceiver is wetware and programmed to play Mexican radio, Rush Limbaugh and the Bircher feed.

Alas, he thinks these are his own thoughts.

We could repair him. However, we have discovered that he fits into our greater agenda of discrediting the right so that Agent Obama can take over your most powerful nation with his secret army of mutant Stalinist cub scouts.