re: #10 LudwigVanQuixote

It sounds as if you are writing about a sort of feminine Stockholm syndrome when you are talking about those who have internalized the message.

That’s essentially what it is. That’s why the consciousness raising groups of the 70’s and the mantra ‘the personal is political’ were so crucial, and in fact women exchanging their experiences with other women continues to be crucial. There are some things you don’t see, can’t see, when you’re enmeshed in the system. Example: it might not occur to a girl to question why her family has a curfew for her, but not her brother. Or why he’s encouraged to go to college, but she is not. Or why she and her mother are expected to take care of elderly relatives, but the men in her family are not.
Those are just crude example, but you get the drift.

As for women who hate other women, actively hate them, some of that has to do with despising themselves. It’s like the abused child who grows up to be an abusive parent. They identify with the power and despise ‘weakness’. Being victimised makes you ‘the weak one’— so you victimise others yourself, over and over again, because it ‘proves’ you aren’t like them— you’re not a victim. How can you be, if you’re victimising others? (such people are always victims themselves but this is their thinking).

Phyllis Chesler has an excellent book called Women’s Inhumanity to Women which is about all this— women hating on women, the myth of sisterhood.

And on the subject of the internet: stalking statistics show that women are 99% (or similar) the victims of stalking. The perpetrators tend to be overwhelmingly male.

But when you enter the internet into the equation, that suddenly changes. The gender of the victims doesn’t change— but the number of female perpetrators leaps, from under 5 percent to around 24 percent.

The internet is perfectly suited to female aggression. Women aren’t allowed or encouraged to be angry in our society, and for various reasons, lack of physical strength being one of them, women seek indirect and covert means of expressing aggression.

So the internet is perfect for them. Nasty anonymous emails, anonymous comments, anonymous blogs. The perpetrator can strike from a distance without ever leaving their room. Women are just as capable of aggression and anger as men; the internet finally allows them to express it. In another time some of them would have been the nasty old gossip down the street who sent anonymous poison pen letters—now the availability and ease of the internet make it all too easy for women to act out. (and men too of course).

If I write in more detail about my experiences of this I’ll link this page of yours.
Here is an excellent example of the sort of thing I’m talking about though.
She’s trying to destroy me
A survivor of the 7/7 London attacks led a campaign to help victims – but the cruellest test of her life was yet to come