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Onion: Would-Be Assassin Not a Racist

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Love-Child of Cassandra and Sisyphus4/06/2010 3:18:35 pm PDT

We interrupt our non-stop coverage of the Apocalypse for today’s feel good moment:

Parents reunited with baby pulled rubble in Haiti

The parents of a Haitian baby rescued from the rubble after January’s devastating earthquake said Tuesday it was “a miracle” that the girl survived, addressing reporters a day after their emotional reunion in the U.S.

Junior Alexis, 24, and Nadine Devilme, 23, hugged their baby Jenny during a news conference conference in Florida, where the 5-month-old girl was treated.

“I want to thank everybody, all the doctors, all the lawyers, because everything that has happened here is a miracle because my baby is alive and we have arrived in the United States,” said Alexis, a hip-hop musician in Haiti who spoke through an interpreter.

Bob Martinez, the attorney for Jenny’s parents, also teared up. He said the couple has received a one-year humanitarian visa from the U.S. government. The girl has received a two-year visa.