re: #129 A Mom Anon

I don’t get why people think it’s ever ok to hit a kid. Especially in anger, but really, not ever. A swat on the behind, lightly is as far as is ok, but beyond that, no and not with an object. All it teaches is anger, fear and that violence is a way of problem solving or forcing people to do what you want.

If you have to resort to hitting, you’ve already lost whatever it was you’re trying to win. I’ve raised an incredibly difficult child. I spanked him once, when he ran into traffic, I retrieved him and he tried it a second time. He and I were in immediate danger and he didn’t grasp the severity of the situation. Beyond that, I never hit either of my kids and we somehow managed to navigate some seriously fucked up situations. Violence shouldn’t be part of family life. It has no place there.

When I was a kid, hitting was a deterrent. There was no attempt at teaching anything, it was a simple - you do something we don’t want you to do and you’ll get hit. My dad did it to my mom, my younger brother and me. My mom did it to my younger brothers and me. I did it to my younger brothers.

It worked rather poorly. That’s one reason I’m sure prison as a deterrent only, doesn’t work.