re: #43 SanFranciscoZionist

“I’m standin’ in the kitchen, carving up a chicken for dinner, minding my own business, when in storms my husband, Wilbur, in a jealous rage. “You’ve been screwing the milkman,” he said. He was crazy, and he kept on screaming, “You’ve been screwing the milkman.” And then he ran into my knife… he ran into my knife ten times.”

I may or may not have told this story here before, but my dad once had a client who wanted him to initiate divorce proceedings against her husband.

Then the woman disappeared.

Some time later, he got a call from her from the police station.

She had decided that she should have her husband’s prized sports car, and still in possession of a key to it, went over to his apartment to take it from him. He got behind the car shouting that she could not take it.

She had it in reverse and floored the engine, running him over with both sets of wheels. The she put it into forward and ran him over again. Then reverse… then forward…

Something like 70 times before the police arrived.

Dad suggested that she needed a very specialized criminal attorney. He then never took a divorce case again.