OT, a small palate cleanser.

Drafting Guys Over 60
>
> (This is so funny & obviously written by a former
> soldier.)
>
> New Direction for the war on terrorists. Send Service Vets
> over 60 years old.
>
> I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I’m too old to
> track down terrorists. You can’t be older than 42 to
> join the military. They’ve got the whole thing
> backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight,
> they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn ‘t be able
> to join a military unit until you’re at least 35.
>
> For starters:
>
> Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10
> seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a
> day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day
> to concentrate on the enemy.
>
> Young guys haven’t lived long enough to be cranky, and
> a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. ‘My back hurts
> ! I can’t sleep, I’m tired and hungry.’ We are
> impatient and maybe letting us kill some idiot that
> desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us
> up for a while.
>
> An 18 -year-old doesn’t even like to get up before 10
> a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the heck.
> Besides, like I said, ‘I’m tired and can’t sleep
> and since I’m already up, I may as well be up killing
> some fanatic.
>
> If captured we couldn’t spill the beans because
> we’d forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and
> serial number would be a real brainteaser.
>
>
> Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We’re used to
> getting screamed and yelled at, and we’re used to soft
> food. We’ve also developed an appreciation for guns.
> We’ve been using them for years as an excuse to get out
> of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.
>
> They could lighten up on the obstacle course, however.
> I’ve been in combat and didn’t see a single 20-foot
> wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any
> push ups after completing basic training. I can hear the
> Drill Sgt. In the ‘New army’ now, ‘Get down and
> give me . ER … One.’
>
> Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy,
> too. I’ve never seen anyone outrun a bullet.
>
> An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He’s
> still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a
> pretty girl. He still hasn’t figured out that a baseball
> cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.
>
> These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to
> learn a little more about life before sending them off into
> harm’s way.
>
> Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward
> terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see right
> now is a couple of million ticked-off old farts with
> ‘attitude’ and automatic weapons who know that their
> best years are already behind them.
>
> If nothing else, put us on border patrol … We will have
> it secured the first night !
>
> If you want to, share this with your senior friends.
> It’s purposely in big type so they can read it.
>