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Onion: Popular Children's Book Author Reveals the 'Spooky Truth' About Creepy Conspiracy Theories

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William Lewis5/31/2013 5:17:37 am PDT

re: #25 Vicious Babushka

That’s a mighty large projector you have there, Bryan.

Bryan, if Obama was the totalitarian you claim, you’d already be dead. Perhaps thrown out of a helicopter ala the Argentinian junta’s preferred way of murdering leftists and union members? Never mind, you’d have simply just disappeared long ago.

But guess what? You haven’t. You’re still allowed to keep peddling your anti-Christian BS every few minutes on twitter because, in fact, you aren’t being persecuted by some imaginary totalitarian government.

Sad little Bryan. Hope you like goats…