The Plot Thickens!

This is the current, most highly evolved version of a warning I issued a couple of years ago on several message boards, including Rantburg and LGF:

Monkey uprising overruns Bangladeshi town
Monkeys terrorize Indian government.
Monkeys invade Indian embassy in Nepal. (An alliance with Maoist rebels?)

There is mounting evidence that monkeys and their relatives are plotting to overthrow human civilization, almost certainly in collusion with the great apes. That’s right, you think they are cute hairy little bare-ass creatures, but don’t let the sly beasts fool you!

At some point in the year 2012, the Moon will align with (something or other) and that will cause a great awakening in the consciousness of every ape, monkey, and baboon… spider monkeys and lemurs, too. Then the little monsters are going to rip and sack their way through the unsuspecting nations of the Earth.

Many leading humans have been aware of this simian conspiracy for some time. Why do you think experienced ape-fighter Charlton Heston was named to lead the NRA a few years ago? Heston is out of the loop now, but others have taken his place in preparing our resistance. Stock up on guns, ammo, and bananas!

The conspiracy seems concentrated in the Indian subcontinent. An attempt to gain control of Indian nuclear weapons at an early stage? Can faithful Lizardoids be sure that all of our posters are loyal humans? Couldn’t one or more of them be the proverbial monkey pecking at a keyboard, sent here to spy out the scientifically conscious resistance?

(Yes, I know that apes are not monkeys, but the great apes have long been suspected of masterminding the anti-human conspiracy.)

I will continue to raise the alarm about this gorilla warfare conspiracy, despite protests and threats from simian-citizens pressure groups and their lawyers and media dupes.