Scientist: “We need the government to fund scientific research.”

Conservative: “Socialism!”

Bioethicist: “We need to bring health care costs down, and provide coverage to the uninsured.”

Conservative: “Socialism!”

Preacher: “We need the government to fund abstinance only education programs, faith based initiatives, and textbooks that promote ‘Intelligent Design’ in the public schools.”

Conservative: “Freemarket!”