January 20 2015:
“We interrupt our regularly scheduled program to bring you a special address from President Palin.”
“Good evening my fellow Americans. I hope all of you are recovering nicely from that nasty flu bug that’s been going around. Who needs vaccines anyway? Just a few sniffles and some aches and that’s it. Don’t believe all that atheist propaganda about 10000 deaths in the northeast and all that. People die every day!
And a special shout-out to all the nice folks in Wyoming who are still getting past the lib media hysteria over that so-called nuclear waste accident. My executive order to change the half-life of ura-na-nium still stands, since we all know that nothing can take more than 6000 years. The Bible says so! You betcha!
To get down to brass tacks, I have decided to move on to spend more time with the family and fight the court case over the unfortunate events that have befallen that rat, er, misguided youth Levi Johnston. My resignation will be effective at noon tomorrow.
Don’t worry though, Vice-President Jindal will step right up and continue my policies to the letter, er, letters. Anyway, everybody have a good night and remember us in your prayers.”