Get yer hazmat suits and hip waders ready. Here’s a list of some of the CPAC speakers and events today, according to their official schedule:

Ted Cruz
Pat Toomey
Guy Benson from Townhall
Paul Ryan
Tim Scott

Panel discussion: Does the US Congress matter anymore? Executive Orders and the Hopelessness of EVER Curtailing Federal Spending — moderated by David Keene of the Moonie Times, with Tom Coburn and George Will

Mitch McConnell
John Bolton
Chris Christie
Bobby Jindal

Andrew Breitbart Defender of the First Amendment Award Sponsored by Citizens United — presented to Mark Levin

Wayne LaPierre
Donald Trump

We are going to drown in a sea of stupid today.